He Knew He Was Right, Anthony Trollope [children's ebooks free online .TXT] 📗
- Author: Anthony Trollope
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evident as the affairs of the evening went on, that Mrs Stanbury had
for a few minutes been thrown into a terrible state of amazement,
thinking that ‘the Colonel’ had appeared. The strange gentleman,
however, having obtained admittance, explained who he was, saying that
he was very desirous of seeing Mrs Trevelyan and Miss Rowley. It may be
presumed that a glimmer of light did make its way into Mrs Stanbury’s
mind on the subject; but up to the moment at which the three travellers
arrived, she had been in doubt on the subject. Mr Glascock had declared
that he would take a walk, and in the course of the afternoon had
expressed high approval of Mrs Crocket’s culinary skill. When Mrs
Crocket heard that she had entertained the son of a lord, she was very
loud in her praise of the manner in which he had eaten two mutton chops
and called for a third. He had thought it no disgrace to apply himself
to the second half of an apple pie, and had professed himself to be an
ardent admirer of Devonshire cream. ‘It’s them counter-skippers as
turns up their little noses at the victuals as is set before them,’
said Mrs Crocket.
After his dinner Mr Glascock had returned to the Clock House, and had
been sitting there for an hour with Mrs Stanbury, not much to her
delight or to his, when the carriage was driven up to the door.
‘He is to go back to Lessboro’ tonight,’ said Mrs Stanbury in a
whisper.
‘Of course you must see him before he goes,’ said Mrs Trevelyan to her
sister. There had, as was natural, been very much said between the two
sisters about Mr Glascock. Nora had abstained from asserting in any
decided way that she disliked the man, and had always absolutely
refused to allow Hugh Stanbury’s name to be mixed up with the question.
‘Whatever might be her own thoughts about Hugh Stanbury she had kept
them even from her sister. ‘When her sister had told her that she had
refused Mr Glascock because of Hugh, she had shown herself to be
indignant, and had since that said one or two fine things as to her
capacity to refuse a brilliant offer simply because the man who made it
was indifferent to her. Mrs Trevelyan had learned from her that her
Suitor had declared his intention to persevere; and here was
perseverance with a vengeance! ‘Of course you must see him at once,’
said Mrs Trevelyan. Nora for a few seconds had remained silent, and
then had run up to her room. Her sister followed her instantly.
‘What is the meaning of it all?’ said Priscilla to her mother.
‘I suppose he is in love with Miss Rowley,’ said Mrs Stanbury.
‘But who is he?’
Then Mrs Stanbury told all that she knew, She had seen from his card
that he was an Honourable Mr Glascock. She had collected from what he
had said that he was an old friend of the two ladies. Her conviction
was strong in Mr Glascock’s favour thinking, as she expressed herself,
that everything was right and proper but she could hardly explain why
she thought so.
‘I do wish that they had never come,’ said Priscilla, who could not rid
herself of an idea that there must be danger in having to do with women
who had men running after them.
‘Of course I’ll see him,’ said Nora to her sister. ‘I have not refused
to see him. Why do you scold me?’
‘I have not scolded you, Nora; but I do want you to how immensely
important this is.’
‘Of course it is important.’
‘And so much the more so because of my misfortunes! Think how good he
must be, how strong must be his attachment, when he comes down here
after you in this way.’
‘But I have to think of my own feelings.’
‘You know you like him. You have told me so. And only fancy what mamma
will feel! Such a position! And the man so excellent! Everybody says
that he hasn’t a fault in any way.’
‘I hate people without faults.’
‘Oh, Nora, Nora, that is foolish! There, there; you must go down. Pray
pray do not let any absurd fancy stand in your way, and destroy
everything. It will never come again, Nora. And, only think; it is all
now your own if you will only whisper one word.’
‘Ah! one word and that a falsehood!’
‘No no. Say you will try to love him, and that will enough. And you do
love him?’
‘Do I?’
‘Yes, you do. It is only the opposition of your nature that makes you
fight against him. Will you go now?’
‘Let me be for two minutes by myself,’ said Nora, ‘and then I’ll come
down. Tell him that I’m coming.’ Mrs Trevelyan stooped over her, kissed
her, and then left her.
Nora, as soon as she was alone, stood upright in the middle of the room
and held her hands up to her forehead. She had been far from thinking,
when she was considering the matter easily among the hillocks, that the
necessity for an absolute decision would come upon her so
instantaneously. She had told herself only this morning that it would
be wise to accept the man, if he should ever ask a second time and he
had come already. He had been waiting for her in the village while she
had been thinking whether he would ever come across her path again. She
thought that it would have been easier for her now to have gone down
with a ‘yes’ in her mouth, if her sister had not pressed her so hard to
say that ‘yes,’ The very pressure from her sister seemed to imply that
such pressure ought to be resisted. Why should there have been
pressure, unless there were reasons against her marrying him? And yet,
if she chose to take him, who would have a right to complain of her?
Hugh Stanbury had never spoken to her a word that would justify her in
even supposing that he would consider himself to be illused. All
others of her friends would certainly rejoice, would applaud her, pat
her on the back, cover her with caresses, and tell her that she had
been born under a happy star. And she did like the man. Nay she thought
she loved him. She withdrew her hands from her brow, assured herself
that her lot in life was cast, and with hurrying fingers attempted to
smooth her hair and to arrange her ribbons before the glass. She would
go to the encounter boldly and accept him honestly. It was her duty to
do so. What might she not do for brothers and sisters as the wife of
Lord Peterborough of Monkhams? She saw that that arrangement before the
glass could be of no service, and she stepped quickly to the door. If
he did not like her as she was, he need not ask her. Her mind was made
up, and she would do it. But as she went down the stairs to the room in
which she knew that he was waiting for her, there came over her a cold
feeling of self-accusation almost of disgrace. ‘I do not care,’ she
said. ‘I know that I’m right.’ She opened the door quickly, that there
might be no further doubt, and found that she was alone with him.
‘Miss Rowley,’ he said, ‘I am afraid you will think that I am
persecuting you.’
‘I have no right to think that,’ she answered.
‘I’ll tell you why I have come. My dear father, who has always been my
best friend, is very ill. He is at Naples, and I must go to him. He is
very old, you know over eighty; and will never live to come back to
England. From what I hear, I think it probable that I may remain with
him till everything is over.’
‘I did not know that he was so old as that.’
‘They say that he can hardly live above a month or two. He will never
see my wife if I can have a wife; but I should like to tell him, if it
were possible that—’
‘I understand you, Mr Glascock.’
‘I told you that I should come to you again, and as I may possibly
linger at Naples all the winter, I could not go without seeing you.
Miss Rowley, may I hope that you can love me?’
She did not answer him a word, but stood looking away from him with her
hands clasped together. Had he asked her whether she would be his wife,
it is possible that the answer which she had prepared would have been
spoken. But he had put the question in another form. Did she love him?
If she could only bring herself to say that she could love him, she
might be lady of Monkhams before the next summer had come round.
‘Nora,’ he said, ‘do you think that you can love me?’
‘No,’ she said, and there was something almost of fierceness in the
tone of her voice as she answered him.
‘And must that be your final answer to me?’
‘Mr Glascock, what can I say?’ she replied. ‘I will tell you the honest
truth—I will tell you everything. I came into this room determined to
accept you. But you are so good, and so kind, and so upright, that I
cannot tell you a falsehood. I do not love you. I ought not to take
what you offer me. If I did, it would be because you are rich, and a
lord; and not because I love you. I love some one else. There pray,
pray do not tell of me; but I do.’ Then she flung away from him and hid
her face in a corner of the sofa out of the light.
Her lover stood silent, not knowing how to go on with the conversation,
not knowing how to bring it to an end. After what she had now said to
him it was impossible that he should press her further. It was almost
impossible that he should wish to do so. When a lady is frank enough to
declare that her heart is not her own to give, a man can hardly wish to
make further prayer for the gift. ‘If so,’ he said, ‘of course I have
nothing to hope.’
She was sobbing, and could not answer him. She was half repentant,
partly proud of what she had done half repentant in that she had lost
what had seemed to her to be so good, and full of remorse in that she
had so unnecessarily told her secret.
‘Perhaps,’ said he, ‘I ought to assure you that what you have told me
shall never be repeated by my lips.’
She thanked him for this by a motion of her head and hand, not by words
and then he was gone. How he managed to bid adieu to Mrs Stanbury and
her sister, or whether he saw them as he left the house, she never
knew. In her corner of the sofa, weeping in the dark, partly proud and
partly repentant, she remained till her sister came to her. ‘Emily,’
she said, jumping up, ‘say nothing about it; not a word. It is of no
use. The thing is done and over, and let it altogether be forgotten.’
‘It is done and over, certainly,’ said Mrs Trevelyan.
‘Exactly; and I suppose a girl may do what she likes with herself in
that way.
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