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up and looks thoughtful. “Sebastian here is more of a pet. Although I am thinking about it. Did you know the noise from snapping shrimps is so loud it can interfere with marine sonar?”

“No, I didn’t know that.”

“Oh yes. Extremely interesting invertebrates. Anyhow.” He suddenly smiles. “What can I do for you young man?”

For a second I actually can’t remember, but then I do.

“I just – I wanted to introduce myself, I’m Billy Wheatley. I’m one of the new students in your freshmen tutor group.”

Professor Hall’s face goes a bit dark then.

“No you’re not.”

“What?”

“You would be, if my name was Professor Hall, but it’s not. He and I share an office, but I am not he.” He articulates the last words very individually, so that even though it doesn’t sound like it makes sense, it still does. I glance across at the other desk in the room. It looks kind of similar to his, but it doesn’t have the fish tank.

“Oh. Sorry.”

“No problem at all. If you’d been looking for Professor Little, then you’d be in the right place, since that’s me. But I don’t take any freshmen students. Professor Hall did just leave though, if you’re quick you may be able to catch him. He’ll be in the refectory.”

“Oh. Right, thanks.”

Professor Little smiles again, as if to say it was no trouble, and then leans back over his microscope. I’m about to back out and leave him alone, when I realize I can’t.

“Erm, just one more thing…”

He lifts his eye from the microscope and, after a half-second’s hesitation, gives me the same smile.

“Let me guess, you want to know why I named an Alpheidae Sebastian? Well it’s a perfectly decent name for a shrimp, don’t you think?”

“Erm, yeah. Only it’s not what I wanted to know. I just wondered what Professor Hall looks like?”

“Oh. Yes. Look for the outrageously loud Hawaiian shirt imprinted with images of the Hibiscus flower. You can’t miss him.”

“Thanks.”

“Thank you.” He turns back to the tank, and a bit reluctantly I back out.

I take the stairs this time, since I need a little time to steady myself. Everything is so new, and so exciting, and I want to make a good first impression on the real Professor Hall. Plus it’s only one floor up.

The refectory is quite large, and it has views all the way around the building, but it isn’t full. There’s maybe twenty people here. And I quickly scan around for a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt, and like Professor Little said, there’s only one. But that can’t be Professor Hall, because this man is far too young. Like, in his twenties young – with long black hair, a gold chain around his neck. And he’s sitting with the girls I saw earlier in the elevator, they’re all laughing together. I stare in confusion, and somehow he must notice it, because I catch his eye. And then I’d feel wrong if I didn’t explain why it is I’m staring. So I move forward.

“Excuse me, are you Professor Hall? Professor Lawrence Hall?”

“No.” He says, and I’m immediately relieved. I have made a mistake after all. Which is good, because this man can’t be my tutor.

“Well technically I am, but I’m not a fan of the title. Makes me sound a bit too uptight if you know what I mean.” He turns to the girls. “Just call me Lawrence.” They giggle like they did in the elevator, and I feel their eyes on me.

“And you are?”

It’s kind of an automatic reaction. I stick out a hand. “Billy. Billy Wheatley.”

He raises his eyebrows to make me go on.

“I’m in your tutor group.”

Then his face changes. It’s like he panics. “Oh shit. Now?”

I don’t understand what he’s talking about.

“You’ve got a tutor group now?”

“Oh! No. No it’s not until next week. On Wednesday, at three pm.”

“Thank Christ for that.” He looks relieved, and smiles. He’s got a good smile but he knows it, I can tell by the way he turns to show it off to the girls. Then he looks back to me.

“So how can I help you?”

Still I feel the girls watching me. I start to wonder what they’re all doing here. I start to wonder what I’m doing there, come to that.

“I just wanted to come and introduce myself. As it says in the course prospectus. The relationship between a student and a tutor is very important.”

There’s a silence. And as it stretches out I know I’ve said the wrong thing. I don’t know why I added the bit about the prospectus – although it does say it there. It’s like I wanted to provide evidence to back up my argument. Then one of the girls, the prettiest one I note, starts to laugh, covering her mouth a moment later, but it sets the others off. Then Professor Hall starts laughing.

“It’s just…” I begin, feeling my face flushing hot.

“No, no. You’re right. It is important. Something some of my second year students here would do well to remember.” He raises his eyebrows at the girls, then leans back and stretches his arms behind his head. I think back to the questions I thought of earlier, about what his specialisms are. But I’m not going to ask them now. I’m not an idiot.

There’s a silence, as they all stop laughing.

“Well Mr Wheatley. Consider yourself introduced.” Professor Hall says, a few moments later. “I’ll see you in our first session next week.”

I think about asking whether there’s anything I need to do before then, like read up on a subject or anything, but I guess he’d email us if there is. So instead I just nod and take a step back. Then I turn and walk away, but I can hear the girls are bursting into laughter behind me, and this time Professor Hall isn’t doing anything to stop them.

Chapter Eight

By the time I get back, Guy and Jimbo are already drinking, and the pile of trash overflowing the trash can has grown a bit

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