In Me, Tiffany Anyel [good books for 8th graders TXT] 📗
- Author: Tiffany Anyel
Book online «In Me, Tiffany Anyel [good books for 8th graders TXT] 📗». Author Tiffany Anyel
Looking up at me as I came into the room he lets out an 'exaggerated' sigh, “About time--what were you doing in there?”
And instead of answering I surprise myself saying, “How do you really feel about me Lee?”
The Passion in me
Surprised at my response he stares at me,“What? What do you mean?”
“I mean--how-do-you-really-feel-about-me?” I say enunciating every word as I said it. “Kate what is this about?” “Can’t you just answer the question!?”
“You know how I feel about you! You’re my best friend! Hello--it’s me Lee you’re talking to.”
And feeling my anger rise--I spat, “Cut the crap! You know what I mean Lee! Hello
--it’s me Kate you’re talking to. I know when you’re dodging a question!”
“I don’t know--what do you want me to say!?” “Dammit Lee--I’m asking you!”
Hearing a knock we both turn our heads. “Kate? Is everything okay?” Realizing it was Paul--and he had over-heard us shouting I clear my throat saying, “Yea I’m okay.”
“Well can I come in?” “No!” Lee spat shouting at the door. Shocked I turn looking at Lee.
“Umm…Kate?” Paul finally said obviously taken aback that he heard Lee shouting. And without warning Lee gets up opening the door, “What do you want?”
Ignoring Lee Paul peeks over his shoulder looking at me, “Are you okay?” “She just told you she was! So why don’t you just go bother someone else?!”
Still shocked that Lee was talking to Paul--like he was. I gain my footing walking up to the door smiling at Paul--trying to buffer the obvious tension between them as they both stood facing each other.
“Paul really I’m okay--me and Lee were just having a spat is all. We’re okay though.” And turning to me with fire in his eyes Lee responds, “Oh so now--we’re okay?”
Ignoring Lee I look at Paul, “I’ll come to you--later okay?” And before Paul could respond Lee looks at me, “Like hell you will.”
“Don’t talk to her like that!” Paul spat shouting at Lee. “I don’t know how you normally talk to her--but you will not
talk to my girlfriend that way in front me--or ever!”
“Your girlfriend huh?” “Yea--why you jealous?” “Okay guys that’s enough!” I say stepping in-between them.
Lee walks away--sitting on my bed. I turn to Paul, “Really Paul it’s okay,” I say looking him in the eyes. “Are you sure?” “Yes I’m sure.” “Just go away already!” Lee said sounding annoyed as he sat on the bed.
Rolling his eyes--ignoring him Paul looks at me, “Okay well I’ll see you later then?” “Yes.” “Okay. Can I have a kiss before I go?”
Feeling Lee’s eyes on my back--I smile at Paul, “Right now—I don’t know if that is such a good id--“ And before I knew it he was kissing me on the mouth.
Feeling someone yank me off I look up and see Lee glaring at Paul, “Don’t do that again--do you hear me? If she doesn’t want you kissing her--you better not put your fucking
hands on her. Got that?” Lee finally said slamming the door in Paul’s face.
“What was that?!” I finally said once I came back from utter shock. Lee rolls his eyes--not responding. “Lee!” “What?!” “What the hell was that?!”
“He shouldn’t have kissed you Kate! He better be glad all I did is slam the door in his fucking face.” Lee said staring at the floor.
I couldn't believe this was happening--no. I couldn't believe Lee. I have never seen him so...so... I dunno--angry
. Did my question upset him this much??
“Lee?” I finally said--trying to sound as calm as I could. “What?” I walk over standing in front of him. “Lee look at me.” He lets out a sigh looking up at me.
“What is this really about--is it just about Paul? Or something else?”
“I don’t know--I just didn’t like that asshole putting his hands on you.” “Why Lee?” “I’ve already told you why!”
I slowly take his hand running it down my stomach, “Is it because you’d rather put your hands on me?” I say holding his gaze.
Swallowing he doesn’t respond--but he doesn’t move his hand away either.
I take his hand lightly lifting my shirt just above my belly button holding it there--slowly gliding his hand across my belly, “Do you like the way I feel Lee?”
“You know I do.” He finally said looking at me. And hearing him say that--ignited something within me. Somewhere low I had started to burn. I instinctively close my eyes letting out a breath--letting him touch me. Feeling him touch me.
I drop my hand from his--silently hoping he wouldn't stop. He doesn't. Still feeling him there as he slowly glides his hand over my belly.
Still touching me, still feeling me. I let out faint silent moans as I feel him lightly kissing my belly with his lips.
He didn’t go any further than where I had placed his hand--but he didn’t have to I was silently on fire.
“What are we doing Kate?” He finally said letting out a sigh turning his head--resting it on my belly. I open my eyes looking down at him--I couldn’t see his face. But I didn’t have to--I already knew his expression.
He finally looked up at me, “What are we doing?”
“I don’t know. But…I want you Lee. I can’t help that I do. I don’t think I can pretend anymore--that I don’t…want you.” I finally said desire plainly written on my face as I stood there breathing heavy--feeling hot-steamy tingling below.
“I want you too Kate. You have no idea how much…I want you. But what about everything else?”
“What do you mean?” “Well our significant others--for starters.” He says letting out a faint chuckle.
What about them? I hadn't thought about them--or anything else for that matter--the moment he touched me.
“And what about our friendship?..." Lee finally said after I didn't respond--more like couldn't.
He continues by saying, "I don’t want to lose you Kate. No matter how much I want you--and god
do I want you. If it meant losing you…I just don’t know if I could handle that. One night of…being with you--no matter how beyond amazing
I know it would be--would not make up for a life-time of sadness--if you weren’t in my life Kate.”
Finally letting out a sigh of my own I run my fingers through his hair bringing his head to my belly--holding him. “I know Lee--I don’t want that either. You not being in my life… Well it’s not an option for me either. Just having you gone these last few weeks has been torture--I know I couldn’t go a life-time without you.”
He looks up at me putting his hands on top of mine as they held the sides of his face. “So what do we do?”
And looking deep in his eyes I respond, “We love each other Lee--that’s what we do. As long as we always remember to love each other--we’ll be okay. No matter what happens between us.”
“I do love you Kate--even when I first met you--I loved you. In your old beat-up car as you tried to run me off the road.” “I did not!”
Laughing he raises my shirt lightly kissing my belly button, “And I love you now.”
“Don’t do that.” I say feeling my body ignite all over again. “Don’t do what? This…” He kisses my belly again and looks up at me smiling. And letting out a silent breath I respond, “Yes that.”
He lets out a laugh meeting my eyes, “You are so beautiful to me. And although I didn't know it at the time...you have always been beautiful to me Kate. 'My Kate'--the one who 'always
has something to say'--even when she knows I don't want to hear it. And who can make me furious beyond words--but somehow still pull off charming and sweet...only you can do that.” He finally said letting out a chuckle.
I let out a sigh looking away. “What?” And looking back at him I respond, “I still…want you Lee. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted something so much in my life--and I can’t…”
I let out a breath looking down. “You can’t what?” “I can’t go on…in my life silently wanting something to happen between us. I’ve never felt…how I feel with you--with anyone else. And knowing that--makes me want you even more.”
And finally rendering up the courage I look at him, “Will you…be with me Lee? As my friend…will you show me what loving you feels like?”
He looks down--and after what felt like forever, he finally looks up at me running his fingers through his hair, “Damn Kate why do you have to ask me something like that?”
“What--you can show Jenn but you can’t show me?” I finally spat feeling myself tremble with anger—silently hurting.
“Kate this has nothing to do with Jenn.” “Obviously it does Lee--just go. Leave me alone.” “Kate--stop.” “No you stop--just go Lee now!” I turn away--not looking back slamming the bathroom door.
Last day here.
I had woke up on the bathroom floor--body aching, still tired. I hadn't meant to fall asleep, but I couldn’t bring myself to open the door. Afraid that I would still find Lee there on my bed.
I just couldn’t bring myself to face him. I was too ashamed, too hurt, too… upset with myself. Thankful that no one found me there—on the floor this morning. I had got up and started packing my bags.
It felt like I had been stuffing clothes and everything else into my suitcase all morning--and here I was still stuffing. Oh well it gave me something to do—and to be honest
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