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With her two other temp jobs at the ticketing booth and fitness centre, she barely has time for the boys.” When I made to protest, he said, raising his hands before him, “I’m not saying give up the bookstore, just…” He exhaled. “I don’t know.”
We were silent for a while as we both sank back into our own thoughts. During then, the sky cleared up into a lighter shade of grey-blue and a weak glow lit up the trees from behind.
“Well, we can handle the publicity works for her, then,” I said finally, watching the leaves turn colour slowly.
He shot me a strange look. “Publicity,” he repeated.
“Yes,” I said firmly. “All you need is just some publicity to get the business rolling in. In this little neighbourhood, it’s hard to get a lot of business, right? So we can work on that. Then she’ll be able to concentrate on all –”
“Wait a second.” His brow crinkled as he frowned over what I had just said. “We?”
A burn spread across my cheeks. “I meant – you, of course, just you. I didn’t mean –”
“No, what I meant was,” he said, with a slight smile, “You want to help?”
“Can’t I?”
His grin assured me. “How? Publicity needs money, everything does.”
I hesitated. “We could … ask for some funding from your mom? Surely she’d want to see her father’s business flourish again, right?”
He shook his head. “Mom and Gabriel would never help unless they get majority shareholding of the business. They’ve always wanted to make the Old Belle into some sort of franchise, but grandpa would never let them.”
There was not much that I knew of Caleb’s parents, but from what I had seen of them so far, funding only if they held majority of the stakes sounded like them. I knew better than to say that to Caleb, of course.
“We can always start by telling people about it,” I said instead. “Word of mouth is often the most effective publicity medium. And then, we can work on the rest as it all plays out.” I cracked him a slight smile. It felt stiff, like how someone who had not been talking for over a year would sound hoarse.
He stared at me, then, his gaze never flickering. His eyes were a deep shade of brown that were smiling, as though seeing me for the first time.
“What are you looking at?” I said, fingering the hem of my sweater.
It was strange, but I was never really any good at eye contact. Even with Blake, if he stared too much, I would quickly break the gaze. He’d say I was too afraid of what people may see, and that was how truly beautiful I was. I would then call him the corniest guy in the world, and we would leave it at that, him accepting the title like he accepted everything else.
He smiled, finally. “Look at you. I never would have pegged you for a businesswoman, Miss Perennially Unhappy.”
“Morning, Cale!” a lean Indian boy called out.
I blinked and turned to look at him, annoyed at but grateful for the distraction.
Caleb waved in response, as the boy slipped today’s papers through the gates. “Thanks, Jay. Later.”
I could only stare as Jay the paperboy rode away on his bike. There were moments when you made what you wanted to believe the reality of your life. That was when people would call you crazy, but in my book, crazy was when you did not even notice when you blended truth with hope.

*

Jade, as I grew to learn, was a fan of planning.
“I thought about it last night,” she was now saying to Reilly over breakfast. “This will be good for all of us. As a family. So run with me on this, okay?” Jade stared at her sister, her eyes wide and pleading.
Dad had left for work; I only received a brief, “Be good,” before he escaped, crunching on a piece of toast on his way out. After Caleb had gotten back from his run, the four of us were left sitting at the kitchen table, breakfast spread out before out. But right then, I would rather have hitched an awkward car ride someplace else with my father than be there.
Reilly dropped her fork onto her plate on purpose. Breakfast was a huge affair for someone as slim as her; every inch of her plate had been covered by eggs, toast, oatmeal, Coco Crunch and two bananas.
“You cannot be serious.”
Caleb shot me a look, but I resolved to stay out of this.
“Think about it, Ri,” Jade said. “It’ll be a rare chance for us to get to really know each other better, properly –”
“Okay,” Reilly said, picking up her fork again. “First of all, note the word rare. Second, I don’t need to know either of you” – she pointed at Caleb and Jade – “better because there’s nothing else I should know that I don’t. The only other people you can possibly be talking about are … let me think.” She placed a finger on her chin and pulled a thoughtful look. “Those two sleeping upstairs. No offence to you, Kristen, it’s just – we’re on the subject of family and…” She waved. “You know.”
I nodded and went back to my cutting up my banana. Caleb’s bemusement at my food was not missed by me.
“Ri, come on, she’s your mother to,” Jade said. “Just try it. You’ve got nothing on today, so why not?”
“Because nothing you do is ever going to make me and her bond.” She rolled her eyes at the last word.
Jade pouted.
Caleb suddenly spoke up, his tone harsher than it had been yesterday. “You should really just get over your damn pride already. I mean, mom was kind enough to let you stay here even though you decided your loyalties lied with dad all those years ago –”
“You do not want to go there, Caleb,” Reilly said, flicking her gaze to him like a pebble flung into the water.
He leaned back in his seat. “You’re not even trying, is all I’m saying. She’s your mother, Ri.”
“She has never acted like one, nor will she ever be one to me. Why should I try when she has never tried all these years? I’m sorry, if making amends is what she’s trying to do now – by buying me over with a place to stay – it’s about two decades too late.”
And then she went back to her Coco Crunch.
When Mr and Mrs Burnstead came down for breakfast, we were still not talking – me because there was nothing appropriate that I could say, and the rest because they were all too busy being angry at each other, or maybe Reilly was just concentrating on her breakfast.
“Good morning. How is everyone today?”
Mr Burnstead’s perpetual politeness was beginning to creep me out.
“Let’s do something fun today,” Jade exulted, reaching for another piece of toast. “I thought about it last night. Let’s spend the day at the beach. We can head there after breakfast.”
Reilly sighed. It was a loud one that even I, sitting the furthest away from her, did not miss.
“That,” Mrs Burnstead said as she stirred her yoghurt, “is a delightful idea.” Her mild expression did nothing to support that proclamation. “We might be a little busy, though. Can it wait till –”
Over at the other end of the table, Reilly snorted.
Mrs Burnstead stopped her stirring and stared at her. “What’s that again?”
“I should have told you not to get your hopes up on that one, Jade,” Reilly said, ignoring her mother. “I forgot how busy she can be. I didn’t even have to dissuade you.”
I snuck a peek at Mrs Burnstead and her husband, feeling caught somewhere I was not supposed to be. Caleb was watching them too, except that he was not as surreptitious as I was.
Mrs Burnstead stretched her lips across her face. “I said it would be a delightful idea, and we’d love to spend the day with all of you.” She turned to me and I froze. “And of course, that means you too, Kristina.”
I was too busy wishing she would rescind the offer to correct her on my name.
Looking at Caleb and Jade, Mrs Burnstead went on, “Gabriel and I will meet you all at the beach later on, after we have finished sorting out some loose business.”
Mr Burnstead nodded once. “We’ll see you there.”
“I wouldn’t count on it,” I heard Reilly mutter.
Caleb heard nothing, so I wondered if his mom did. Maybe they had all decided to tune Reilly out.

*

I had no idea we were that close to the beach. Nor did I know that Reilly and Tate were married, or at least involved, that he had become family too.
But Reilly caught my surprised expression as Tate’s grey minivan rumbled around the corner up to our house, and hastened to clarity. “I only told him to come along just in case things get boring. I mean, seeing as how you’re not family and you got asked to come along” – she rolled her eyes – “I didn’t see why I couldn’t bring a friend along too.”
“She tells him to tag along everywhere. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you only wanted a free ride,” Jade said as Tate pumped the horn lightly.
Reilly grabbed her beach bag. “What if you knew better?”
“The answer’s obvious,” was all Jade said with a smile as she climbed into the van. “Thanks for joining us, Tate.”
Tate snorted in reply. He was, as I came to learn, averse to social niceties.
“Tate, jeez!” Reilly cried as she buckled up. “You’re drunk already? It’s only ten in the morning!”
Rolling his eyes, Tate said, “For your information, I spilled a can in your seat last night. I am as sober as you are this morning. Would you quit mother-henning, Catwalk?”
Tate had the radio on, and I never would have pegged him as an oldies guy, but apparently he was. Kansas was one of Blake’s favourite bands from the seventies, which was how I recognised the song.
It was ironic how many reminders of Blake I had encountered ever since I entered Wroughton, when the intention of moving here was to get over him.
“Don’t you cry no more,” Caleb and Jade belted out, and Caleb proceeded to air-drum. Jade followed suit and air-guitared.
“You guys are excited,” Tate remarked, grinning lazily through the rear-view mirror.
“Way to go, Sherlock,” Reilly said.
She was about to say something else, but Tate turned up the volume and yelled, “Live in the moment, Catwalk,” over the racket of screaming electric guitar and drums.
The beach was relatively deserted when we got there, save for a handful of joggers.
I was content to sit on the mat while the rest of them frolicked around with the volleyball Jade had brought along, but Caleb bumped my shoulder with his and said, smirking, “You’re not really just going to sit there, are you?”
“I’m fine.”
“For someone who doesn’t like to be alone, you sure impose isolation on yourself a lot.”
He gave me a lopsided smile when I stared at him.
I had always looked at those beautiful and toned golden bodies at beaches with a sort of indifferent envy, like something you wished you had – the sense of not being caring about anything else but how much fun you were capable of having then – but, oh well, didn’t.
So it surprised me how I readily I was able to immerse myself in that mid-morning moment, screaming and laughing when I collided
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