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I was inches away from Alex.
“I….I do not know what they are talking about?” she gulped that’s how I knew she was lying.
That’s when Devon said “She can see us. She chooses not to see us. She’s suppressing back her gift. And she isn’t the only one. Her grandmother had the gift. That’s why she died, spirits entered her body and tore her apart because she refused to help us anymore.”
That’s when Alex when by me and yelled “Don’t say that my grandmother was a great grandmother. And you demons killed her, just leave me the fuck alone, I never wanted this for me. So just leave me and my family alone!” Alex walked again past me and into her house without touching the handle the door opened and she entered and closed the door.
“So, I guess this means I’m not moving on to the other side even though I kept my part of the deal, huh?” I felt my soul shatter, I felt my feet slowly sink down into this earth.
“Dianna we’re sorry we were just trying to help you I guess we should have told you this huh?” Said Amanda putting her arm around me.
I fell down and sat on the earth ground, “No it’s okay you guys were just trying to help me. It was your job, but thanks anyway.”
“Remember if you need our help you know what to do.” Brandon said.
“Yeah I guess.”
Chapter 3
I’m sorry but it’s my duties, either I move on or stay forever.
I walked around Alex’s house and every time I would walk past Alex’s kitchen window I would feel electricity strike me, in a painful miserable way. After walking around the house about 30 times because I kept track I went to Alex’s door and knocked. No one answered so I tried to walk in and I couldn’t step through. I got off the porch and ran to the door, and I got through but I was pinned to the ground and I felt as if electricity went through my body I felt as if I was being killed. I yelled out in pain for a minute when Alex walked into the living room and said “I didn’t want to do this. All I wanted was to help you move on but you had to make it hard.”
My lungs felt as if they were going to explode, all I could seem to do is scream. Scream out in pain. I felt one last jolt and I lost consciousness. I do not know how I could pass out I’m dead this is just my soul but it did happen and it hurt like never before. I woke to the smell of a cigarette smell. I took in a breath and coughed, my lungs hurt, I wish I could drink water but it may just go right through me. That made me smile, I heard someone walk in I opened my eyes and Alex stood over me staring me down. She asked “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to leave your home? Why did you have to choose me?”
MY smile fell from my face and I said in a raspy voice “I didn’t choose you…….God brought me to you.” I blinked slowly.
Alex sat down next to me when I actually looked away from her I saw that I was in a little room, barely enough room for a bed and a dresser. Alex had her hand to her lips, “look I’m sorry about what I did but, it’s just I didn’t want what the ghosts did to my grandma to happen to me. And I was scared if I let you in you would take over me you know?”
I moved my head up and down but it hurt to move, even my lips it hurt to move. I sucked it in and tried not to cry but tears rolled down my cheeks. They felt as if they weighed a thousand pounds. But in reality they were just little droplets. My hand moved out away from my side and I reached to touch her, she flinched but she let me touch her cheek. My hand fell down and I closed my eyes. It felt like she was going to leave because it sounded as if she had gotten up.
I then felt warmth touch my forehead, I then heard Alex say “I’m sorry for hurting you. But everything I said I meant and, I would never lie to you about that.” I opened my eyes and smiled with my eyes I closed them again. That’s when I felt my lips set fire, I opened my eyes and Alex was kissing me. I closed them and I raised my arm to wrap it around her neck. I felt her hand touch my leg, it brought peace to me and also it scared me. I had done wrong when I was alive. Now that I was dead I was doing even more wrong then before. Her lips collided with mine as if they were a perfect fit, nothing could separate them. At least that’s what it felt like. My hand touched her Mohawk, she buzzed the sides of her head and she had a Mohawk running down her head. If I didn’t know any better I would say she was a guy. But, she wasn’t and she could now never be with me, because I’m dead and she’s still living. Alex’s grandma walked in that’s when I just gave up Alex kept kissing me and I just lost interest. Alex stopped looked at the doorway and saw her grandmother so angry.
“Alex you said you weren’t letting her in?” Her grandmother’s arms crossed over her chest.
“She’s the only girl I’ve felt right being with, don’t mess this up for me.”
“But she’s dead you can never be with her!”
“Your dead too but your still here! That hasn’t stopped you from letting me find happiness.” Alex moved away from me and stood in front of her grandmother and said “Now I think your mission is done grandma.”
That’s when her grandmother’s face looked scared and she slowly turned invisible all I heard was “I’m sorry baby I love you please don’t,” and that was it.
I moved the blanket from my body and asked “Alex where is she?”
“She’s in the purgatory.” She smirked as if she did this all the time.
I gasped and said “Are you serious?”
“Yeah.” she said it as if she was powerful.
“How did you do it? I guess you really didn’t want anything to do with us souls huh?” I bit my lip a little bit.
Grandma taught me how to do it when I was about 10. She saw spirits contacting me since the day I was born, and I gave my mom a hell of a time when I was a baby.” She laughed “Anyway I’m supposedly gifted so I guess that had a hole lot to do with it. I don’t actually like have control. I just wish for it to happen and things just fall into place.”
I slowly sat up and I looked at Alex and asked. “Did you wish for me to die?”
Alex gulped her hands now moved to the inside of her pockets, she avoided eye contact and she said “Sometimes I did. I guess I never thought how much I really needed you, until I lost you and this time it’s for good. I guess I wanted to hurt you……but in reality, I ended up hurting myself because of the love I had for you.” Alex moved towards me and sat next to me.
“Oh.” I said, I desperately needed something but I had no idea what.
Alex’s hand reached my cheek, “Dianna I never wanted to hurt you, it was an accident. I know I was being selfish by wanting you not to breath but, I hurt myself in the end.”
I looked away and said “It doesn’t matter Alex. The only way you can help me it’s if you finish my tasks that I didn’t get to do. Alex I beg you to tell my parents about me or at least get my cousin’s attention for me.” The last words came out as if I had a dry mouth.
“Here you need this.” Alex handed me a cup that had a clear liquid, with a plant on top. I drank it down and it burnt my throat I ignored the pain and chugged it down. Alex then said “Whoa there careful it’s only supposed to heal you not drunken you.”
I laughed and asked “What was that?”
Alex smiled and said “That was Smirnoff with a little leaf from the white tree.
I burped and replied “Sorry. So your saying that you just gave me vodka?”
Alex just nodded.
“Are you freaking serious? This is illegal for you. Your underage.”
“Says the girl that’s dead, and besides I’m older than you.” She got the bottle from beside the bed and drank it.
“Alex you know I hate it when you drink. It doesn’t look good on you and are you going to help me or not. I only have 3 days now please.” Alex drew the bottle away from her lips.
Her eyes looked at me and I loved them so much her freckles had a soft spot in my heart. Her lips were the perfect size and red. And her hair. Why is it so wrong to be bisexual, gay, and lesbian. You can’t change who the people are.
It’s not usually people’s fault they are the way they are. God wants people for who they are.
“Alex I love you so much.” I through myself at her like never done before. She dropped the bottle, luckily she had carpet for the ground and she had already put the lid on the bottle. Alex just sat there while I pressed my whole body to hers. My knees hit her right leg that’s when she turned and hugged me.
Her wait was to mine, my breast were to hers, I never felt more happier in my life. But, I also felt as if I was betraying God. I kissed her that’s when I felt Alex’s hand reach under my shirt. I pushed away and said “Alex I can’t do that with you. Even though I want to it’s against my morals. I can never betray God like that.”
Alex just licked her lips and said “I understand Dianna it’s cool. Right ok so let’s go find your cousin. You have to get done with this so you can rest in peace.” Alex broke away from me, she grabbed the bottle and walked out of the room. I sat on the bed and kept going over and over in my mind why I had almost done something with Alex. I’m pretty sure doing that with her was wrong because I’m dead and she needs someone that can love her forever. Maybe I can look for her girl so she can be happy.
I walked out of the room and Alex had already finished the bottle and she opened a new one this time the new one was twice as big. I walked up to her and grabbed the bottle, “Alex stop your going to drug yourself with this. I can see your killing your soul.”
“Good I want to be dead so we can be together forever.”
I gasped and stepped back letting go of the bottle. “Alex are you fucking serious right now! Do you think I wanted all of this to happen? I had my future planned out, I wanted to live in the adult world. You are almost done and you want to end it, because you suddenly decided that you love me? That ain‘t going to fly with me. I‘m sorry but this isn‘t
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