The Created Legend, Fyodor Sologub [ebook reader with android os .txt] 📗

another. The even breathing of her sleeping sister gave a poignant reality to the terrible world of night and slumber.

Elisaveta and Elena did not converse long that night. They parted early. Elisaveta undressed herself, lit a candle, and began to admire herself in the cold, dead, indifferent mirror. Pearl-like were the moon’s reflections on the lines of her graceful body. Palpitating were her white girlish breasts, crowned by two rubies. The living, passionate form stood flaming and throbbing, strangely white in the tranquil rays of the moon. The gradual curves of the body and legs were precise and delicate. The skin stretched across the knees hinted at the elastic energy that it covered. And equally elastic and energetic were the curves of the calves and the feet.

Elisaveta’s body flamed all over, as though a fire had penetrated the whole sweet, sensitive flesh; and oh, how she wished to press, to cling, to embrace! If he would only come! Only by day he spoke to her his dead-sounding words of love, kindled by the kisses of the accursed Dragon. Oh, if he would only come by night to the secretly flaming great Fire of the blossoming Flesh!

Did he love her? Was his a final and a single-souled love conquering by the eternal spirit of the divine Aphrodite? Where love is there daring should be also. Is love, then, gentle, meek, obedient? Is it not a flame, decreed to take what is its own without waiting?

Her eager, impatient fancies seethed. If he only had come he would have been a young god. But he was only a human being who bowed down before his idol; he was a small slave of a small demon. He did not come, he had not dared, he had not guessed: a dark grief came over Elisaveta from the secret seething of her passion.

As she looked at her wonderful image in the mirror, Elisaveta thought:

“Perhaps he is praying. The weak and the haughty⁠—why do they pray? They should be taught to be joyous, to remake their religion and be the first in the new sect.”

Elisaveta could not sleep. Desire tormented her; she did not know what she wanted⁠—was it to go?⁠—to wait? She walked out on the balcony. The nocturnal coolness caressed her naked body. She stood there long; the contact of her naked feet with the warm, moist boards was pleasant. She looked into the pale light of the mist-wrapt garden dreaming there under the moon. She recalled at this moment the details of the day’s walk, and all that they had seen in Trirodov’s house; she recalled it all so clearly, with almost the vividness of a hallucination. Then a drowsiness crept up, seized her. And Elisaveta could not recall later how she found herself in her bed. It was almost as if an invisible being had carried her, tucked her in, and rocked her to sleep.

It was a restless, tormenting sleep. She saw horrible visions, nightmares. They were remarkably clear and real.

She was in a very dusty room. The air in it was stifling, it oppressed her breast. The walls were covered with bookcases filled with books. The tables were also covered with books⁠—all new, slender, with bright covers. The title-pages were for some reason ponderous, terrible to look at. A tall, gaunt, long-haired student entered; his hair was very straight, his face morose and grey, he wore spectacles. He whispered:

“Hide them.”

And he placed on the table a bundle of books and pamphlets. Someone behind Elisaveta stretched out a hand, took the books, and thrust them under the table. Then came a woman student, strangely resembling the man student yet quite different; she was short, thick, red-cheeked, short-haired, cheerful, and wore pince-nez. She also brought a bundle of books, and said quietly:

“Hide them.”

Elisaveta hid the books in the bookcase and was afraid of something.

Then came more students, working men, young women, schoolboys, military men, officials, and clerks; each, placing a packet of books on the table, whispered:

“Hide them.”

Each one slipped away. And Elisaveta went to work to hide the books. She put them in the table drawer, in the cupboard, under the sofas, behind the doors, and in the fireplace. But the pile of books on the table grew and grew; more and more persistent became the whisper:

“Hide them.”

There was no hiding-place left, and yet the books were still being brought in⁠—there was no end to them. Everywhere books⁠—they were pressing on her breast.⁠ ⁠…

Elisaveta awakened. Someone’s face was bending over her. The bedcover slipped from her handsome body. Elena was whispering something. Elisaveta asked her in a drowsy voice:

“Did I wake you?”

“You cried out so,” said Elena.

“I’ve had such a stupid dream,” whispered Elisaveta.

She went to sleep again, and again the same hoard of books. There were so many books that even the windowsills were piled up with them, and a dim and dusty gleam of light barely penetrated. An ominous silence tormented her. Behind the counter at her side stood a student and two boys, strangely erect; they were pale, and seemed to wait for something. All at once the door opened noiselessly. Many men entered, making a loud noise with their boots⁠—first a police official, then another, then a detective in gold-rimmed spectacles, a house-porter, another house-porter, a muzhik, a policeman, another muzhik, another house-porter. More and more came; they filled the room, and still they came⁠—huge, moody, silent fellows. Elisaveta felt it stifling; she awoke.

Again she dropped into sleep, again she was tormented by horrible visions oppressing the breast.

She dreamt that the house was being searched.

“An illegal book!” exclaimed a detective, looking ominously at her as he put a book on the table.

The pile of the illegal books on the table began to grow. They were examined and shaken. A police official sat down to make out a list. The pen ran on, but there was not enough paper.

“More paper!” cried the official.

Page was filled after page. The official mocked at her, threatened her with a revolver.

Once more she awoke, once