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least not without a girl, but only the first time he saw one."
"Yah, when he saw Sara," Cal adds. Sara looks kind of like me, brown hair, about five-three. She does not have freckles though.
~I thought she was you, I have been waiting.


"I know he has been here for, what, about two days?" I tell him the only way I know how.
"Yep, a little longer I think," Ryan confirms.
~You are my Sacaw Hasla, my Goddess Girl. I am your Sacaw Hasla, your Goddess Boy. I am Jakole.


"No, he is, wow!" I reject him, no, no, no!
"Yah, that’s why I didn’t want to kill him," Ryan tells me.
"Yah," I tell him, "can we go get some food?"
"Sure, I’m hungry too," Cal tells me.

"Is he still out there?" I ask.
"Yes, but I doubt he is going to attack you, he has not gone near any of us, except that time with Sara, and that time with you yesterday," Mike tells me.
"You’re probably right bro."
"So I’ll see you later, 'kay?"
"Yah. Later." I walk out of the house and Jakole runs up, I keep walking.
~Sacaw Hasla, accept me, please!


"No!" I tell him allowed since no one can hear me.
~I will not give up. You can think words to me, too.


~Like this?
~Yes, I hear you.
~Well, my answer is still NO!
~Why?
~I just want to be normal! I’m not a Goddess Girl. They are LEDGENDS! MYTHS!
~She talked to you though, told you I was coming.
~In a dream.

I walk into my house.
He gives me emotions, pain, hurt, rejection.
"Took you long enough to heal," Mother scalds. "Father has been in a bad mood the last couple days."
“Sorry, ma’am.”
“Go see him, let him be happy again.” In other words, go get beaten again? I want to ask her.
~Do not go.
~Get out of my head!
~I will not give up.


I walk into the living room where Father sits on the couch. “Hello Sir.” He stands up and pulls me into the dining room.
“KIDS!” He yells. Two minutes later all my brothers that live at the house and their girls file in by age order. Isal and Ollie, Tim and Danielle, Raz and Rillie, Jack and Jill, Ham and Sara, George and Haly, Modle and Hether, Yar and Fernanda, Ben and Bes, Asum and Tal, Mic and Tally, Lams and Terra, Paul and Zoe, and Joey and Georgia. “Now I am going to make an example. So sit.” He brought me in here so everyone could watch.
~NO!
~Shut up!
~No, it hurts, your pain hurts!
~Get used to it, if you don’t leave now. It’s part of my life.


“Keep your eyes open, if you are not careful you might have this happen to yourself,” Father tells them all. He slaps me across the face.
A growl screams through my head.
He punches me in the gut and I double over in pain twice as bad as last time.
The growl changes into a snarl.
~Accept me!
~If I accept you, you still won’t be able to do anything.
~Please!
~Fine, I accep—


Father shoves me at the same time he pulls my arm, causing extreme pain in my shoulder.
~Then I come into you, body and soul.


My head is silent, but I still moan in pain as Father kicks my feet out from under me and my head hits the wood floor. Something had changed in the time my head became silent, and it hitting the floor.
“STOP!” says a man from the doorway.
“Why? I’m obeying the laws,” Father gives back. The man had the strangest hair, every shade of red and brown, which is what told me he was Jakole. He was also about fifteen. He was tall, about six-two, and his skin had a deep tan. He had freckles too.
“Not if you hit her again.”
“Why is that?”
~Go with this, okay?
~Okay.


“She is my girl.”
“Is this true?” Father shrieked.
“Yes,” I confirmed. It is true enough, I am his girl, but he is mine too, I understand that now. “I met him for the first time outside Ryan’s house.” It is true.
~Yes, I am glad.

All my brothers and their girls freeze.
~I don’t want to lie to all my brothers.
~We need to get your father out of the way.
~I know, but my brothers.
~Do not worry; we just need to get your father out of the way.
~Okay, then we will tell them?
~Yes.


“I came over to tell you.” Father screams and punches me again. I fall back and Jakole takes a step back.
A wolf growl rips through my mind; my ears hear nothing.
~Calm, Jakole.
~Sorry, Sacaw Hasla.
~It’s alright.
~He hurt us.
~Did you feel my pain before I came outside the first time?
~Yes.
~He is the one who made me able to hurt then, he broke my arm, and you see my cast.


“YOU HIT MY GIRL!”
“And there is nothing you can do about it!” Father sneered.
“You will go to jail!”
“Ha! Yah right!” Jakole leaps toward Father, pinning him to the ground.
“You will go to jail.” His anger swept me in waves making me feel like hitting something. I walk into the kitchen and pick up the phone.
“Nine-one-one, what’s your emergency?” asked a middle-aged man.
“My father has broken the law.”
“The police will be there in ten minutes.”
“Thank you,” I hang up, everyone knows all about me, so I don’t have to say where I was calling from or who I was, everyone knows me, and I know almost everyone by sight if not by voice, the man who had answered the phone was named Carl.
I walk into the dining room with almost all eyes on me, not Jakole’s and not Fathers. “What?”
“You, him, wah?” Paul stutters.
“I will explain once Father is gone.” It became twenty questions, but I stay silent until the police arrived.

I hear the sirens, ee-oo, ee-oo.
“What did your Father do?” asks a young police officer named Freandon.
“He hit me.”
“So, that is not against the law.”
“The law states, ‘Fathers must not abuse a girl once she has found her man.’”
“You have not found a man.”
~Tell him you are a Goddess Girl or you have found a boy.


“I have a man.”
“Ha!”
~Will you bring your human self to me?
~If that is what works best for you.
~It is. It will be easier to explain.

About five minutes later he comes trotting around the side of the house. “This is Jakole, he is my man.”
“How is that possible?”
“He made me. Deal with it. Now will you take Father away?”
“Yah,” he sounds kind of fazed.
As soon as the officer is gone with Father he trots off and changes back, it becomes a question and answer session.
“Where did your man go?”
“How come you didn’t meet him before?”
“What is his name?”
“I don’t have a man,” I told them all.
“What?” they all ask at once. “Who was that then?”
“I’m a Goddess Girl.”
“That’s not possible!” Ham tells me.
“Oh?”
“Yes, they are not real.”
“Why have I not met my man? Why am I so much better at school? ¿Por qué me capaz de luchar le todo tan bien? Sorry, why am I able to fight ya‘ll so well?”
“I don’t know!” Ham admits.
“It does answer all those questions. Except, who was that man?” Tim wonders aloud.
~Tell him it was an allusion. Do NOT tell him it was me!
~Why?
~It will just make things more challenging.
~Can you come in here? I don’t like you being this far away. I feel empty.
~In a little. I did not know I would ever feel this way.
~Me either.


“He was an allusion, Goddess Girls can do magic.”
“But he touched Father,” said Lams.
“Magic, remember?”
“Hum, but what about the wolf?” asks Ben.
“He is mine!” I put a little too much force behind it.
“Alright,” says Mic defensively.
“Would you like to see him?”
“Yes!” says Terra, Lams girl.
“Okay, Jakole!” I shout.
~Jakole, come to me.
~What about the door? I can open it, but will that be too suspicious?
~No, I can do magic.
~You really can, actually.
~Cool.


The door swung open and he walked in. Red and brown. Amazing. Beautiful. “This is Jakole, my wolf.”
Ooos and ahhs sounded around me as he walked around the table. “Wow, I never see nothin’ like him befo,” Georgia does not take her eyes off Jakole as she snuggles farther into Joey. Jakole comes over and puts his head into my lap. Absently, I stroke his head and in my head he groans in pleasure, burying his head farther into my lap.
He is a big wolf. If I was standing, I could touch his back without reaching down. A little taller than that, so I don’t blame Georgia for being scared, she is only two years old.
“His hair is the same color as the allusion,” Hether tells me.
“I was thinking about him.” It is true, you were talking to me.
~That I was.
“Well it is,” I look at my watch, “ten-thirty, I am going to bed.”
“Would you like to sleep in my room?” Mic offers.
“No, I’ll stay in my room.”
“But—” Mic tries to protest.
“No, it is your room, and I will not take it from you, and don’t tell anyone what I told you tonight.” I walk off toward my room with Jakole on my heels.
~What happened to your bed?
~Why do you think Mic offered his? I never had one. It’s okay with me; I only ever slept on a bed when I was over with Ryan because I was hurt.
~Oh, I usually sleep outside.
~That’s okay, if you want to sleep out there, go ahead, but if you want to sleep in here with me you can do that to.
~I think there is always a first time for everything.

Jakole nudges me into my room, and sits down in the middle. I close the door and join him, my brothers and their girls know better than to open a closed door most the time.
~So what’s up?

I ask; whenever I don’t know what to say I always ask that.
~You know.
~I always ask that when I don’t know what to say.
~Oh.
~So, how are you?
~I am better now. How are you?
~I’m OK. This really strange feeling is going on inside me though; I’ve never felt this way before.
~Me either.
~I’ve never felt this, this want.
~Never. I have never felt so alone, as I felt when you rejected me, or so alive, as I feel now.
~But what now?
~That is for the Goddess to answer.
~No, I mean right now.
~I see, I do not know.
~How about we talk about how you changed into a human?
~Once you accepted me I can do whatever you want or need me to do.
~Really?
~Yes.
~Cool, but can I turn into a wolf?
~I do not know. Why do you not try?
~How?
~Just think as hard as you can about you and a wolf at the same time, or think about you in my shape.
~Okay.

I bring up an image of me and an image of a big wolf in my mind and focus on bringing me into the wolf.
~Katya! Open your eyes!
~Wow!

As I look at myself I see a wolf, it is brown, the color of my hair, milk chocolate brown. I am almost as big as Jakole, I am beautiful.
~Katya, Sacaw Hasla, you did it.

Jakole’s voice in my head sounded proud. You look incredible,

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