Supplemental Nights to The Book of the Thousand and One Nights, Sir Richard Francis Burton [best short books to read .TXT] 📗

and drawing the other back. Then said he in himself, “I will go to my dwelling, and if my wife know me, then am I Ahmad the fuller; but an she know me not, I am a Turk.” So he betook himself to his house; but when his wife, the cunning witch, saw him, she cried out in his face, saying, “Whither now, O trooper? Wilt thou break into the house of Ahmad the fuller, and he a man of repute, having a brother-in-law a Turk, a man of rank with the Sultan? An thou depart not, I will acquaint my husband and he will requite thee thy deed.” When he heard her words, the dregs of his drink wobbled in his brain and he fancied that he was indeed a Turk. So he went out from her and putting his hand to his sleeve, found therein a writ and gave it to one who read it to him. When he heard that which was in the scroll, his mind was confirmed in his phantasy; but he said to himself, “My wife may be seeking to put a cheat on me; so I will go to my fellows the fullers; and if they recognise me not, then am I for sure Khamartakani the Turk.”

So he betook himself to the fullers and when they espied him afar off, they thought that he was really Khamartakani or one of the Turks, who used to send their washing to them without payment and give them never a stiver. Now they had complained of them aforetime to the Sultan, and he said, “If any one of the Turks come to you, pelt him with stones.” Accordingly, when they saw the fuller, they fell upon him with sticks and stones and pelted him; whereupon quoth he, “Verily, I am a Turk and knew it not.”

Then he took of the dirhams in his pouch and bought him victual for the way and hired a hackney and set out for Ispahan, leaving his wife to the trooper. “Nor,” continued the Wazir, “is this stranger than the story of the Merchant and the Crone and the King.” The Minister’s tale pleased King Shah Bakht and his heart clave to the story of the merchant and the old woman; so he bade AlRahwan withdraw to his lodging, and he went away to his house and abode there the next day till he should be summoned to the presence.

 

The Eighth Night of the Month.

 

When the evening evened, the king sat private in his chamber and bade fetch the Wazir, who presented himself before him, and the king required of him the story. So the Wazir answered “With love and gladness. Hear, O king,

 

The Tale of the Merchant, the Crone and the King.

 

There was once a family of affluence and distinction, in a city of Khorasan, and the townsfolk used to envy them for that which Allah had vouchsafed them. As time went on, their fortune ceased from them and they passed away, till there remained of them but one old woman. When she grew feeble and decrepit, the townsfolk succoured her not with aught, but thrust her forth of the city, saying, “This old woman shall not neighbour with us, for that we do good to her and she requiteth us with evil.”[FN#366] So she took shelter in a ruined place and strangers used to bestow alms upon her, and in this way she tarried a length of time. Now the king of that city had aforetime contended for the kingship with his uncle’s son, and the people disliked the king; but Allah Almighty decreed that he should overcome his cousin. However, jealousy of him abode in his heart and he acquainted the Wazir, who hid it not and sent him money. Furthermore, he fell to summoning all strangers who came to the town, man after man, and questioning them of their creed and their goods, and whoso answered him not satisfactory, he took his wealth.[FN#367] Now a certain wealthy man of the Moslems was wayfaring, without knowing aught of this, and it befel that he arrived at that city by night, and coming to the ruin, gave the old woman money and said to her, “No harm upon thee.” Whereupon she lifted up her voice and blessed him: so he set down his merchandise by her and abode with her the rest of the night and the next day. Now highwaymen had followed him that they might rob him of his monies, but succeeded not in aught: wherefore he went up to the old woman and kissed her head and exceeded in bounty to her. Then she warned him of that which awaited strangers entering the town and said to him, “I like not this for thee and I fear mischief for thee from these questions that the Wazir hath appointed for addressing the ignorant.” And she expounded to him the case according to its conditions: then said she to him, “But have thou no concern: only carry me with thee to thy lodging, and if he question thee of aught enigmatical, whilst I am with thee, I will expound the answers to thee.” So he carried the crone with him to the city and lodged her in his lodging and entreated her honourably. Presently, the Wazir heard of the merchant’s coming; so he sent to him and bade bring him to his house and talked with him awhile of his travels and of whatso had befallen him therein, and the merchant answered his queries. Then said the Minister, “I will put certain critical questions to thee, which an thou answer me, ‘twill be well for thee,” and the merchant rose and made him no answer. Quoth the Wazir, “What is the weight of the elephant?”

The merchant was perplexed and returned him no reply, giving himself up for lost; however, at last he said, “Grant me three days of delay.” The minister granted him the time he sought and he returned to his lodging and related what had passed to the old woman, who said, “When the morrow cometh, go to the Wazir and say to him, �Make a ship and launch it on the sea and put in it an elephant, and when it sinketh in the water, mark the place whereunto the water riseth. Then take out the elephant and cast in stones in its place, till the ship sink to that same mark; whereupon do thou take out the stones and weigh them and thou wilt presently know the weight of the elephant.’”[FN#368]

Accordingly, when he arose in the morning, he went to the Wazir and repeated to him that which the old woman had taught him; whereat the Minister marvelled and said to him, “What sayest thou of a man, who seeth in his house four holes, and in each hole a viper offering to sally out upon him and slay him, and in his house are four sticks and each hole may not be stopped but with the ends of two sticks? How, then, shall he stop all the holes and deliver himself from the vipers?” When the merchant heard this, there befel him such concern that it garred him forget the first and he said to the Wazir, “Grant me delay, so I may reflect on the reply”; and the Minister cried, “Go out, and bring me the answer, or I will seize thy monies.” The merchant fared forth and returned to the old woman who, seeing him changed of complexion, said to him, “What did his hoariness ask thee?” So he acquainted her with the case and she cried, “Fear not; I will bring thee forth of this strait.” Quoth he, “Allah requite thee with weal!”

Then quoth she, “Tomorrow go to him with a stout heart and say, �The answer to that whereof thou asketh me is this. Put the heads of two sticks into one of the holes; then take the other two sticks and lay them across the middle of the first two and stop with their two heads the second hole and with their ferrules the fourth hole. Then take the ferrules of the first two sticks and stop with them the third hole.’”[FN#369] So he repaired to the Wazir and repeated to him the answer; and he marvelled at its justness and said to him, “Go; by Allah; I will ask thee no more questions, for thou with thy skill marrest my foundation.”[FN#370] Then he treated him as a friend and the merchant acquainted him with the affair of the old woman; whereupon quoth the Wazir, “Needs must the intelligent company with the intelligent.” Thus did this weak woman restore to that man his life and his monies on the easiest wise; “Nor,” continued the Wazir, “is this stranger than the story of the Simpleton Husband.” When the king heard this, he said, “How like it must be to this our own case!” Then he bade the Minister retire to his lodging; so he withdrew and on the morrow he abode at home till the king should summon him to his presence.

 

The Ninth Night of the Month.

 

When the night came, the king sat private in his chamber and sending after the Wazir, sought of him the story; and he said “Hear, O august king,

 

The Tale of the Simpleton Husband.[FN#371]

 

There was once in olden time a foolish man and an ignorant, who had abounding wealth, and his wife was a beautiful woman, who loved a handsome youth. The Cicisbeo used to watch for her husband’s absence and come to her, and on this wise he abode a long while. One day of the days, as the woman was closeted with her lover, he said to her, “O my lady and my beloved, an thou desire me and love me, give me possession of thy person and, satisfy my need in the presence of thy husband; otherwise I will never again come to thee nor draw near thee while I live my life.” Now she loved him with exceeding love and could not suffer his separation an hour nor could endure to anger him; so, when she heard his words, she said to him, “Bismillah, so be it, in Allah’s name, O my darling and coolth of mine eyes: may he not live who would vex thee!” Quoth he, “To-day?” and quoth she, “Yes, by thy life,” and made an appointment with him for this.

When her husband came home, she said to him, “I want to go a-pleasuring,” and he said, “With all my heart.” So he went, till he came to a goodly place, abounding in vines and water, whither he carried her and pitched her a tent by the side of a tall tree; and she betook herself to a place alongside the tent and made her there a Sard�b, in which she hid her lover. Then said she to her husband, “I want to climb this tree;”[FN#372] and he said, “Do so.” So she clomb it and when she came to the tree-top, she cried out and slapped her face, saying, “O thou lecher, are these thy lewd ways? Thou swarest faith to me, and thou liedest.” And she repeated her speech twice and thrice. Then she came down from the tree and rent her raiment and said, “O lecher, an these be thy dealings with me before my eyes, how dost thou when thou art absent from me?” Quoth he, “What aileth thee?” and quoth she, “I saw thee futter the woman before my very eyes.” Cried he, “Not so, by Allah! But hold thy peace till I go up and see.” So he clomb the tree and no sooner did he begin to do so than out came the lover from his hiding-place and taking the woman by the legs, fell to shagging her.