Laird's Choice, Remmy Duchene [superbooks4u .txt] 📗

against the counter across the kitchen. There was a heat coming from Laird's body that clouded his senses and weakened his knees. Folding his arms over his chest, he took a breath and leveled his eyes on Laird wondering if he should do what his mind was telling him.

"His name was Shane…" Race reported, fingering the pendant. "He was my brother."

Laird's eyebrow shot up. "What are you talking about?"

"The man they accused me of killing."

"They accused you of murdering your own

brother?"

Race nodded, paying close attention to Laird's

expressions.

"Well that makes no sense. I mean sometimes I feel like murdering my brothers, especially the little one, but I would never…"

"It wasn't supposed to happen you know. Shane wasn't supposed to die but he kept some really bad company. I mean, I was the bad seed. The one who lied about my age to get my first tattoo when I was fifteen. The one everyone thought would end up dead in an alley somewhere. Not Shane—he was taking grade twelve

calculus in grade nine… he was the smart one. One night he went to a party. He told my mother he was going to study, but I knew something was wrong. Shane was a horrible liar. When he lied, he couldn't keep eye contact; he started sweating and stuttering. So, I followed him. I watched from the darkness, and everything was fine, until a fight broke out. Someone jumped on my brother and the anger just welled inside me like a balloon. I just couldn't control it. I jumped in to get my brother, to protect him but something went wrong. There was a loud bang…"

The sound echoed through Race's head again, just

as loud as the night it'd happened. He caught his breath, willing his ears to stop ringing. He felt Laird's hand, gentle on his shoulder, and he couldn't command the strength to pull away. "I stopped and looked around for Shane but I couldn't find him. Everyone was screaming and running. I called his name and that's when I saw the gun on the ground. I didn't know what to do, I picked it up. I just stood there—staring down at this heavy thing in my hand. Then he said my name…"

"Race…"

But once the words started tumbling from his lips, Race couldn't seem to stop them. He swallowed the lump in his throat and lifted his eyes at Laird. "My brother, the only person I loved more than anything in my whole pathetic life. I loved him always, especially those times when I didn't even like myself and there he was looking so pale and dying in my arms. I knew he was dying because he was bleeding too much. I took off my shirt and pressed it against the wound but he only screamed in pain. But no matter how much he cried out to me, I couldn't take pressure off. I had to stop the bleeding."

He paused. "I felt it the moment he was gone. There is a certain dread and overwhelming loss that comes when you watch someone you love die. Anger was the only thing I could feel after I caught my breath. I couldn't understand why Shane, who'd never harmed anyone, would die and I was still alive. I couldn't understand it. I still don't understand. The next thing I know someone was pulling me away and all I could think to do then was run."

"That's when Xavier came after you."

"You know Xavier?"

"Yes. He's my brother's boyfriend."

Race nodded. "Yeah, X had his team come after me because he was afraid someone else would get gun happy.

We weren't best friends but we got along. My life was over after that. We thought justice would prevail—it took eight years. Now what am I supposed to do? They gave me fifty million dollars… but all that's useless to me now. I can't even find a man without my past coming back to haunt me."

* * * *

Laird stepped closer and gripped Race's hips. He

pulled his body into the cowboy's and took a breath. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry you had to go through that and I am very sorry I was such a moron. I just—it was a lot of

information and it all hit me at the exact same time."

"I should have understood that. But I just couldn't get over being rejected again. The truth is, Laird, you can't have me around. I don't know if I can get over someone looking at me like I'm some kind of monster and not get angry. I am so damn angry all the time and so far it's just been simmering."

"Did you mourn your brother?"

"I—I couldn't. The guilt that was inside me—that is still inside me—won't let me."

"Don't you think it's time you do that? He can't blame you, Race. You did nothing wrong. You tried to save him even though it broke your heart because it caused him pain. He's your brother. No matter what you do he loves you."

"How do you know that?"

Laird chuckled. "I know it's not the same thing but even when Rajan and Savaro make me mad enough to

literally push steam out my ears, I still love them with almost everything in me."

Race smiled at him and Laird's breath caught in his throat. He lifted a hand to caress Race's cheek.

"Give me another chance, Race. Come home with me."

"Do you think that's the best of ideas?"

Laird groaned, dragging a finger over Race's nipple and stopping slightly to hook his nail beneath the nipple ring through his shirt. "I've missed you. I've missed your body. I've missed…" Laird took a breath, snaked a hand down Race's body and grabbed his cock, "…this."

Race gasped. "It can't be this easy."

Laird watched as the cowboy's head slipped

backwards each time he added pressure to Race's quickly hardening cock. His large body trembled and Laird inched closer. "Of course it can. I have these feelings for you and I know you have them too or you wouldn't be