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of the time she barely spoke when I walked past her.

‘I’m making your favourite tonight. Sausages, mash, and onion gravy,’ she said with a smile. I was beginning to enjoy seeing one on her face. It made her look younger, somehow. It was also refreshing to see her without a glass of wine in her hand.

‘Are they best sausages?’ I asked. ‘I don’t like it when they have gristle in.’

‘I know that, son. I fetched ’em myself from the butchers. They’re Cumberland, too, not the Lincolnshire ones.’

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Mum really had been taking notice of me all these years. Maybe I really should have given up all my peculiar ways; perhaps things would have been better for us all—Grandad included. He would love that we were getting along for the first time in years. I really would try to change my odd habits from now on. If Mum could continue to make an effort, then so could I. I liked having a proper mum taking care of me. I know Tina had tried her best, but it wasn’t the same. Plus, I was about to dive deep into the adult world, and I didn’t have as much time for following people right now. The only person I wanted to follow was The Suit.

As I set the table for tea, I could feel it in my bones that things were getting better. We were going to improve together. I hoped one day soon I could look at all my family again—especially Mum, but that would take some time.

As we sat at the table, everyone talked and smiled like there had never been anything wrong with our little family. We had so much to look forward to with the arrival of Tina’s baby and with Grandad rejuvenating the family business. Things couldn’t look any rosier for us. He told me he had two more jobs booked in for Monday, and it would be a busy day for us. Mum even talked about getting a part-time job, which caused Grandad and me to exchange another surprised glance.

I only needed to find out what was going on in the little antique shop, then all my worries would be behind me.

Everything was going to be perfect.

Chapter Thirteen

I spent my days off keeping myself busy. I read the library books I’d borrowed as a distraction and because I wanted to prove to Tina and Pete the baby would be safe in my hands, should they ever need a babysitter. I also studied the journal entries I’d made. I hadn’t realised how many people I’d followed until I flicked back through it. Since I’d started writing in it, I’d followed close to two hundred people, and that didn’t include those I’d shadowed before I’d even thought of starting a journal.

The weird dreams continued to taunt me whenever I slept, though—except the endings were different now. Instead of The Suit turning and pointing his fingers at me, he now held the guns in his hands and aimed them at my chest.

On Sunday morning, I washed my bloody denim jacket. Mum even helped with my laundry. Thankfully, she didn’t spot the blood; it would have been hard to explain what happened to her.

In the afternoon, Tina and Pete came round. She didn’t eat much, said she got her morning sickness in the afternoon and struggled to keep anything down. Mum fussed over her and gave her tips on how to ease the queasiness in her stomach. When I was washing and tidying up the kitchen, Tina came to talk to me.

‘It’s like she’s had a personality transplant.’ She laughed. ‘What have you been slipping in her tea?’ she asked.

‘Me? Nothing,’ I frowned.

‘I know, I know, JC. It’s only a joke.’

‘Okay,’ I said, wiping down all the surfaces.

‘It is nice to see. It’s like we’ve got the old Mum back,’ she said.

‘You’ve always had the same mum, Tina. It’s me who’s had a different one to you.’

She stepped back and clutched her neck. ‘JC…’

‘What? Did you think I never noticed how different she was with me compared to you?’

‘Well… I… never thought you looked at things in that way.’

‘I didn’t. Not back then, anyway. But things have become clearer; matters and words that have been said in the past are finally slotting into place, and I understand them now.’

‘You do?’

‘Yes, there’s a whole list of things. But I’ve decided to forgive and forget and be better for our family’s sake, and for the new baby.’

Tina’s hand drifted from her neck, down to her stomach. She smiled fondly. ‘Wow, John-Michael. I never thought I’d see the day. You’re finally becoming a man.’

I slammed down the tray I was holding. ‘That’s the problem, Tina. I’ve been a man for a long time, but everyone around here still treats me like a child!’

‘JC, that’s not true at all!’ she said.

‘It most certainly is! I’m always kept in the dark or waved away when important matters are discussed. I’m tired of being treated this way.’

‘JC… I… I don’t know what to say.’

‘What can you say?’ I shrugged. ‘You will never understand what it’s like for me.’

Her pretty green eyes glinted in the reflection on the window as they filled with tears.

I turned to face her but kept my head down. ‘I’m sorry, Tina, I didn’t mean to upset you. Can I give you a hug?’

She laughed. ‘Of course, you can, JC. Come here.’

I wrapped her in a giant bear hug. It warmed my heart to have prolonged contact with my sister. I never wanted to shy away from physical contact again.

*

Tuesday morning came around, and new energy ran through me. I almost skipped to the shop, eager to find out more about the guns.

The bell above the door rang as I entered. Mr Phillips was whistling a merry tune as he walked around the shop with a dance in his step, writing in his ledger.

‘Good morning, Mr Phillips,’ I said, bemused at his sudden change in

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