The gospel of Itchy Wiggle Christ, Gregory-John McCormick, Ralf Dellhofen [black books to read .TXT] 📗

to imagine a life with her when i never see her. i see jennifer tilly, tho. i see lots of girls on TV. it is frustrating, especially when i have not spoken to a real woman for four years, face to face. steffi writes me once in a while. shit, don´t know what to think or feel or do anymore. tell me what is my life? who am i, without you?

 

food goes in the mouth and is then crapped out, normally. the dead flesh of what was once a sweet little animal gets turned into a brown stinking paste that is expelled out the asshole. and all of it done to keep all you people alive, so you can LIVE. it hardly seems a befitting fate for the little animals who did nothing to deserve death in order to feed your fat faces, nor does it ring true for me that people are allowed to live from the death of the innocent. the whole idea of eating dead flesh creeps me out completely. and given the fact that i am a complete misanthrope and believe that most of this world is populated by monsters who do not deserve life anyway. i guess that makes me a real scary type of vegetarian. "animal rights" is a truth that i can find no argument against. if one of you flesh-eaters want to tell me that animals have no soul, i will simply point out that a cow or chicken or lambs or pig has more soul in their eyes than you will ever possess. and for these monsters that experiment on animals for "research" - those monsters deserve treatment of the like. i would whole-heartedly volunteer to be the master experimenter. there is very much "research" i would perform on people who use animals for experimentation. STUFF that would make hannibal lecter sick to his stomach. i know i am not alone in my thoughts and beliefs, but not all vegetarians have the same disgust for flesh-eaters that i have. maybe moby does, haha. but i doubt it. well, enjoy your next big mac. i hope it gives you colon cancer.

 

now is the time for the ceremony of possession. make them kneel! a number of my friends have been put to sleep for good. terrible sun creating hell-like conditions in this little corner of hell. he found a most undesireable way to die. because of my inadequecies, i am forced to accept the deep dark inevitable. i consented to this under duress. isn´t it debasing enough without having this ass spraying shit all over the place? i need to sleep, i need to be put to sleep, i need to be put to sleep for good, and forever.

 

and the day comes again to a close. batman on TV. it´s hot as a bitch, i should have been rich. get off the cross, itchy, someone else needs the wood. hello, vinnie, it´s your uncle bingo - time to pay the check. is it true, that if i see myself as a victim, i will never be able to grow or be constructive? really? how could i not see myself as a victim? i do not think any person could endure as i have in here without feeling like a victim or at least cracking up inside. i´ve done both. the crackling sounds persist in my head, at times i feel like i cannot stand being alive in here for one more minute. this town needs an enema, i need and enema for my soul, which is quite befitting for one of the world´s biggest assholes. or the world´s greatest patsy. i´m of the mind to make some mooky. if only. but mr. wiggles has not seen a squishy nice thing for many many years. and it could be many more before he does, if he ever does again. but then again. he has had a lot. more in 20 years of squishy nice things than most any man had. hmm. spare us the cutter. drown me in my own pool of dark stinking shit. to hell with this, all of "this".

 

"knock knock!"

"who´s there?"

"gonorrhea"

"gonorrhea who?"

"gonorrhea-L dick and i´m gonna make you sick"

 

good morning, all you slaves! here comes another sweet day of hot sun and short tempers, hate and aggression fueled by radiation from the growing yellow ball in the sky. "you take the adults, i got the kids!". that was a quote from a child molesting gingerbread cookie. i was thinking about social parameters just as i woke up. how complex society is, how confusing. every aspect of society is affected by something else, or many things. all to the point to where it is an overwhelming task to try and make sense of it all, and yet if i am going to be a good anarchist and taoist, i would not give a flying shit about any of this. and in fact, i don´t. i only want to be left alone, to only interact with the very few people i interact with. the social parameters of my own relationships are enough. clown, gods, puppies. a puddle of urine.

 

responsible moms who become addicted to prescription pain killers. but first a message from god, direct from heaven to all the peons on earth: HA HA HA. we will figure out who did this horrible thing. am i the only person on earth who thinks we are seeing the end of the world? a band of roving homeless people, a satanic cult, transients. some dumb fucker kills his wife and unborn baby. osama was spotted walking down houston street in manhattan yesterday. old folks cannot eat properly from their government pensions and are forced to survive on dog food. roving packs of rats attacking small children, cats and dogs in the beautiful city-of-detroit. i´m not touching you, i believe in love.

 

if it´s war they want, it´s war they´ll get. shit my pants today, horrible case of diarrhea to go along with my daily migrain headaches. i am fairly certain i have cancer of some sort. wouldn´t that be lovely? it would only be a welcome end to my now-senseless and useless life. i sit and wait and sleep and cry and puke blood. this is not living, this is not life. wake up, time to die. the light that burns twice as bright only burns half as long, and my light has burned so very very brightly. when it gets to the point where one is looking forward to not waking up, or better yet, waking up dead. then it is time to say "enough is enough". free me, brighid.

 

"the fifth element" is on TV now. milla jovovich + bruce willis. the point being in the movie that love is what will keep the world alive, or something like that. miss jovovich is portrayed as the perfect being who brings life thru love. hmm. i agree that she is perfect, but the business about love, well, i believe it only because without love, i feel myself dying. i have no will to live. i have no love in my life, only what i feel for a girl thousands of kilometers away. there´s no way to show my love for her. only letters, but those mean very little to her. i walk around feeling hate and disgust and fear all day long. i loathe the mornings when i wake up. so much is wrong with this whole fucking situation. so much is wrong with this world. not even miss jovovich could save this real world in the end. and there is very little reason to save the world. it is shit, and it should be flushed down the toilet of endless entropic eternity. so, in a funny way, i really believe in the power of love. only because without it as i exist, i wish to hell i were dead. say goodbye to all of this.

 

oh shit, we better get out of here fast, milla.

non, grégor, tu est mort.

whatever doesn´t kill me only makes me stronger, eh?

mais oui, bien homme. hihihi.

 

good morning america, how are you? i hope you die. summer fun can quickly turn dangerous. how many shitheads were killed last night in the city of detroit? ah yes, detroit, murder capital of the usa. that city is the hemorrhoidal stinking butthole of america. no one would miss it if the entire city just sank down into the ground. all except the crack dealers, murderers, and prostitute crack whores. but since there are about a million of those in detroit, well, who gives a fuck? heroes versus hijackers. is that it? do we finish it off? is that it? should we put it down? allah is great, should we put it down? ja, you bet. put it down, way down. these were words of some hijackers and some plane passengers who got in a scuffle when the hijackers were trying to crash the plane into washington, hmm. it brings back memories of me and the band drinking many fifths of irish whiskey, murphy´s irish whiskey to be exact, on a plane flight from nyc to london. we were very drunk, i was dancing on the seat. the limey fag of a captain came back and told me "if you do not sit down and be quiet mr. mccormick, i will be forced to put you in leg irons and hand you over to british authorities when we land". well, i would have liked to see that twat try to put me in leg irons, ha ha. hmm, it would have been comical. maybe that plane would have crashed into the atlantic or greenland or something. maybe then i would not be where i am now. what a bunch of shit.

 

bad morning, good morning. who gives a flying shit? some kind of spanish TV station is the only thing on in the mornings on saturday. some sex goddess mexican girl with giant milk factories on a show about different places around the world. i have various libidinous and lecter-like thoughts of what i would do to her if given the chance. sharp objects in her body orifices, or my own not-so-sharp but prominent object, ha ha. sex, there is an elusive and torturing subject for me in my current position. it´s best i never think of it, actually. but given my rather prolific past with girls, it is very difficult to just forget that i used to enjoy sex. now i can only think of it and live out weird fantasies while seeing the rare woman i find attractive on TV. i say rare, because not so many women attract me, only certain types. dark-haired, intellectual, and crazy, and thin. fat women disgust me. i don´t think much either way about breast size. the best sex i ever had was with girls with very small breasts. it is a girl´s personality and wit that seems to attract me. pretty eyes, often. this is all thought, tho, and not of much worth. thinking and not being able to touch a woman. it cancels out any worth.

 

it often comes to mind how fucked-up the world is in it´s thinking that "men" are created equal. i must put up with the worst monsters in the world, with their loud mouths that spew unintelligable monkey-language, and the sick faggotry that is so rampant amongst the monsters. such a great percentage of them cannot read or write, but they know how to steal and rape and sell drugs. if these monsters were animals, there would be a thriving business in euthanizing these things. veterinarians put horses and dogs "to sleep", they kill the animals, for much less reason than the curse that these monsters bring to a structured society. but this type of thinking is not allowed, especially in the wonderful land of opportunity that is the united states of america. the usa will force it´s citizens to believe that the most well-behaved, gentle, quiet and good citizen is absolutely equal