Overcoming Circumstances, Belinda Slider-Baker [reading eggs books .txt] 📗
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- Author: Belinda Slider-Baker
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“Coor, one day you need to tear down your walls you have built up so high around you. You need to love.”
“I do love Bly, I love you and Marissa. I get enough love on the side too.” He said laughing.
“What if you had to grow up Coor?”
“What is that supposed to mean?” He asked in a very curious voice.
“One day you will have to grow up and take responsibility for your life and actions.”
“Where in the hell is this all coming from, Bly?”
“Nothing, never mind.” I snapped back.
“No, you started this conversation now tell me what you mean by that.”
“If a woman told you she was pregnant, and you were going to be a father, what would you do?”
“It doesn’t matter, Bly. It will never happen.”
“Humor me Coor, what would you do?”
“Depends what the woman wanted. I guess if she wanted child support I would send money, if she wanted to give the baby up for adoption, I would really be for that. I will never hurt a child like I was hurt. I don’t know how to be a dad. I am damaged. I will not damage a child. I will not raise a child and be forced to stay with the mother out of obligation. I am not an old fashioned kind of guy. This is just a hard question to answer Bly.” He said in a very confused yet pissed off voice.
“Wow, I can’t believe what I just heard from you.” I said back to him.
“You said you wanted me to be honest and when I am, you don’t like my answer, Bly?” He said.
“Sorry, I am just tired and was curious about what you would do. I will not judge you. I just have so many things running through my mind.”
“Well, Bly, I am going to go to bed. I am tired and have to head back to Ohio in the morning. I will make you breakfast in the morning.”
“Okay, goodnight and see you in the morning.”
I debated all night whether or not to tell Cooryn the truth about the baby. I knew he deserved to know, yet I knew he didn’t want a child or me for that matter. He liked being a bachelor. For now, I would respect that. When I went down for breakfast, Cooryn was just about done with it. He had the table set and everything. We ate and just talked about random things. All of a sudden Braelyn kicked me really hard. I sort of grabbed my stomach. Coor jumped up and asked if everything was okay. I told him everything was fine. The baby was just being very active this morning. Finally something came over me.
“Coor, can I ask you something?”
“Yes, Bly, you know you can ask me anything,”
“What would you do if the baby I was carrying was yours?”
“Bly, why would you even ask me a question like that? Damnit, that isn’t funny. You know that would ruin everything between us. Why are you so fixated on this? Do you think since Marissa is married and has a daughter and now you are going to have a baby with Thane, I need to be with someone?”
“No, it is a question, answer it.”
“Bly, it would be hard to answer. You wouldn’t like my answer. I guess I would give you money and keep our friendship the way it is. I would never jeopardize our friendship. Our friendship means too much to me. We almost lost our friendship in high school, I won’t do that again. Then when your granny died grief hit us both. I apologized for that. Being drunk isn’t an excuse. I would like you to be happy. You have always wanted a family. I wouldn’t want to ruin that for you by accidentally getting you knocked up.”
As he finished, I had tears streaming down my face. Coor hugged me.
“See, I told you I didn’t want to answer that stupid question. It would only hurt you.”
“Coor you have made it perfectly clear how you feel about marriage and children. I guess I needed to hear you see it out loud.”
“I gotta go Bly.”
“Okay, Coor, have a safe trip home. Call or text me when you get back to Cincinnati.”
“I love you Bly, you do know that, right?”
“Yes, and I love you too!”
“I really hate you asking those questions. You seemed really disappointed with my answers. I am happy for Bly. I am really happy. I don’t need a complication like a baby or a woman tying me down for life. It just isn’t me.”
“Coor.”
“Yeah, Bly.”
As pointed to my belly, I said:
“The baby in here, she belongs to you!”
“What in the hell are you talking about?”
“After Granny’s funeral, it happened then, Coor.”
“This baby is Thane’s; he came to Greenville when I called him. You didn’t tell me then. How do you know that it isn’t his? It could be either one of ours, Bly. Don’t do this to me.”
“The first time I ever slept with Thane was in Greenville that night, Coor.”
Cooryn’s face went pale.
“How could you do this to me, Bly? How?”
“How could I do this to you? It took two people to have sex. As I recall you were enjoying yourself just as much as I was. I am sorry that I didn’t think about a condom. I was in shock over just burying the only woman who wanted me when everyone else walked out of my life whenever I needed them the most. I couldn’t take birth control. I had cancer dammit.”
“What do you want from me, Bly? I know it takes two to have sex. I forgot that you were not on birth control pills. I just remember you used to take them in high school. I totally forgot you couldn’t take them after you battled ovarian cancer. I am sorry.”
“I don’t want a damn thing from you. I want you to remain my best friend. I want to raise my daughter. Thane wants to raise her too. Do you have a problem with that?”
“If Thane wants to be a father, I think that is for the best for everyone involved.”
“Are you sure Coor?”
“Yes, I am sure, Bly.”
“I just had to tell you the truth. I knew how you felt from all of our previous conversations about marriage and children. I was upset and needed to just get it out in the open. I didn’t mean to keep it from you or hurt you.”
“I gotta go to Bly, until next time, I love and will miss you.”
“Until next time, I love and will miss you too.”
He left, and I felt like he took a knife and stabbed me in the heart. I needed to call and talk to Thane.
It was the last week of May. I have approximately 7 weeks left until I can meet Braelyn. Marissa and her family were up last month and had a wonderful time. Marissa is still very upset with Cooryn. Yet, Marissa is happy that Thane will get to be a dad.
I was doing laundry, because Thane had a business meeting and wouldn’t be stopping by until later that evening. My laundry room is off of the kitchen. So, when I was taking my last load out of the dryer, I got an intense cramp in my stomach. I sat the basket down and stood up. I slowly made my way to the living room to lie down on the couch. By the time I sat down, another cramp hit me. I called Thane’s cell phone and got his voice mail. I didn’t know where his business meeting was at. I called his office and nobody answered. I called Marissa. I told her what was going on. She told me to call an ambulance. So, I called the ambulance. The ambulance came and got me to the ER within 30 minutes of my call. After the ER doctor saw me, he sent me to the OB/GYN wing to be admitted. I was told by Dr. Harman that I was going into early labor. They were going to start pumping me with medication to help stop the labor. Finally after about an hour, Thane called my cell. The nurse answered it for me. She told Thane what was going on. Thane arrived at the hospital within 20 minutes. He told me his phone was turned off in his pocket. He wasn’t sure how it got turned off. He took it out of his pocket to call me and ask me if I wanted something to eat and that is when he noticed it was off. He then listened to my voicemail and read my text. He kept apologizing for not answering it. I told him I wasn’t worried about that. All I was worried about was getting the labor stopped. The doctor said I had to stay calm.
After being in the hospital for five days, I got to go home. I was going to be put on bed rest for the rest of my pregnancy. I would only be allowed up so many hours a day. Thane insisted I come and stay with him. He had a cook, housekeeper and would get a nurse to come in to monitor my condition. I was grateful for all the support. I called Cooryn to tell him what was going on as well too. He said he was going to come and see me. I told him I would be staying at Thane’s. He didn’t have to make the trip. He said he was making the trip. He seemed like he really wanted to be involved. I was hoping that this situation wouldn't turn out bad. I know I could handle it if all of this started to blow up in my face once I had to start remaining calm.
Five weeks before my due date, Coor shows up at Thane’s house. He said we needed to talk. I knew things were probably going to get bad. I had a bad feeling that Coor was going to start wanting to play a role in Braelyn’s life. I just had to get this under control. I couldn’t do anything to hurt Thane. Yet, this was Coor’s baby girl. But, Coor let it be known months ago he didn’t want to be a dad or anything else.
“Bly, I don’t know if I can walk away from our daughter.” Coor says.
“What has brought this change of heart now, Coor?” I said in a pleading voice.
“The more I think about you and Braelyn, the more I don’t want to sit on the sidelines anymore.”
“Where were you when I told you about her and needed you? You made it perfectly clear you didn’t want all of this. I am building a life with Thane and now you want to come in and complicate that.”
I am crying now.
“I don’t want to hurt you, Bly. I just feel I have a right to change my mind.”
“Oh, I see, you finally want to grow up, and I am supposed to just drop everything and accommodate you now?”
“I don’t mean it like that. I love you, Bly.”
“You know what Coor, I love you too. I have always loved you. But, I can’t do this. You can say you will be here now and then in a month or two are gone.”
“I would never just abandon you, Bly.”
“You won’t abandon us, but you will want your freedom. You will want those other women. You won’t be able to just live with me in your bed. I will not move to Ohio. I know you will not move here. So, it will be a part time dad on your part.”
I am talking in a very defensive voice.
“I just want you to move back
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