Mario and the Koopa Conspiracy, Martin C. Featherworth [book recommendations .txt] 📗

5?”
“We’re in World 1. We used your pipe.” said Yoshi. “It was nice, by the way. As nice as Inter-World Transit.”
“Well, thank you. I try,” replied Mario. He realized something. “Hey, how were you conscious to enjoy my professional pipe? Didn’t you get exploded on, too?”
“The explosion knocked you guys out, but not me,” the dinosaur said, addressing the brothers. “I recovered right away and brought you guys through. Then, we met up with these two,” Yoshi said with a motion to the bob-omb and koopa.
“Oh…alright then.” Mario glanced around the room once more. “Is there a fast way to World 4 anywhere near here?” he asked.
“Yeah, there is. We were talking about that before you woke up,” said Luigi.
“There’s a pipe nearby. Behind this house. It’s on an elevated bit of ground. You’ll see it,” Yoshi added. Mario got up at once and hastily made his way toward the door.
“Let’s go, then!” he said. “C’mon! Let’s go!
“Wait, Mario.” Yoshi stopped him once more. “You should go without us. It would be much easier to sneak in that way.”
“And if you get hurt, we’ll be here to help you,” Luigi said. Mario paused briefly.
“Alright then. I will go.” Mario opened the front door. He put on his most “heroic” face, which included a distant gaze and furrowed eyebrows. “I shall return from my quest with the greatest of haste!” Mario burst out in a deep loud voice, trying (and failing miserably) to imitate a British accent. Yoshi shook his head as Quick and Bob-omb exchanged looks. Luigi was wholly unimpressed. “Ciao,” he said as he hurried out the door.
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Indeed the pipe had been atop a small bit of elevated land. The pipe was obscured by trees, but it was still visible. It wasn’t a well-used pipe, so Mario had been wary of piranha plants as he approached it. Thankfully, there hadn’t been any, so Mario was able to hop right into the pipe. The diameter of the inside was smaller than an Inter-World Transit pipe — three-and-a-half feet. But even Mario, despite his pudginess, was able to fit perfectly inside.
The actual travel experience was far less luxurious than a commercial pipe; it took harsh turns and was significantly slower. It was also a bit rusty and dirty on the inside. Mario couldn’t help but think about how much better the pipe would be if he would have made it. No, this pipe was not meant for casual transverse between Worlds. This pipe was strictly for utility purposes. But, judging by the general lack of care, it had been abandoned. Quite some time ago, as Mario reasoned.
Mario felt his sleeve briefly get caught in something. For a moment, he was a bit worried. It had better not have been a piranha plant. Mario’s shoes passed over a bump. Oh, it must have only been a crack in the pipe. Crack in the pipe? Mario cringed. For him, that was one of the worst notions ever to enter his mind: a cracked pipe. He practically wanted to go get his tools now and fix this mess of a pipe. But alas, he could not. He was stuck in here until he came to World 4.
Mario began to see light. It grew brighter and brighter as he scraped along through the breaking pipe. In an instant, it made a complete ninety-degree turn upward into the light. He was approaching World 4 now. Mario could already smell the salty ocean.
He reached the top of the pipe and jumped out. Mario now stood on one of the many small islands of World 4, the tropical beach World. He was in a remote area that seemed to be free of civilization. This just-so-happened to be near Bowser’s World 4 stronghold. Mario had gone this route to the stronghold before, but Peach had not been inside of it. No, only one of Bowser’s annoying koopa kids. Mario didn’t remember which, nor did he care to. Mario only cared now about saving Princess Peach. Defeating Bowser. Mario had not realized it yet, but he also cared not only about saving the princess, but the princess herself. 6: Flames of War in World 4?

Mario’s trip across the islands of World 4 had been a quick one. His arrival there had been unexpected, so Bowser had not yet stationed any minions to try and stop him. Usually, Mario would start right from Peach’s Castle, since that was usually the place Bowser abducted her from. He would travel through World 1 to Bowser’s stronghold, and Bowser would leave and go to World 2’s stronghold. Mario would have to go through all eight Worlds to arrive at Bowser’s true castle, where he always kept Peach. Or, at least that’s where she always was when Mario arrived there. Now, Mario was beginning to doubt whether or not the journey through all eight Worlds was even necessary. Bowser could have been holding the princess in any castle stronghold and only have moved her to World 8 in the end. It didn’t matter now, however. Now it only mattered to get Peach back.
He bounded over beaches, swam in the sea (without getting wet, or course), and progressed past by plenty of palm trees as he carried on through World 4 to the stronghold. Its dark towers came closer and closer as Mario moved on. He stopped on a cliff he had come upon to have a look at the stronghold. It looked just like all of Bowser’s strongholds: a castle keep decorated with a few deadly spikes and flying Bowser’s flag atop the towers. There was something else about it, too. A few members of Bowser’s troops stood by and conversed with one another. Mario watched as a koopa with glasses, a magic staff, and a blue robe and a matching blue wizard hat stormed out of the castle to scold them. It was a magikoopa for certain. What could be the significance of this? Nothing?
Mario lowered himself down from the cliff. He scouted around the area for any unattended blocks. Mario found a 1-up and a red mushroom of healing. The red mushroom looked just like a 1-up except the color. These mushrooms could heal fatal injuries rapidly. Mario devoured the 1-up immediately and slipped the red mushroom into his overalls pocket for later. The mushroom might help improve his stamina in a battle against Bowser, which he knew would have to take place. The castle lay ahead.
Shortly after his mushroom find, he came upon the stronghold. He hid by the side, close enough to hear the conversation the minions outside were having.
“So when do ya think he’ll get here?” asked a goomba. The brown mushroom with angry eyebrows and a fanged underbite was with another of his kind and a red-shelled koopa, and they stood near to where Mario lie in wait.
“He’s gotta go through our other bases first. It’s what he always does,” the koopa replied. Were the minions talking about Mario?
“Yeah, but what if he gets here earlier?” the first goomba asked again.
“If he gets here early, I’ll show him my bad side!” said the other goomba in the group. The koopa looked over to him.
“Your ‘bad side?’” the koopa repeated. He scoffed at him.
“Oh c’mon! He’s just a fat human from World Earth! How scary could he be?” Mario couldn’t help but chuckle quietly to himself. Nobody heard him, and they carried on with their conversation.
“You don’t ever want to meet him in person. Trust me, he’s bad news,” said the red-shelled koopa. “Feet that crush your head like a thwomp.”
“Yeah, man! He’ll squash you and wipe your guts off his boot like they’re mud!” the other goomba added. Mario had to use a massive amount of self-control to not burst out laughing. Instead, he grinned like an idiot, his body shaking with silent guffaws. “Better eat your 1-ups at breakfast!” said the little brown mushroom.
“But…he looks like a joke! He’s barely taller than you and has that funny accent!” the goomba argued, addressing the koopa. The koopa spoke.
“Don’t be fooled,” he said, trying to be dramatic. “Beneath that goofy smiling face is a ruthless killer. Mark my words. The day the sole of his shoe meets your face you will remember this…moment.” The goomba who argued looked dumbfounded.
“He’s weird,” said the other goomba. The group was silent for a moment. Mario watched as a creature on all fours with a blue smooth shell and red eyes approached the three. It was known as a beetle, though it was definitely more closely related to a koopa than an insect. It was a species in the koopa family. Beetles like this one tended to like the darkness, living in caves and only coming out at night. Why was this one awake now? It must have had a good reason. Or perhaps…
“’Tis I, the Mysterious Beetle,” the beetle said in a cool, calm voice. The two goombas and koopa groaned in succession. Indeed, it was the Mysterious Beetle. This particular beetle was known for appearing random places at random times to give vague advice that ultimately proved to be useful in the end. There were those who had theorized about him, wondering if he had some kind of mental condition. Still others thought that he could see the future, and he gave advice as a foreshadowing of what was to come.
“So what’s shakin,’ Mystery? Got any prophecies for us?” the goomba who had argued about Mario asked the beetle sarcastically. The beetle ignored the goomba and kept his intense gaze.
“A wise man holds his tongue,” he said. The other goomba furrowed his brow in thought, and the koopa just shook his yellow turtle-like head. Mysterious Beetle continued.
“…But a fool speaks rashly.” The beetle turned his head in the general direction of Mario. “One must be careful when speaking of disaster, for his own doom may lurk just around the corner.” Mario stopped cold. What was the beetle speaking of? Was Mario the doom of the three minions? Or… Was the beetle’s comment directed to Mario?
“‘Just around the corner?’” the contemplating goomba repeated aloud. “‘Doom?’” The beetle slipped away again, disappearing just as suddenly as he had appeared.
“Oh, don’t be ridiculous! There’s no doom lurking around the corner!” the other goomba laughed in defiance. The goomba walked along the wall, coming close to where Mario hid. “See! Nothing!” The other goomba ran to him, and the koopa followed.
“Maybe it was a figurative corner,” said the koopa.
“No, it was a literal corner,” Mario said, coming out of hiding. He smiled at them and waved “hello.” The three of them were too shocked to respond. The koopa started to back away. Before he could run, Mario leapt onto him, stomping his head into his shell. The once-fearless goomba shrieked in fear as Mario kicked the shell of his friend right into him and the other goomba. The shell kept sliding across the ground until it was lost into the ocean. With the koopa gone and the two goombas laying, lifeless on