Blood Land, J.R. Lawson [electric book reader .txt] 📗

place just gets me thinking about my dad.  He loved this stupid fair.  Wanted me to take it over for him one day.”

“He…died?” Nora deduced and softly asked.

Rogan nodded. “Yeah.”

“Can I…ask what happened?” Nora almost hesitated before asking her question.

Rogan shrugged, “Vampires got him.”

“I…I’m sorry.”

“Nah, don’t be,” Rogan interrupted, “It wasn’t your fault.  In fact, it was mine actually.”

Nora wanted to continue asking but she almost felt like she shouldn’t.  She knew how Rogan was about sharing things and she didn’t want to push it.  However, to her surprise, she didn’t have to say anything because Rogan began to continue his story.

“See…my dad and I, we had this cabin we used to go to every year in the winter, leading up to Christmas.  Well, it was about two years or so since the virus had struck and my dad didn’t think we needed to go that year.” Rogan paused for a minute and chuckled, “See, my dad was a very optimistic man.  He thought this vampire thing would be over within a couple of years and had it in his head that there would be plenty of other times we could go to the cabin.” He then looked over at Nora and smirked. “You kind of remind me of him, in a way, honestly.”

Nora then smiled warmly back at Rogan and watched him as he suddenly hung his head and continued on, “Well, I was the opposite.  I knew the reality was that this epidemic wasn’t going to just go away any time soon.  I was sure that this might be the last time we even get to go to the cabin.  So…I begged him to allow us to go.  I begged so much that he finally gave in.  And of course…the second after we got there, we were attacked.  And my dad got eaten.” Rogan spoke the last sentence with disdain and an almost disgusted look on his face.

“I’m so sorry, Rogan,” Nora comforted.  It was silent for a few seconds between them until she then added, “You both….were attacked?  How did you get away?”

Rogan chuckled slightly. “Well, let’s just say I fought as hard as I could and managed to get away with just a scar.”  He then proceeded to pull back the collar of his shirt and jacket to reveal a small bit of a mark that was peaking its way from around the back of his shoulder.

Nora gasped.  She didn’t mean to but it had just slipped out.  She recognized that scar without any doubt. “That…was the night you turned?” she let out in a whisper.

Rogan nodded. “Yep.  I was sixteen.”

“Rogan…” Nora now uttered, “You can’t blame yourself for that.  Just because you wanted to go to the cabin….what happened was out of your control…”

“Yeah well, lots of things that night were out of my control,” Rogan now angrily stated, “Even what I’d done after I turned….when I…” Rogan almost choked on his words slightly as he tried to speak, “When I smelled him…..” Rogan didn’t finish his sentence but just put his head in his hands and let out a long, quiet breath.

Nora hesitated at first but eventually gained the courage and put her hand on his shoulder. “Rogan…its o.k.  It still wasn’t your fault.”

Rogan then let out a huge breath of air and lifted his head abruptly, and ran his fingers through his hair nervously.  “Yeah…I know,” was all he said coldly.

It was awkwardly quiet for several minutes as Rogan and Nora looked out into the darkness, both thinking of many things.  However, finally Rogan decided to stir as he reached his hand into his jacket pocket and pulled out a folded up piece of paper.  He then flicked his hand toward Nora, the paper in between his index and middle finger, gesturing for her to take it.  “Before I forget,” he then said, “I wanted to give you this.”

“What is it?” Nora nervously asked as she slowly took it from him.

“It’s those stupid ass questions from your dumb diary,” Rogan lightly scoffed.

“You answered them?” Nora beamed slightly.

“Yeah, yeah, well….whatever.” Rogan shrugged.

Nora proceeded to open up the folded paper. “Do you mind if I read it out loud?” she then asked.

Rogan lightly chuckled and shrugged. “Whatever.” He then relaxed his position and leaned back slightly in the seat of the Ferris Wheel.

“Hm….” Nora then curiously said as she viewed the first question written on the page, “The first question….you’re name…is still blank.” She then looked over at him with a sarcastic smile.

Rogan returned a similar expression. “Pass,” was all he responded.

Nora just rolled her eyes and went back to looking at the paper in her hands, “O.k. well…question number two was: ‘What are your favorite and least favorite foods?’ You answered….pizza as your favorite?” Nora instantly shot him a look of disbelief, “Are you messing with me?”

Rogan chuckled as he just looked straight ahead of him.  “No, I really do like pizza.” He then turned to look at Nora briefly. “But I guess I was messing with you a little…”

Nora playfully scoffed and went back to reading, “Least favorite food…you didn’t write anything.” She looked back up at him.

“Cause I don’t have a least favorite.”

Nora rolled her eyes. “Yeah I guess you can’t be picky when you’re a vampire, huh?” she sarcastically remarked.  Rogan just responded by shooting her a patronizing look.

Nora ignored it and continued reading aloud, “Number three was: ‘what is your favorite time of day?’ You wrote: night.  Technically that’s not a time of day, you know.”

Rogan shrugged. “Well, I guess I don’t have a favorite time of day then.  Truth is, I’ve always been a night owl.  I loved staying up late into the wee hours of the night.  Even before….I became a vampire.”

It was awkwardly quiet between them for a few beats and Nora decided to just continue reading, “O.k. question number five was: ‘what is your favorite thing about you?’  You wrote: eyes.”  Nora now looked up at him with much curiosity.

“Yeah well…it used to be my eyes.  Before I was a vampire.” Rogan said, responding to her enquiring face.

“What were your eyes like before?” Nora asked.

Rogan lightly chuckled to himself before answering, “They were blue.”

“Wow…really?” Nora smiled widely as she looked over at Rogan’s face.  She tried picturing in her mind what he had looked like without his, in her mind, signature red eyes.

“Yeah.  I really liked them.  They really are the one thing I really liked about myself.  Not to mention, most girls liked them too.”  He then shot Nora a slightly smug smile.  She rolled her eyes back at him with a smile as well.

“But,” Rogan went on, “Now they’re just like any other vampires.  Red.  Boring.  Not unique.  Kind of what comes with becoming a vampire.  You’re not really yourself anymore.  Just a part of a…pack.  Like an animal.”

Nora sighed.  Rogan wasn’t looking at her anymore.  He was back to looking straight ahead of him, into the darkness.  She desperately wanted to tell him that she actually liked his red eyes, but soon decided against it.  Instead, she just looked back down at the paper in her hands and cleared her throat to read the next question, “The last question was: ‘what is it you are most scared of?’ You wrote…”

“I’m afraid that if my dad were alive right now he wouldn’t be proud of the person I’d become,” Rogan suddenly finished for her.  Nora looked over at Rogan again, this time silently.  She watched him rub his forehead with his hand as he sighed and looked downward. “I know he’d be disappointed in me.  For what I’ve done in my past.”

“Rogan…” Nora suddenly decided to say softly, “You really shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.  I’m sure your dad wouldn’t think that about you if he were here.”

“Yes he would,” Rogan argued, “If he knew all the things I’ve done.  What kind of person I am.  He’d hate me.  Because I should have known better.  I should have known not to go with Dagon.  Not to go with him or follow him.  But…I was a dumb little fledgling.  And I was scared and alone.  And he found me and told me he would take care of me.  And I let him.  I followed him and learned everything he had to teach me and did everything he asked me to do. Even though it was all a lie.  I never knew he was using me the whole time.  I should have, though.  I should have seen it.  I should have known what I was getting into. My dad would hate what an idiot I was.”

“Rogan, you were sixteen!” Nora abruptly shouted, “You can’t blame yourself for that!  You didn’t know what kind of person Dagon was.  How could you have?  You can’t beat yourself up about that.  Dagon used you.  He took advantage of your helplessness.”  It was quiet for a few seconds between them and Nora heaved a big sigh before then going on, “I think…your dad would be proud of you.  Of who you are now.  Of what you’ve done for me.  For how you left Dagon when you realized what you were becoming.”

Rogan now looked up and turned slightly to look at Nora. “You really think that?” he said.

“I do,” Nora sincerely answered.

Rogan scoffed with a small smile, “You’re probably wrong…but…thanks anyway.”

Nora smiled back and nodded once in reassurance.

“You really do remind me of him,” Rogan then said, still looking at her, “I guess that’s why I was so…fascinated by you to begin with.”

Nora continued smiling at Rogan as she then said, “Well, if I’m really anything like he was then I can definitely say that he would be proud of you now.  Because I know I am.”

A little larger smile began to peak its way across Rogan’s face now; however, he quickly turned his head away and tried to hide it.  Unfortunately for him, Nora caught a glimpse of it before he could completely conceal it.

“You know…” Rogan now said after a few beats of silence, “I guess that’s the real reason I don’t like using my first name.  I feel ashamed of it.  Of who I was.  I guess I secretly didn’t like who I was becoming and so I decided to erase that side of me completely; the part of me that reminded me of who I was with my dad.  I didn’t want to hear that name anymore.  So…I got rid of it.”

“You don’t have to tell it to me,” Nora then abruptly said.

“What?” Rogan responded to her comment with surprise.

“I’m serious.  I don’t need to know.  You don’t have to tell it to me.  It’s o.k.  I won’t bug you about it anymore.”

Rogan smiled a little and chuckled to himself. “O.k.,”  was all he said in reply.  He then leaned a little over the side of his seat and looked below him. “Well, I guess this thing really isn’t moving.  I guess it’s time I get us down from here.” He then turned to Nora, “What do ya say?”

“I say definitely!” Nora laughed a bit.

Rogan just nodded at her answer and then stood up and, in one swift movement, jumped off of the seat and landed extremely gracefully onto the ground.  Nora peered over the side of their seats in awe at Rogan’s refinement.  She continued to watch as he walked over to the Ferris Wheel’s controls and after some finessing, got the wheel moving again.  Nora heaved a small sigh of relief as she and her seat descended toward the ground.  However, all of a sudden, as soon as she was almost several feet from the ground, her decline stopped abruptly.

“W-what happened?!” Nora quickly asked in an extremely panicky tone.  She gripped the sides of her seat nervously and looked down at Rogan for some kind of verification.

“I guess it got stuck again,” Rogan shouted up to her as he scratched his head in confusion.  He stared at the control box for a few seconds and then proceeded to kick it, hoping that by some