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Paris. These are news indeed!

Lady. Here comes your father. Tell him so yourself, And see how be will take it at your hands.

 

Enter Capulet and Nurse.

 

Cap. When the sun sets the air doth drizzle dew, But for the sunset of my brother’s son It rains downright.

How now? a conduit, girl? What, still in tears?

Evermore show’ring? In one little body Thou counterfeit’st a bark, a sea, a wind: For still thy eyes, which I may call the sea, Do ebb and flow with tears; the bark thy body is Sailing in this salt flood; the winds, thy sighs, Who, raging with thy tears and they with them, Without a sudden calm will overset

Thy tempest-tossed body. How now, wife?

Have you delivered to her our decree?

Lady. Ay, sir; but she will none, she gives you thanks.

I would the fool were married to her grave!

Cap. Soft! take me with you, take me with you, wife.

How? Will she none? Doth she not give us thanks?

Is she not proud? Doth she not count her blest, Unworthy as she is, that we have wrought So worthy a gentleman to be her bridegroom?

Jul. Not proud you have, but thankful that you have.

Proud can I never be of what I hate,

But thankful even for hate that is meant love.

Cap. How, how, how, how, choplogic? What is this?

‘Proud’- and ‘I thank you’- and ‘I thank you not’-

And yet ‘not proud’? Mistress minion you, Thank me no thankings, nor proud me no prouds, But fettle your fine joints ‘gainst Thursday next To go with Paris to Saint Peter’s Church, Or I will drag thee on a hurdle thither.

Out, you green-sickness carrion I out, you baggage!

You tallow-face!

Lady. Fie, fie! what, are you mad?

Jul. Good father, I beseech you on my knees, Hear me with patience but to speak a word.

Cap. Hang thee, young baggage! disobedient wretch!

I tell thee what-get thee to church a Thursday Or never after look me in the face.

Speak not, reply not, do not answer me!

My fingers itch. Wife, we scarce thought us blest That God had lent us but this only child; But now I see this one is one too much, And that we have a curse in having her.

Out on her, hilding!

Nurse. God in heaven bless her!

You are to blame, my lord, to rate her so.

Cap. And why, my Lady Wisdom? Hold your tongue, Good Prudence. Smatter with your gossips, go!

Nurse. I speak no treason.

Cap. O, God-i-god-en!

Nurse. May not one speak?

Cap. Peace, you mumbling fool!

Utter your gravity o’er a gossip’s bowl, For here we need it not.

Lady. You are too hot.

Cap. God’s bread I it makes me mad. Day, night, late, early, At home, abroad, alone, in company,

Waking or sleeping, still my care hath been To have her match’d; and having now provided A gentleman of princely parentage,

Of fair demesnes, youthful, and nobly train’d, Stuff’d, as they say, with honourable parts, Proportion’d as one’s thought would wish a man-And then to have a wretched puling fool, A whining mammet, in her fortune’s tender, To answer ‘I’ll not wed, I cannot love; I am too young, I pray you pardon me’!

But, an you will not wed, I’ll pardon you.

Graze where you will, you shall not house with me.

Look to’t, think on’t; I do not use to jest.

Thursday is near; lay hand on heart, advise: An you be mine, I’ll give you to my friend; An you be not, hang, beg, starve, die in the streets, For, by my soul, I’ll ne’er acknowledge thee, Nor what is mine shall never do thee good.

Trust to’t. Bethink you. I’ll not be forsworn. Exit.

Jul. Is there no pity sitting in the clouds That sees into the bottom of my grief?

O sweet my mother, cast me not away!

Delay this marriage for a month, a week; Or if you do not, make the bridal bed In that dim monument where Tybalt lies.

Lady. Talk not to me, for I’ll not speak a word.

Do as thou wilt, for I have done with thee. Exit.

Jul. O God!- O nurse, how shall this be prevented?

My husband is on earth, my faith in heaven.

How shall that faith return again to earth Unless that husband send it me from heaven By leaving earth? Comfort me, counsel me.

Alack, alack, that heaven should practise stratagems Upon so soft a subject as myself!

What say’st thou? Hast thou not a word of joy?

Some comfort, nurse.

Nurse. Faith, here it is.

Romeo is banish’d; and all the world to nothing That he dares ne’er come back to challenge you; Or if he do, it needs must be by stealth.

Then, since the case so stands as now it doth, I think it best you married with the County.

O, he’s a lovely gentleman!

Romeo’s a dishclout to him. An eagle, madam, Hath not so green, so quick, so fair an eye As Paris hath. Beshrew my very heart, I think you are happy in this second match, For it excels your first; or if it did not, Your first is dead-or ‘twere as good he were As living here and you no use of him.

Jul. Speak’st thou this from thy heart?

Nurse. And from my soul too; else beshrew them both.

Jul. Amen!

Nurse. What?

Jul. Well, thou hast comforted me marvellous much.

Go in; and tell my lady I am gone,

Having displeas’d my father, to Laurence’ cell, To make confession and to be absolv’d.

Nurse. Marry, I will; and this is wisely done. Exit.

Jul. Ancient damnation! O most wicked fiend!

Is it more sin to wish me thus forsworn, Or to dispraise my lord with that same tongue Which she hath prais’d him with above compare So many thousand times? Go, counsellor!

Thou and my bosom henceforth shall be twain.

I’ll to the friar to know his remedy.

If all else fail, myself have power to die. Exit.

 

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ACT IV. Scene I.

Friar Laurence’s cell.

 

Enter Friar, [Laurence] and County Paris.

 

Friar. On Thursday, sir? The time is very short.

Par. My father Capulet will have it so, And I am nothing slow to slack his haste.

Friar. You say you do not know the lady’s mind.

Uneven is the course; I like it not.

Par. Immoderately she weeps for Tybalt’s death, And therefore have I little talk’d of love; For Venus smiles not in a house of tears.

Now, sir, her father counts it dangerous That she do give her sorrow so much sway, And in his wisdom hastes our marriage To stop the inundation of her tears,

Which, too much minded by herself alone, May be put from her by society.

Now do you know the reason of this haste.

Friar. [aside] I would I knew not why it should be slow’d.-

Look, sir, here comes the lady toward my cell.

 

Enter Juliet.

 

Par. Happily met, my lady and my wife!

Jul. That may be, sir, when I may be a wife.

Par. That may be must be, love, on Thursday next.

Jul. What must be shall be.

Friar. That’s a certain text.

Par. Come you to make confession to this father?

Jul. To answer that, I should confess to you.

Par. Do not deny to him that you love me.

Jul. I will confess to you that I love him.

Par. So will ye, I am sure, that you love me.

Jul. If I do so, it will be of more price, Being spoke behind your back, than to your face.

Par. Poor soul, thy face is much abus’d with tears.

Jul. The tears have got small victory by that, For it was bad enough before their spite.

Par. Thou wrong’st it more than tears with that report.

Jul. That is no slander, sir, which is a truth; And what I spake, I spake it to my face.

Par. Thy face is mine, and thou hast sland’red it.

Jul. It may be so, for it is not mine own.

Are you at leisure, holy father, now, Or shall I come to you at evening mass Friar. My leisure serves me, pensive daughter, now.

My lord, we must entreat the time alone.

Par. God shield I should disturb devotion!

Juliet, on Thursday early will I rouse ye.

Till then, adieu, and keep this holy kiss. Exit.

Jul. O, shut the door! and when thou hast done so, Come weep with me-past hope, past cure, past help!

Friar. Ah, Juliet, I already know thy grief; It strains me past the compass of my wits.

I hear thou must, and nothing may prorogue it, On Thursday next be married to this County.

Jul. Tell me not, friar, that thou hear’st of this, Unless thou tell me how I may prevent it.

If in thy wisdom thou canst give no help, Do thou but call my resolution wise

And with this knife I’ll help it presently.

God join’d my heart and Romeo’s, thou our hands; And ere this hand, by thee to Romeo’s seal’d, Shall be the label to another deed,

Or my true heart with treacherous revolt Turn to another, this shall slay them both.

Therefore, out of thy long-experienc’d time, Give me some present counsel; or, behold, ‘Twixt my extremes and me this bloody knife Shall play the empire, arbitrating that Which the commission of thy years and art Could to no issue of true honour bring.

Be not so long to speak. I long to die If what thou speak’st speak not of remedy.

Friar. Hold, daughter. I do spy a kind of hope, Which craves as desperate an execution As that is desperate which we would prevent.

If, rather than to marry County Paris Thou hast the strength of will to slay thyself, Then is it likely thou wilt undertake A thing like death to chide away this shame, That cop’st with death himself to scape from it; And, if thou dar’st, I’ll give thee remedy.

Jul. O, bid me leap, rather than marry Paris, From off the battlements of yonder tower, Or walk in thievish ways, or bid me lurk Where serpents are; chain me with roaring bears, Or shut me nightly in a charnel house, O’ercover’d quite with dead men’s rattling bones, With reeky shanks and yellow chapless skulls; Or bid me go into a new-made grave

And hide me with a dead man in his shroud-Things that, to hear them told, have made me tremble-And I will do it without fear or doubt, To live an unstain’d wife to my sweet love.

Friar. Hold, then. Go home, be merry, give consent To marry Paris. Wednesday is tomorrow.

Tomorrow night look that thou lie alone; Let not the nurse lie with thee in thy chamber.

Take thou this vial, being then in bed, And this distilled liquor drink thou off; When presently through all thy veins shall run A cold and drowsy humour; for no pulse Shall keep his native progress, but surcease; No warmth, no breath, shall testify thou livest; The roses in thy lips and cheeks shall fade To paly ashes, thy eyes’ windows fall Like death when he shuts up the day of life; Each part, depriv’d of supple government, Shall, stiff and stark and cold, appear like death; And in this borrowed likeness

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