Confessions from the Quilting Circle, Maisey Yates [animal farm read TXT] 📗

in his arms flexing. And she couldn’t help but notice. “Sometimes I think I didn’t have a thought in my head until I was maybe... Twenty-five years old. And everything before that was just acting and reacting. I was with Keira so I thought that I should be. And I was sure that I was in love, because we slept with each other and had been together since we were fifteen. I thought that I should marry her because of all of that. It seemed like the right thing to do. And then there was you, and the way you were with me when I was heartbroken. And that confused me. Then you were gone, and she wanted me back. And I just reacted.” He shook his head. “People show you who they are, and you ought to pay attention. She left me once, and I think she probably should’ve gone with her gut and stayed gone. But I think like me she was scared. Scared not to take the next step because it was our plan. Because it was what everybody thought we were going to do. And I just... I just thought it was right. I thought it was right because we had done it. We got married. We had Taylor.”

The speech left her bruised, but it was honest. She could tell that it was honest. And fair, because he was right. About the way expectations from other people made choices for you before you were old enough to figure out what you wanted, and what the whole world was. Who you were in it.

“Were you happy?”

He looked up, the lines around his eyes suddenly seeming deeper. “I had everything I thought I should have. I owned my own business, bought a house, a really nice house. I enjoy my job, Lark, even if it’s not a fancy job. I like fixing things. I like working with my hands. And the whole time I didn’t notice my relationship was broken. But when you live with somebody for that long you can forget to talk to each other. And we just didn’t. I mean, we talked. About the day, about how Taylor was doing at school, and Taylor’s friends, and when we would let her get her driver’s license, and if she could get her nose pierced. But we didn’t really talk. And there was a point where I thought we had everything, and she didn’t. I wish like hell that she would’ve just talked to me, but I can’t really blame it all on her.”

Lark held her breath. “But were you happy?”

He looked up at her, those familiar eyes burning into hers. “I don’t remember what happy feels like.”

There was something about that statement, simple and flat that landed hard inside of her. She leaned against her car, with him still leaning against the workbench, a couple feet of empty concrete between them. And a whole lot of years. But he had been her best friend once, and she had been his. And mostly, she just... She felt the same way sometimes. She wanted to tell him about Avery. There were a lot of things that she wanted to tell him. But as they looked at each other, the air between them seemed to shift, and her breath caught.

And this had nothing to do with emotions. With bad feelings or what had happened with Avery. With the fight they just had, or with what had happened all those years ago.

It was just still this.

It was just still there.

“When will you have the car done?”

“Tomorrow sometime. Do you need a ride back home?”

She shook her head. “The walk will be good.”

He took a step toward her, and she took a step back. “Okay,” he said.

“Bye.”

She walked out the door quickly, shoving her hands in her pockets and moving down the street, away from him. Away from... All of that.

There was too much going on in her life to indulge in any kind of attraction to him. It was too much of a minefield.

Ben Thompson had only ever been a path to heartbreak. And she was here to heal.

And now, Avery needed her. It wasn’t the time to be focused on herself.

Too bad her heart was still beating twice as fast as it needed to be. Making a mockery of all of her common sense.

He always has.

At least she hadn’t kissed him.

But oh, how she’d wanted to.

14

I lived in the same city all my life. Even moving from my parents’ home to my husband’s was not so different. Here, everything is different. But I am learning to find the familiar in each new place we stop. The grass, the flowers, and John. The sun and his friendship make me feel like less of a stranger in this world.

Anabeth Snow’s diary, 1864

Avery

Avery was up and out early with the kids, on the promise of breakfast at the diner near the school.

“This is weird.” Hayden didn’t look up from his coffee. He drank coffee, because he felt like it was grown-up, but Avery knew that he would still rather have a hot chocolate. But she never argued with him when he ordered it.

She ached for both of her kids. And that was her focus right now. Not thinking about what she was doing. Not thinking about herself. Or about what had happened last night with her family. But about them.

Yes, things weren’t ideal right now between herself and David.

Her stomach went sour.

She replayed the reel of not right that had been happening for years now.

Being pushed against the wall.

Shoved backward.

Her head cracking against the side table by the door, sending it hard into the drywall and leaving a gouge in the wall.

Last night it had felt like the world had unraveled. They knew.

They knew.

She had no idea how she’d made it through the night and she’d thanked God that David was out late, because if she’d had to talk to him she didn’t know what she’d do.

She’d sat in the bottom