Howl, Brieanna Boyce [e ink ebook reader .TXT] 📗

when we first met I felt my smile turn heavily into a frown. It seemed that as soon as I became a werewolf he saw me as just another member of his stupid pack. Then I thought of Rayne how I’d just slaughtered a vampire would I ever consider doing the same to him?
“Where are we going again?”
“Oh right,” I smiled “I’m sorry, I live in the Kingston Apartments, in the Bronx. I’m kind of new.”
“You’re from the Bronx?” The boy said looking at me skeptically.
“Yeah, this dress isn’t even mine.”
“What’s in the bag?” The boy said jerking his head to the garbage bag.
“Clothes,” I responded easily.
“Well you’re lucky I know where that is I drive by the Kingston complex every time I go to work.”
He pulled up to the Kingston apartments and looked at me, “There you are.”
“Thank you so much I can’t tell you how grateful I am.”
“You could show me,” the boy winked.
I looked at him in disgust scoffed and got my bag storming out of the car. I then went into the apartment building and up a flight or two of steps then I went into the door marked B3 and sure enough there was Gerard sitting in a chair right in front of the door.
“I knew you were fine,” Gerard said apathetically “Kale nearly had a heart attack.”
“I’m fine sorry I worried you guys,” I really did feel pretty guilty and just when I started getting along with everyone too. Oh well it was my own fault.
“I don’t think you get it,” Gerard hissed cruelly getting up from his chair, “This pack is your family we are your home and you are not leaving. A command by Kale is a command is law. You’d do well to remember that.” He circled me as I often saw vultures circle their prey on discovery channel.
I couldn’t think of one word to say, or how to combat that I wanted to say that it was my choice where I went and what I did but I couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt. I could just imagine Kale looking tirelessly for me and putting the rest of the pack through hell for me. I rubbed my head flustered; I couldn’t tell him that I wouldn’t try to sneak off again because Kale was the last person I wanted to lie to. I had to sneak away to drink blood they would hate me.
Gerard fished his cell phone out of his pocket and dialed the number which was no doubt Kale’s and held it to his ear.
“Yep she’s here,” his eyes made contact with my arm I looked down and saw the bite I received on my arm from the vampire Antonio. “No she’s fine…She’s right here if you want to… oh alright then. Okay, bye.”
I covered the wound on my arm protectively glaring at Gerard.
“You should put on a sweatshirt or something to cover that up Kale would have a heart attack if he saw that.”
I nodded and went into me and Meg’s room rifling through the few clothes that I had in my backpack then I found a sweater that had belonged to my mother. It was pink; it was warm and smelled like the lilacs mom had religiously collected. It was not itchy or uncomfortable in fact it was made of Egyptian cotton and was soft and inviting. It still held some of mom’s bright, optimistic essence. I slid off the vampire’s shirt and replaced it with my mother’s sweater; it was too large for both me and mother. I remember asking her once why she had gotten it so big she responded that sometimes she just liked getting lost in it, and that an oversized sweatshirt was like a blanket you could wear.
At the time I hadn’t understood what she meant but now it was all too clear. It brought me back to my childhood and reminded me that although mother couldn’t be here physically that she would always be here spiritually. I took off my sweatpants and climbed into bed writing everything into my diary. It was addressed to my mother as if it was a letter because I believed it was a letter to mom. In fact I only started to use this diary the night mom had passed. I never dared to read that page again for fear of reliving the painful feelings of that night. In fact I never reread the things I wrote; they were just my thoughts and feelings of the day. I wanted her to be a part of my life and the lives of daddy and Adoni. Unfortunately, since my lives were separate theirs as of now I could no longer inform her of their happenings hopefully she could see it all regardless.
I wrote down the diary entry feeling an automatic release as soon as my pen hit the paper:
Dear Mommy,
How is heaven? It has been so long since I’ve seen you everything’s gone wrong and what I wish for more than anything is to go back in time and live life forever as we did before you died. I want to be a whole family again but I know that is a pointless and selfish wish. I’m sure you’re enjoying the treasures and gifts of heaven it just gets so hard when you aren’t here. Adoni has lost a lot of his playful fun-loving nature and he’s grown hard towards others, it scares me because he grows older each day both in spirit and physical appearance. Daddy scares me even more he isolates himself from everything and everyone, he is growing tired and bitter and he is no longer the father I had grown to love. I’m sorry I thought I could take care of everyone and fill your place, it was silly of me to bother no one could ever take your place. I just wanted to keep what remained of our family together. I’m sorry I failed you mom. Please watch over them because my life is too dangerous for Adoni and Dad to be involved in. Help them through these difficult times so that they will strive together.
Love from Your Daughter Always,
Skylar
I tried to hold back the tears but they welled up in my eyes. What would mom do if she was alive? Blame me? Hate me? Be disgusted and horrified? I was a monster now I killed and slaughtered, my world was consumed with blood I’m sure mom would be ashamed of me, she would look down on me from heaven and curse me to the fathomless, eternal pit of hell.
I heard the door open and buried my face into my pillow and continued to cry. I felt a large warm hand rubbing my upper back comfortingly.
“Don’t scare me like that again okay?” Kale had said it in a tone I had never heard, it sounded wounded and pained, vulnerable, nothing like I had expected.
I turned, lying on my back wiping my tears with my sweater, “Kale I’ll have to go out alone sometimes… It is nothing personal and it was not my intention to scare you… next time I’ll contact you okay?”
Kale surprised me by pulling me up and into his arms into an embrace I had not expected. I pat his head and hummed “The Dandelion song” as mom once sang to me as a lullaby. His grip loosened and he seemed to relax he pulled away from me and sat close.
“Why were you crying?” Kale said sounding concerned.
“My mom’s dead I write to her sometimes…”
“You write to your dead mother?” Kale chuckled, “I thought I had issues.”
“Hey!” I tried to keep a straight face but couldn’t help chuckling; I punched him playfully in the arm. “Mommy appreciates it very much,” I huffed.
“Mommy?!” Kale laughed to the point of tears and I laughed too.
“You’re a real jerk Kale,” I smiled up at him.
“Yeah but I’d rather be a jerk then a madwoman,” he grinned playfully, mischief lighting up his dark gold eyes so they shined in a way that would put treasure to shame. His grin spreading wide across his face, he took a nearby pillow and wacked me in the head with it. Then ran out of the room laughing, I grabbed the pillow and threw it out of the room after him. It hit him in the head but he ignored it, then I realized that the whole pack was staring. I smiled sheepishly and closed the door embarrassed. Perhaps I went too far, I hope I didn’t annoy Kale. I sighed and collapsed onto my bed, Mom I hate boys.
I closed my eyes and felt my body slacken as my mind became hazy, I guess I hadn’t been sleeping that well lately but I hadn’t noticed how tired I actually was. I tried to get my body to reach for the blanket but it would not obey my whole body had become lead. I was underwater sinking farther, farther, and farther into its deep blue abyss. My eyelids fluttered closed.
I was in the city, it was a full moon I knew it was New York City but the buildings were bleeding. Yes, bleeding, through the cracks and crevices, the windows, walls, and doors. I looked down at my hands and saw they were covered in blood. I looked up to the sky and there I saw Kale and Tristan.
Kale was warm rich colors, made up of hues of gold and tan looking like an angel. He was reaching out his hand for me smiling broadly as he always did when he smiled and mouthing my name.
I then looked up at Tristan he bent his index finger signing for me to go to him. He did not have the same appearance of warmth and comfort. In fact if Kale was burning brightly like fire then Tristan would be the distant and cold ice. He sat wearing a crown of red, his mouth open so that bloody fangs were exposed.
I fell to my knees and buried my face into my hands, I felt torn in two, I felt guilty and although I loved Tristan I hesitated joining him. Usually I would run right to his side but he didn’t look anything like the Tristan I had fallen for. He looked empty and cold as blank as snow. I saw Kale and him fading I stood unable to choose.
Unlike most times I wake up I simply awoke, usually I have to fight through layers of grogginess. I looked to the clock nearby and saw that it had read 3am. I sighed in frustration my sleeping patterns really sucked lately, I threw off my blankets and walked out of the apartment room and up more flights of stairs to the roof and sat there for a long time. I heard the birds begin their melodic chirping as the sky began to brighten, a medley of sound and color splaying wide open as a book. Also like a book I found that the beautiful sky, bright yellow with hints of red and orange at the horizon, and the bird’s songs and melodies had a hidden message a theme if you will. No matter how dark was the night before, or how bad of a dream you had, or even a bad experience that it would not last forever, there would be a sunrise. It may not be as beautiful as this one, it may not be as colorful or the birds may not sing as vibrantly, the sunrise may even be late or dark. But the sun will rise, the sun will come.
I felt somewhat at peace I couldn’t tell you how long I’d been on that roof staring at the sunrise. I