Journey, Jay T. [ebook reader macos TXT] 📗

answer. Sitting up, I realize that he was gone. It feels like a dream. I was back in my room at home. I don’t know what’s going on. Darren was a dream? My modeling career and David and Chase and…
What on earth is going on?
Maria comes in and has a look of sadness on her face. She gasps when she sees me.
“Miss! What are you doing here? When did you get home?” I look at her questioningly and don’t answer. I look at my hand for the ring, and it’s still there, but why was I at home? I feel the pressure.
“We want to see you go back to your old life, knowing what you know. It might just be temporary and it might be permanent. After this, you might go back to your life in New York, or you may stay and everyone in New York will remember nothing about you. No one will be looking for you at the time being. They will think that you are on a trip. The people in your old life will remember everything, if you choose to stay. If you choose to go, they will remember nothing about you coming back. They will think that you are still missing. Do well.” The pressure and the voice leave and I look at the calendar. It’s October 7th; it’s the day after Darren asked me for the promise.
I want to call Darren, but I guess I’m not allowed to. I look at Maria, and she runs and calls my mother. I sit there still confused and my mother comes running in. My head snaps up at the sound of her voice. She looks like a walking skeleton. My mother comes in and hugs me.
“Mae! Mae, I’ve missed you.” I hug her back and she sees the confused look on my face. “Mae, where did you go? Why did you run away?” I look at her and refuse to answer. She keeps hounding me with questions and I look away.
I go to school, and everyone looks at me like they’ve seen a ghost. I see Chance and Lia, though, they do not see me. They hear people gasp and look around for the source of the surprise. I ignore their eyes and Kierra stops talking to look at me. No emotion shows on my face and everyone could tell that something about me has indeed changed. Everything has changed. I look down at my schedule and sigh. I go to history, and learn that Daisy had taught me everything.
I went through the day and at lunch my father came to see me. He made a huge scene and I stayed emotionless. He laughed and smiled, as if nothing was wrong.
“Dad,” I look at him, “Can we go somewhere to talk?”
“Sure.” He smiles and takes me out to a restaurant. We order and I don’t speak for a while.
“Dad, I know.”
“I know.”
“Why?”
“It just didn’t work out. We were always apart from each other. Lucy was always near me.” Lucy Anderson is his assistant. “She loves me.”
“So does mom.” I got up and I left. He didn’t chase after me like I thought he would have. He just sat there and watched me walk away. I sighed and sat on a park bench. I wasn’t ready to go back to school. My mind ran through all the possibilities of what could happen if I stayed here. There’s no reason to. The only reasons were because of my mom and Maria. My dad, as far as I could tell, was far gone from my life.
I closed my eyes and looked for Darren.
He was smiling and talking about me. He was with his friends again. I smiled and his friends seemed genuinely happy to have him have me. There was a girl, though; I saw her staring at him. She looked as though she wanted to go up to him and kiss him.
“Look, there’s Rachel.” One of Darren’s friends says.
He looks over at her and smiles and waves. She looks away quickly and continues walking. “She seems happy.”
‘Are you kidding me? She looked miserable.’ I thought which is the same thing his other friend said.
“Well, that’s her life, and there’s no me. I have Mae, and I’m happy, which should make her happy. That’s what she told me to be, and I am.” He shrugs and smiles.
I open my eyes, and walk back to school.
I sigh and walk into the next class that I had and sit down. There were ten minutes before class had started, and I sat there looking at my phone. I get a call from Darren, and I answer. I hope to the heavens that I don’t get in trouble for this.
“Hello?” I say.
“Mae! How’s your trip? Did you get there safely?” He asks.
“Yeah, everything went well. I’m just glad to hear your voice.” I tell him.
“I miss you. Come back soon, okay?” He sighs and I sigh along with him.
“I honestly don’t know how long this trip will take, but I’ll be back as soon as I can.” I tell him I love him and hang up. I look to see most of the people I’ve known since kindergarten staring at me as if I was an alien. Lia walks into the class with Kierra and Chance on her toes. They stop dead when they see me. I give them no emotion. Since I have chosen to sit in the back, they all go towards the front of the class. Somehow, I feel relief wash over me. I want nothing to do with them. The class starts and everything is like review for me. I sigh and look out the window. The teachers and students seem scared of me. That gave me a chance to avoid all their eyes. I can see why they seem that way. It looks like I’ve joined some type of gang, with my emotionless face, dark clothing, and dark brown, close to black, hair. In New York, I dyed my hair darker as well, because David said that it would make my skin stand out. I have my natural medium brown hair as my base color, but for the most part, my hair is really dark brown. I have on my leather combat boots, and my motorcycle jacket. Everything about me, right now, screams ‘REBEL’.
The day is almost over, and not one person has said hello to me. There’s sadness in that, but it quickly escapes when I feel pressure while looking in the mirror in the bathroom.
“Mae, you have done well. You will not get in trouble for taking the phone call from Darren. You have to maintain both covers, and that means making everyone in New York think that you are on a extended trip.” I smile and thank the voice.
The pressure is gone, but I hear footsteps coming into the bathroom, so I quickly go into the stalls.
“I can’t believe she’s back.” Lia’s voice fills up the room.
“Yeah, I wonder what she was doing. She was gone for almost three months.” Kierra’s voice follows.
“She…do you think she knows?” Lia asks.
“Do I think she knows about you and Chance? Honey, even if she didn’t, someone is going to tell her or she will find out soon enough anyway. Plus, I don’t think she wants to be near any of us. Have you seen her? She’s been…distant and…something has changed her.” Kierra said.
“I miss her.” Lia whispers.
“Honey, she was your best friend. When your best friend suddenly disappears and doesn’t tell anyone where she’s going, then shows up one day at school…I would want to talk to her. I would want to know what happened to her.” The start to leave, and that’s when I decided to stop hiding. I come out of the stall and they turn and stare at me in shock. I give them the same emotionless look I’ve given everyone all day, wash my hands and leave.
“Mae!” Lia runs after me and grabs my arm, but I yank her off and continue walking. I honestly don’t care about her relationship with Chance, I just don’t want to talk about it when a hundred peers are watching. I walk and since the day was over for me, I leave the school and walk to a place behind the school and in the forest that I’ve actually missed. It was the place where I would go to think. There was no internet, no phone service, nothing. It gave me a sense of peace. No one knew about it but me. I sit there staring at a little pond. The sun reflected off of the surface of the water. I think about New York and Darren. I think about David, about the hotel, about the first night in the hotel. I think about that night I lost my virginity, and I smile, suddenly wanting to leave Virginia and go back to Darren, no matter the consequences.
“I haven’t seen you smile all day.” A voice comes barging into my thoughts. My smile vanishes and I stare at the figure across from me in the pond. Chance smiles and looks at me sadly. “You know, you look gorgeous. All the guys have been telling me all day. They told me you look like a model…more than before.” I stare blankly at him. He scratches his head slightly, and sighs. “Look Mae, I know you know. I know you know about me and Lia. I understand that you’re angry. I understand all your feelings. I understand—Mae, are you even listening?”
“Yes. I am. I just don’t understand what you’re saying. I don’t understand the things you are telling me. Tell me, how could you possibly know my feelings? How? You’ve never been cheated on, your first official girlfriend was me, and I never cheated on you. You don’t understand my feelings.” I say.
“Maybe I might if you would just talk to me a little. Tell me how you knew. Tell me everything. You weren’t only Lia’s best friend, but you were mine too. You didn’t have to be dramatic and run away from your problems.” He says.
“Now I know you don’t understand. You cannot possibly understand how sick I am of this place. You cannot possibly know how a person feels when they find out that their best friend and boyfriend are cheating behind her back. You cannot know the sick feeling I feel when I see the both of you. You cannot know the feelings I feel when I come back and see that everything is the way I left it; everything is broken and corrupt. I want to go back home and leave all these feelings behind, but how can that happen when I know there’s unfinished business here?” I sigh and feel tears sneak out of my eyes. I look at Chance and see the hurt in his eyes. I get up and start to leave. I walk past Chance, and he stops me. He pulls me in and hugs me tightly while I just stand there unmoving. He cries into my shoulder and it takes all of my will not to cry into his. We stand there for a long while, when I finally pull Chance off of me.
“Don’t look for me again. I am not angry at you or Lia; I am disappointed and hurt. I didn’t run away to be dramatic. If you truly understood me, you would understand that I cannot tell you why. I want to be far from here, and hopefully I will be again soon. Please don’t be hurt by anything I do, and