Hunted Sorcery (Jon Oklar Book 2), B.T. Narro [digital book reader txt] 📗

“Have you ever considered that it’s normal to feel this anger?”

Normal? I was confused why that even mattered.

“Nothing is wrong, Jon,” Byron specified. “You don’t need to direct this anger at anyone in particular. In fact, you shouldn’t. You just need to recognize that it’s a part of losing your father in the way that you lost him. You must accept the anger, just like you must accept the sadness that his death has brought you. It is the only way I have learned to deal with the death of my father, who was taken from me brutally when I was around your age.”

“What happened?”

“He was stabbed in the back right next to me.”

“That’s awful.”

Byron nodded. “I was angry for a long time, first at the man who did it, then at myself for not stopping it.”

“But how could you have known it would happen?”

“I couldn’t have, but I still blamed myself. I even blamed my father at times. I told myself he should’ve known it might happen and taken more measures to protect himself. But this just made me angry at him.”

“I see the similarities.” I had been furious with my father for moving us so far away from Tryn.

“You will be angry and sad, but it gets easier the more that you learn to accept it.” Byron put up his hands. “I’m not saying the acceptance of these emotions is ever easy. It’s not. You will struggle with this as you have already, but in time you will become more accepting. You will think about your father more fondly and less painfully because he was a good man. And I’m sure he was a good father.”

Something broke inside me, a dam bursting. It took all of my strength not to weep in front of the head guard of the capital, a man I had just met. But I managed to hold it in out of fear of bringing shame on myself.

I had developed ways to get past the anger and sadness. I found it best to stop the thoughts as soon as they came, focusing on my breathing, my surroundings—anything but the loneliness. The more times I successfully disconnected the cycle of misery, the easier it was to stop it in the future. But I had never learned to accept my emotions. They used to hurt too much for me to live with before, but I was stronger now. It was time to stop running from them.

I didn’t know what had come over me, but I was flooded with relief. I felt like this was the first time I’d been offered any real guidance since my father had died, and I had no idea how much I’d needed it.

You were not just a good father, Gage. You were my closest friend.

“Thank you, Byron,” I managed to get out as I took a few breaths to hold in the tears that tried to escape.

He nodded with a sad smile. “This conversation was long overdue. I’m sorry it took even this long. Unfortunately, I really must be leaving now. For the next two nights, you will take the post on the wall at Broad Street and Speedwell. It’s the closest post to the castle. Another watcher will relieve you after two hours from the beginning of your shift. I don’t expect you to see anyone attempting to enter the city after sundown, but you know the rules. No one enters, but they are permitted to leave. Any questions?”

As frustrated as I continued to be about this punishment, I reminded myself that it wasn’t Byron who had decided my penalty would continue. He was just following the king’s orders.

But there was something he was forgetting. “Sir, what about the tavern owner who seems to encourage the harassment of his serving girl?”

“Yes, that. Forgive me for forgetting. Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do myself to resolve that issue.”

I didn’t bother hiding my surprise and disappointment. “Nothing?”

“The laws are not on my side in this circumstance.”

“Forgive me if this isn’t my place, but can’t you change the laws?”

“The lord of the city makes the laws, and the lord of the capital is the king.” Byron had a hinting tone. “But that’s not to say that you couldn’t take the matter into your own hands. I trust whatever decision you make.”

I smiled. “I appreciate your trust.”

CHAPTER FIVE

I returned to training immediately after Byron left. During the moments when I rested my tired mind, I tried to think of a plan to teach Red a lesson. I was interrupted a short time later by the sound of someone walking up the stairs to my allotted training quarters in the great hall. They stopped and knocked on the wall of the stairway before I could see them.

“Jon, may I enter? It’s Callie.”

“Of course,” I said.

The princess looked at me with irritation when she made it to the top of the stairs. I had a feeling I knew why she was upset. I hadn’t seen or spoken to her since she had agreed to help me trick her father. I hadn’t been able to thank her for her help, which she undoubtedly deserved.

Her father had told me that she had become spoiled recently—that she thought the heart of every boy already belonged to her—and he thought my dismissal of her affection might fix that situation somewhat. I had promised her father that I would not show her any sign of affection, but that didn't mean I had to be rude to her.

“Princess,” I said with a bow. “This is long overdue, but I want to thank you. Without your help, I never would’ve found the troops from Rohaer in the forest. I’m frustrated it’s taken this long to give you the gratitude you deserve. Thank you.”

I offered my hand.

She shook it hesitantly, keeping her gaze on my face.

“If that’s true, why didn’t you visit me earlier?” she asked.

“I haven’t been permitted to walk around the castle freely. The king doesn’t wish