The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, vol 15, Sir Richard Francis Burton [ereader that reads to you .txt] 📗

sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the King suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night, and that was

The Eight Hundred and Thirty-second Night, Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be not sleeping, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the father applied himself to safeguarding his wife and gave her a charge warning her with threats against his son and saying, “Whenas I wed ever a woman, yonder youth by his cunning manageth to have his wicked will of her.” Quoth she, “O Man, what be these words thou speakest? This thy son is a dog, nor hath he power to do with me aught, and I am a lady amongst women.” Quoth he, “Indeed I but charge thee to have a care of thyself.[FN#581] Haply I may hie me forth to wayfare and he will lay some deep plot for thee and work with thee as he wrought with others.” She replied, “O

Man, hold thyself secure therefrom for an he bespeak me with a single word I will slipper him with my papoosh;[FN#582] and her rejoined, “May safety be thine!” He cohabited with her for a month till one day of the days when he was compelled to travel; so he went in to his wife and cautioned her and was earnest with her saying, “Have a guard of thyself from my son the debauchee for ‘tis a froward fellow, a thief, a miserable, lest he come over thee with some wile and have his will of thee.” Said she, “What words are these? Thy son is a dog nor hath he any power over me in aught whereof thou talkest, and if he bespeak me with one injurious word, I will slipper him soundly with my foot-gear.”[FN#583] He rejoined, “If thou happen to need aught[FN#584]

never even mention it to him;” and she, “Hearkening and obedience.” So he farewelled her and fared forth wholly intent upon his wayfare. Now when he was far enough from the town the youth came to the grass-widow but would not address a single word to her, albeit fire was lighted in his heart by reason of her being so beautiful. Accordingly he contrived a wile. It happened to be summer-tide so he went[FN#585] to the house and repaired to the terrace-roof, and there he raised his clothes from his sitting-place and exposed his backside stark naked to the cooling breeze; then he leant forwards propped on either elbow and, spreading his hands upon the ground, perked up[FN#586] his bottom. His stepmother looked at him and marvelling much said in her mind, “Would Heaven I knew of this froward youth what may be his object!”[FN#587] However he never looked at her nor ever turned towards her but he abode quiet in the posture he had chosen. She stared hard at him and at last could no longer refrain from asking him, “Wherefore dost thou on this wise?” He answered, “And why not? I am doing that shall benefit me in the future, but what that is I will never tell thee; no, never.” She repeated her question again and again, and at last he replied, “I do thus when ‘tis summer-tide and a something of caloric entereth my belly through my backside and when ‘tis winter the same cometh forth and warmeth my body; and in the dog-days and keepeth me in heats like these, fresh and comfortable.”[FN#588] She asked, “An I do what thou doest, shall it be the same to me?” And he answered, “Aye.” Herewith she came forward beside him and raised her raiment from her behind till the half of her below the waist was stark naked;—And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased saying her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet and tasteful is thy tale, O sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night as the Sovran suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

The Eight Hundred and Thirty-third Night, Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the grass-widow came forward beside her stepson and raised her raiment from her behind until the half of her below the waist was stark naked; and she did even as her husband’s son had done, and perked up her buttocks, leaning heavily upon her knees and elbows. Now when she acted on this wise the youth addressed her saying, “Thou canst not do it aright.” “How so?” “Because the wind passing in through the postern passeth out through thy portal, thy solution of continuity.” “Then how shall I do?” “Stopper thy slit wherethrough the air passeth.” “How shall I stopper it?” “An thou stopper it not thy toil will be in vain.” “Dost thou know how to stopper it?” “Indeed I do!” “Then, rise up and stopper it.” Hearing these words he arose, because indeed he greeded for her, and came up behind her as she rested upon her elbows and knees and hending in hand his prickle nailed it into her coynte and did manly devoir. And after having his will of her he said, “Thou hast now done thy best for me and thy belly is filled full of the warm breeze.” On this wise he continued every day, enjoying the wife of his father for some time during his wayfare, till the traveller returned home, and on his entering the house the bride rose and greeted him and said, “Thou hast been absent overlong!”[FN#589] The man sat with her awhile and presently asked of her case for that he was fearful of his son; so she answered, “I am hale and hearty!” “Did my son ask thee of aught?”

“Nay, he asked me not, nor did he ever address me: withal, O Man, he hath admirable and excellent expedients and indeed he is deeply versed in natural philosophy.” “What expedients and what natural philosophy?” “He tucketh up his dress and exposeth his backside to the breeze which now passeth into his belly and benefiteth him throughout the cold season, and in winter he doeth exactly what he did in summer with effect as beneficial. And I also have done as he did.” Now when the husband heard these her words he knew that the youth had practised upon her and had enjoyed his desire of her; so he asked her, “And what was it thou diddest?” She answered, “I did even as he did. However the breeze would not at first enter into my belly for whatever passed through the back postern passed out of the front portal, and the youth said to me, ‘Stopper up thy solution of continuity.’ I asked him, ‘Dost thou know how to stopper it?’ and he answered, ‘Indeed I do!’ Then he arose and blocked it with his prickle; and every day I continued to do likewise and he to stopper up the peccant part with the wherewithal he hath.” All this was said to the husband who listened with his head bowed groundwards; but presently he raised it and cried, “There is no Majesty and there is no might save in Allah, the Glorious, the Great;” and suddenly as they were speaking on that subject the youth came in to them—

And Sharazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet is thy story, O sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the King suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was The Eight Hundred and Thirty-fourth Night, Dunyazad said to her, “Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be not sleeping, finish for us thy tale, that we may cut short the watching of this our latter night!” She replied, “With love and good will!” It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting, and of deeds fair-seeming and worth celebrating, that the youth came in to his father and found his stepmother relating to him all they had done whilst he was away and the man said to him, “Wherefore, O youth, hast thou acted on such wise?” Said the son, “What harm have I done? I only dammed the waterway that the warm air might abide in her belly and comfort her in the cold season.” So the father knew that his son had played this trick in order to have his will of her. Hereat he flew into a fury[FN#590] and forthright divorced her, giving her the contingent dowry; and she went her ways. Then the man said in his mind, “I shall never get the better of this boy until I marry two wives and ever keep them with each other, so that he may not cozen the twain.” Now after a couple of weeks he espoused a fair woman fairer than his former and during the next month he wived with a second and cohabited with the two brides. Then quoth the youth in his mind, “My papa hath wedded two perfect beauties and here am I abiding in single blessedness. By Allah, there is no help but that I play a prank upon both of them!” Then he fell to seeking a contrivance but he could not hit upon aught for that whenever he entered the house he found his two stepmothers sitting together and thus he could not avail to address either. But his father never fared forth from home or returned to it without warning his wives and saying, “Have a care of yourselves against that son of mine. He is a whoremonger and he hath made my life distraught, for whenever I take to myself a wife he serveth some sleight upon her; then he laugheth at her and so manageth that I must divorce her.” At such times the two wives would cry, “Wall�hi, an he come near us and ask us of amorous mercy, we will slap him with our slippers.”

Still the man would insist, saying, “Be ye on your guard against him,” and they would reply, “We are ever on our guard.” Now one day the women said to him, “O man, our wheat is finished,” and said he, “Be ye watchful while I fare to the Bazar in our market-town which lieth hard by and fetch you the corn.” So he left them and made for the town,—And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and fell silent and ceased saying her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad, “How sweet and tasteful is thy tale, O

sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!” Quoth she, “And where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the coming night an the Sovran suffer me to survive?” Now when it was the next night and that was

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