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open. For some reason it feels safer to have it that way.

Sandy has always been shy. There have been times when she reminded me of myself when I was her age.

Not you. Of Sean, a voice whispers at the back of my mind. Right. Right right right.

Miss Levin doesn’t answer.

“Sandy’s never brought up any of this with me, Miss Levin. I haven’t seen anything happen in my class—and if I had, believe me, I’d bring it to the principal’s attention right away.”

“You didn’t know?” Her face darkens. “You didn’t notice?”

I pause. “Miss Levin, I’m not sure what you mean.”

I study her face. And that’s when I realize she’s afraid of me.

“Have you spoken with Mrs. Condrey?” I ask tentatively.

“Sandy said it’s someone in your class.”

“My class? Who?”

“Someone named Sean.”

The classroom constricts. It won’t settle. It won’t stop spinning. Every picture on the wall comes to life, the finger paintings and stick figures turning their heads toward me, sucking the oxygen out of the room, until there’s nothing to breathe.

“Sandy told me it all started when you taught them how to play that …that game.”

“Game? What game?” But I know her answer before she responds.

“Horsey.”

INTERVIEW: April 7, 1983

KINDERMAN: Can I show you something, Sean? I don’t know if I told you this, but I am an inventor. I can make all kinds of special machines and super cool devices that can do all kinds of neat things. Like this…I call it the Bad Snatcher. You ever make a cootie catcher?

CRENSHAW: (Nods.)

KINDERMAN: This is like that, but real. Kinda looks like a telephone, doesn’t it?

CRENSHAW: Yeah.

KINDERMAN: See this part? That’s where you talk into it. The difference with this kind of telephone, what makes it so special, is that when you call somebody with it, if there’s something that makes you sad, it takes all that sad stuff and bad stuff and disappears it. Poof. All gone.

CRENSHAW: Really?

KINDERMAN: All you have to do is talk into this part—this part right here—and it’ll take all that stuff you don’t want inside of you and sucks it all out. Kinda like a vacuum, you know? Does your mom vacuum around the house a lot?

CRENSHAW: (Nods.)

KINDERMAN: Does your house get really dirty? All that dirt and all those dust bunnies hide under your bed? Your mom plugs in her vacuum and sluuurps all the dirty stuff away and the house is all clean again? That’s exactly what the Bad Snatcher does. It slurps all the dirt and dust inside us. Because people are like houses, too. We want to be clean. Spotless. But sometimes, some things inside us, the secrets, they make us feel a little dirty…Do you ever feel dirty, Sean?

CRENSHAW: (…)

KINDERMAN: We all feel dirty sometimes. It’s good to have a special device like the Bad Snatcher. The Bad Snatcher takes all the bad stuff away so that we can feel clean again. All you have to do is lean in and talk into the phone part here.

CRENSHAW: (…)

KINDERMAN: You can even whisper into it, if you want. You don’t have to worry about anyone else listening in. Even me. It’s just you and the Bad Snatcher.

CRENSHAW: (Leans in, examines the microphone.)

KINDERMAN: Have you ever talked into a tape recorder before? Maybe your mommy has one, or somebody at school has one, or maybe a friend?

CRENSHAW: Mark has a tape recorder.

KINDERMAN: Oh, good! What do you do with it?

CRENSHAW: We tape ourselves.

KINDERMAN: When you recorded yourself and played it back how did it sound?

CRENSHAW: Like somebody else.

KINDERMAN: It does, doesn’t it? It’s hard to recognize your own voice. Almost like someone else is saying it…That’s what the Bad Snatcher does, too.

CRENSHAW: Your machine does that?

KINDERMAN: It does. All the secrets, all the dirt and dust inside you…it takes it away and it never comes back. Good as new. Clean. Wanna give it a try?

CRENSHAW: Okay.

KINDERMAN: Great! All right. Let’s think of something that feels really stuck inside. Something that you might’ve thought you’re not allowed to tell anybody…

CRENSHAW: I pushed Jason in the lunch line when he tried to cut.

KINDERMAN: Yeah, but I’m talking about big secrets, Sean. That’s just a crumb! What about the stuff you told the policeman? Do you remember that?

CRENSHAW: (Pauses. Nods.)

KINDERMAN: That was a pretty big secret! And I’m worried if you hold on to stuff like that for too long, you’re gonna start feeling very dirty inside. Very, very dirty. You might never feel clean again. Because that’s what happens when we hold onto a secret for too long, Sean. It changes the way we feel about ourselves forever. That dirty, grimy feeling never goes away. It’ll be inside you for the rest of your life. Can you imagine living in a house that your mommy never vacuums? You have to clean yourself, Sean. You have to let those secrets out. All of them.

CRENSHAW: (…)

KINDERMAN: Tell me what happened in Mr. Woodhouse’s classroom.

CRENSHAW: (…)

KINDERMAN: I don’t think you understand the seriousness of this situation, Sean. People are getting hurt. Children like you…Do you want any more children to get hurt, Sean? Do you?

CRENSHAW: No…

KINDERMAN: Then you need to tell me everything that happened with Mr. Woodhouse. You need to stop him and his yucky friends from letting this continue. They’re out there, Sean. Right now. More than we know. More than we can count. Hiding in plain sight. Do you want to help?

CRENSHAW: (Crying:) I want my mommy…

KINDERMAN: Stop crying.

CRENSHAW: I want my mommy!

KINDERMAN: No, Sean. You don’t get to hide. You started this. You were a brave boy before, but now you’re just being a little fraidy-cat. You can’t be afraid now, Sean. It’s too late. You need to be brave. You need to be clean. Come clean.

CRENSHAW: I…I want to be…I want to be clean.

KINDERMAN: How about this. I’m gonna give you the Bad Snatcher. I’ll let you hold it, all by yourself. I’m gonna leave the room for a little while. No one else will be listening. You can tell it anything…and it’ll be

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