A Kiss From The Golden Buddha, M. J. Wolper [good e books to read txt] 📗

The restaurant was Southern Indian, which is very spicy I was already happy about our choice. Our waiter was a very handsome young man with very fine manners which at first put Beth and myself off but people are very resilient when they are being treated better than they expected. We ordered almost everything on the menu. The stress of our adventure must have begun to take effect.


Through out my life food has been my great solace through sadness, loss, happiness and most importantly stress. “I guess we are both stressed out?’’ I said, “I am able to re channel my stress ” Beth said. This I understood to say, “who me stressed?” So I quickly changed the subject.

After dinner we wondered down streets with no idea where we were going. This day went like a dream it made no sense and yet it was leading me somewhere. We found ourselves at Rocco’s and chose a selection of mini pastries. Both of us wanted to delay our goodbyes. Finally Beth said, “Where do you live?” I live with my brother uptown. “How funny” she said Upper Westside by any chance?” “Yes” I said amazed. “We can travel together.” “Yes we should do that,” I said. “You know” Beth said, “I never asked you what you do for a living.” “That’s becoming a what’s your politics kind of question anymore “ “That bad” Beth said laughing. “Worse” I said. “Don’t look at me for condemnation” Beth said with a smile “Your talking to someone who just spent 6 hours handing out coffee samples.” I smiled because my last job was handing out bags at the Javits Center. “You and I are in the same boat,” I said. “I use these jobs to practice different characters “ “Today I was a Southerner and a Bostonenian.” “That sounds like fun” I said “Yes it beats just standing around looking at my watch” “ Mostly I just act enthusiastic” Beth is laughing uncontrollably now. I can’t help but join her because I finally got her joke. “What is it I once heard?” I said, “Oh yeh more than half of success is showing up”.” I subscribe to that theory” What do you, mean? “Well you never know most of life is luck”. You have to be in it to win it as they say”. If you don’t show up you won’t get the job or opportunity.” “ “Yes your right” Beth said very seriously “ I know too many people who got jobs because they were the first one or last one to show up” It seems so unfair” “ Life seems unfair” I said. Why are some people rich and others poor? “Why do small children get sick and some people live to 100?” “Why?” Beth asks me with a big grin on her face. “ Ok “I say, “It’s a childish question”. “I remember asking my mother and her telling me “Life is NOT fare” “I never got over her answer “ I said “Ever after all my certainties were taken away” Anything could happen to anyone for no reason” It was life changing” Beth looked at me long and hard. “ “I hate certainties” she said, “Life would be dull if you knew what would happen next” “We would never have met” How terrible would that have been?” she said with another grin on her face. I smiled back at her understanding that she wanted me to appreciate our chance meeting as the gift it was. “ You live with your brother? She suddenly asked, “Yes” I say, “ I had a roommate but she is going home for the summer” It’s a draw back living between two colleges.”” My roommates almost always are students and want to pack up and travel for the summers.’ “This leaves me tight for 3 months.” “I try to save up for these lean months like the ancient Egyptians but it’s still too close.” “Beth” I say to her “You don’t know me”. “I could be a nut”. “I know you are a nut” she says laughing, “ You’re my kind of nut” “ I am not rich in money but god has been kind to me.” “I always know who’s who” “ I could tell you stories of the many times it’s saved my life”. I am thinking about my brother and how I know he wishes I would disappear. He is so disappointed in me I know he started to hate me. I have been aware of this but too scared to face it. For the last year things have gotten worse. I lay awake and think of how I will kill myself.


My days have become a prison sentence. What’s worse being hated or hating yourself? I understand now how tired I am of beating myself up for things that don’t matter. This day has offered me a lifeline and I’m going to take it. “Ok “I said to Beth and smiled. Imprint

Publication Date: 07-21-2011

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