Faeries Don'T Have To Work, LAZARUS [ebook reader library TXT] 📗

/> “Hahaha! That’s so funny. No…none of that. Those are only fantasy folklores. This is reality.” She laughs, doing somersaults in mid air.
“Well then…?”
“Ok, I am to be your companion, and a kind of guru, when you need me. I know a lot about many things. I can keep you safe from all types of harm. My instinct lets me know when something bad is about to befall you. And…also I can keep your pets and plants company when you’re at work or away.
I’ll also laugh at your jokes, smile when you are happy, and cry with genuine sympathetic tears, when you are sad.”
“What if one of my friends spots you?” I inquire of this tiny beauty.
“They can’t see me, only you…unless you tell me to become visible to them.”
“So, when do you begin?”
“Before I actually become yours, relatively speaking, there are papers to be filled out.”
“Forms! What’s with all these forms?”
“Just procedure…that’s all. A formality, stating certain rules and regulations, and questions, such as…your physical description, age, background, likes, dislikes, education, hobbies, dreams, and fears, etc.
You must also promise to treat me well. Not abuse me in any way. And in return I promise to do likewise…and if I get an uncontrollable urge to bite, I will do so with the least discomfort as possible.
Oh yes, one more thing…very important…faeries don’t have to do work. That’s the law; written and otherwise.”
“Interesting. Ok, so where and when do I sign?”
“I’ll bring the forms to you later, or tomorrow. By the way…what is your name?” she asks me.
I tell her that it’s Calvin, as I stick out my right hand to her. She lands lightly on my other open hand, and stands there grinning broadly, as she extends her own tiny hand.
“Hi, Cal. Nice to make your acquaintance and to allow my imprint on you.”
Now that she is not hovering, but is standing still, I get the chance to really see what she looks like. She has a short forest green tunic that fits her nicely. No shoes or sandals or any fancy ornaments. Just some beads woven into two braids on each side of her pixie face. Her bright emerald eyes complement her long dark hair and tawny complexion.
She allows me to touch her naked shoulder. It feels warm and soft, much like a grown woman, but, so much smaller. If she was the size of a full grown person, I could easily fall in love with her looks right this instance.
“What are you thinking of, Cal? Do tell.”
“Oh, nothing too important. Say, are you able to make yourself bigger? You know, like five foot plus.”
She gives me this odd look and says, “We can talk about that at a later date.” Then she becomes quiet…but only for a moment.
She is now sitting on my knee like a tiny kitten, jabbering away a mile a minute.
The night sky overhead is twinkling with billion stars… truly an awesome sight. It makes me feel so insignificant…so tiny. The moon is floating just over the lake, threatening to dive into its depths any moment soon.
Other than the rippling sound of the waves striking the rocky shore, the only other sound belongs to this wee creature, still telling me just about anything and everything that pops into her tiny head.
“No, we don’t reside here all year round. We migrate south as the weather cools. We sleep whenever we’re tired. Eat when the urge comes. Some of us like berries over bugs. Others prefer nuts.”
“I like worms!” a voice from above shouts out.
“Hey, Wanda, clam up and stop eavesdropping on our conversation…okay? Go away!”
“That’s Wicked Wanda. She’s called that because she loves to tease humans…especially males.”
“You have all these weird names for each other, why?” I ask.
“Mainly because it identifies us…makes us individuals. Take for instance, Mad Marsha. She fell asleep under a toadstool one night with her mouth open, and some of the spores fell into her mouth during the night. The effect on her became permanent. Don’t worry…she’s not dangerous…but never mention the wart on her nose.
Now, there’s Rosie the Red. She has flaming red hair and a smattering of freckles all over her body.
There’s Tess theTinkler. Be careful of her. If she lands on you, she will leave a wet spot on you…on purpose.”
As Mel finishes relating this to me, I hear laughter coming from a nearby bush.
Just about then, the moon sinks out of sight, and the stars become even brighter.
I get curious, so I inquire of my tiny new found friend, “Mel, I notice that you, although small in stature, look complete in every way, maybe with the exception of those large pointed ears. Do you possess…um…how can I put it delicately…?”
She, sensing what I was about to ask, said, “Don’t ask, Cal.”
“Do you have…?”
“Yes”
“But…”
“We’ll talk about that when the time comes. So forget about it for now. Ok?”
To change the subject, she asks me what I’m drinking.
I tell her that it’s beer.
“I never had that, but I tried wine a long time ago. It made me sneeze so hard that I slammed into a tree. Ever tried flying or hovering while sneezing hard a dozen times or so?”
“No. Maybe beer won’t have the same effect on you as did the wine. Willing to try a sip?”
She holds onto the rim of my glass, as I tilt it towards her. She cautiously brings her face up to the foamy broth, takes a small sip at first, and then almost sticks her whole head into the brew.
“That’s great! Can I have some more?” she begs me.
“I think that should do for tonight…maybe tomorrow. First we need to see if it will have any adverse effect on you.” I tell her.
She is not too pleased, and looks as if she is ready to bite me again.


The fire is dwindling down to a few glowing embers, and I’m getting very sleepy. So, I crawl into my tent and get ready to hit the old sleeping bag.
Mel flitters in and hovers just above my pillow. I roll up my jacket and place it near my sleeping bag at an arm’s length from my pillow.
I leave a tiny light suspended from the tent ceiling, so that if I needed to go out to ease nature, I won’t be stumbling around in the dark.
Almost as soon as I bid Mel goodnight, I hear something that resembles a kitten purring. I look over and see Mel curled up in my jacket, softly snoring and fast asleep without a single care in the world.


Chapter Two

An incident at the lake


Morning comes early. The diffused sunlight which penetrates the orange canopy of my three man tent, gives the inside of it a warm tone…magical, with soft shadows.
I unzip the door flap and step outside. Stretch and inhale the pure crisp morning air. It’s intoxicating. I almost overdose on its freshness.
The weatherman had promised another warm and sunny day.
As I’m about to take a dip in the lake, I hear a small voice say, “Good morning, Cal. Did you sleep well?” I completely forgot about last evening’s events. They were so unusual that I thought that it was a dream…you know the beer, fresh air and this magical surrounding area. But no… seeing her now, standing, stretching and yawning as she steps out of my tent, brings me suddenly back to reality. And I say this reluctantly. Yet, there she is…just about half a foot high, pointed ears and all. Melissa…’Mel the Mischievous’.
“Well, good morning to you too.”I tell her. “How did you sleep? You were so quiet, I forgot that you were even there.”
“Can I have your jacket?”
“Why?” I laugh. “It’s way too big for you.”
“Not to wear, silly…to sleep in. I love it… and who knows, maybe one day I’ll wear it too.”
Just as I’m ready to go for a dip, she warns me to be on the lookout for the creature that lurks in this part of the lake.
“Creature! What are you saying?”
“The giant otter…about ten feet long…he’s nasty…very territorial. Doesn’t like strangers, especially faeries. Although you are the first human here in ages, so he may leave you alone. But I wouldn’t take that chance, if I were you, Cal.”
“So what am I to do? I need to bathe. I thought that a nice swim may not only cleanse me, but I’ll get some exercise at the same time.”
Just then, she calls out in a loud voice, “Hey Rambo! Can you scout the area for that pesky otter? Right away! Okay?”
“Rambo?” I look at her inquisitively.
“That’s Freddie. ‘Fearless Freddie’. He loves it when we call him Rambo. He works out and struts around real macho like. Had a crush on me…but he’s not my type. Eventually he met Wordie. That is her actual name. She loves to write and quote poetry. Those two are a number now …and now he leaves me be.”
Freddie zips off like a flash, and in three minutes is back, reporting that the coast is clear. The monster is at the far end of the lake.
I thank him and he flits away.
“Mel? Please turn and face the other way. I haven’t brought me swimsuit, because I wasn’t expecting company up here. So turn away while I slip into the water…ok?”
“Sure, whatever you say.”
Never trust a faerie, because as soon as I have my boxers off and ready to plunge, I hear a wolf whistle coming from Mel… the little bugger.
As I’m swimming further out I feel something land softly on my head. I immediately know who it is. “Nice view.” She says.
“Yes, it’s a beautiful lake, isn’t it? And the fall colors are beginning to show.”
She laughs, “I’m talking about your behind.”
“Fresh girl. Stop it, or get off!”
Suddenly she screams out, “Freddie, come quick. I need you now…hurry!”
I see and hear a disturbance a few yards off towards the middle of the lake.
Freddie is here in a flash. “It’s the giant otter! I thought that this place only had one. Cal, turn around and quickly head back to shore. I will do my best to distract it.”
I turn, and frantically begin swimming as never before. I don’t quite relish being chewed on by some prehistoric giant rodent.
Mel is yelling…or more like cursing. Then suddenly she dives and disappears under the wake. Rambo is hovering above the monster, trying to veer it off its destination…me.
Just as quickly as it occurred, the pursuit is off. The water behind me calms. There’s no sign of Mel, when I finally climb out of the lake, exhausted and spent. I wait for a minute or two, and then I start to really worry. Freddie and the others assure me that their friend is capable of taking care of herself. And she can swim like a fish, holding her breath for a long time.
What seems like an eternity passes by and yet still no sign of my tiny new found friend.
Then out of the water shoots this