Shirley, Charlotte Brontë [free children's ebooks online .txt] 📗

but that wilder solitude which lies out of doors, and which she could chase, mounted on Zoë, her mare. She took long rides of half a day. Her uncle disapproved, but he dared not remonstrate. It was never pleasant to face Shirley’s anger, even when she was healthy and gay; but now that her face showed thin, and her large eye looked hollow, there was something in the darkening of that face and kindling of that eye which touched as well as alarmed.

To all comparative strangers who, unconscious of the alterations in her spirits, commented on the alteration in her looks, she had one reply⁠—

“I am perfectly well; I have not an ailment.”

And health, indeed, she must have had, to be able to bear the exposure to the weather she now encountered. Wet or fair, calm or storm, she took her daily ride over Stilbro’ Moor, Tartar keeping up at her side, with his wolf-like gallop, long and untiring.

Twice, three times, the eyes of gossips⁠—those eyes which are everywhere, in the closet and on the hilltop⁠—noticed that instead of turning on Rushedge, the top ridge of Stilbro’ Moor, she rode forwards all the way to the town. Scouts were not wanting to mark her destination there. It was ascertained that she alighted at the door of one Mr. Pearson Hall, a solicitor, related to the vicar of Nunnely. This gentleman and his ancestors had been the agents of the Keeldar family for generations back. Some people affirmed that Miss Keeldar was become involved in business speculations connected with Hollow’s Mill⁠—that she had lost money, and was constrained to mortgage her land. Others conjectured that she was going to be married, and that the settlements were preparing.

Mr. Moore and Henry Sympson were together in the schoolroom. The tutor was waiting for a lesson which the pupil seemed busy in preparing.

“Henry, make haste. The afternoon is getting on.”

“Is it, sir?”

“Certainly. Are you nearly ready with that lesson?”

“No.”

“Not nearly ready?”

“I have not construed a line.”

Mr. Moore looked up. The boy’s tone was rather peculiar.

“The task presents no difficulties, Henry; or, if it does, bring them to me. We will work together.”

“Mr. Moore, I can do no work.”

“My boy, you are ill.”

“Sir, I am not worse in bodily health than usual, but my heart is full.”

“Shut the book. Come hither, Harry. Come to the fireside.”

Harry limped forward. His tutor placed him in a chair; his lips were quivering, his eyes brimming. He laid his crutch on the floor, bent down his head, and wept.

“This distress is not occasioned by physical pain, you say, Harry? You have a grief; tell it me.”

“Sir, I have such a grief as I never had before. I wish it could be relieved in some way; I can hardly bear it.”

“Who knows but, if we talk it over, we may relieve it? What is the cause? Whom does it concern?”

“The cause, sir, is Shirley; it concerns Shirley.”

“Does it? You think her changed?”

“All who know her think her changed⁠—you too, Mr. Moore.”

“Not seriously⁠—no. I see no alteration but such as a favourable turn might repair in a few weeks; besides, her own word must go for something: she says she is well.”

“There it is, sir. As long as she maintained she was well, I believed her. When I was sad out of her sight, I soon recovered spirits in her presence. Now⁠—”

“Well, Harry, now. Has she said anything to you? You and she were together in the garden two hours this morning. I saw her talking, and you listening. Now, my dear Harry, if Miss Keeldar has said she is ill, and enjoined you to keep her secret, do not obey her. For her life’s sake, avow everything. Speak, my boy.”

“She say she is ill! I believe, sir, if she were dying, she would smile, and aver, ‘Nothing ails me.’ ”

“What have you learned then? What new circumstance?”

“I have learned that she has just made her will.”

“Made her will?”

The tutor and pupil were silent.

“She told you that?” asked Moore, when some minutes had elapsed.

“She told me quite cheerfully, not as an ominous circumstance, which I felt it to be. She said I was the only person besides her solicitor, Pearson Hall, and Mr. Helstone and Mr. Yorke, who knew anything about it; and to me, she intimated, she wished specially to explain its provisions.”

“Go on, Harry.”

“ ‘Because,’ she said, looking down on me with her beautiful eyes⁠—oh! they are beautiful, Mr. Moore! I love them! I love her! She is my star! Heaven must not claim her! She is lovely in this world, and fitted for this world. Shirley is not an angel; she is a woman, and she shall live with men. Seraphs shall not have her! Mr. Moore, if one of the ‘sons of God,’ with wings wide and bright as the sky, blue and sounding as the sea, having seen that she was fair, descended to claim her, his claim should be withstood⁠—withstood by me⁠—boy and cripple as I am.”

“Henry Sympson, go on, when I tell you.”

“ ‘Because,’ she said, ‘if I made no will, and died before you, Harry, all my property would go to you; and I do not intend that it should be so, though your father would like it. But you,’ she said, ‘will have his whole estate, which is large⁠—larger than Fieldhead. Your sisters will have nothing; so I have left them some money, though I do not love them, both together, half so much as I love one lock of your fair hair.’ She said these words, and she called me her ‘darling,’ and let me kiss her. She went on to tell me that she had left Caroline Helstone some money too; that this manor house, with its furniture and books, she had bequeathed to me, as she did not choose to take the old family place from her own blood; and that all the rest of her property, amounting to about twelve thousand pounds, exclusive of the legacies to my sisters and Miss Helstone, she had willed, not to me, seeing I