The Woman with the Blue Star, Pam Jenoff [highly recommended books txt] 📗

to do nothing while thousands die.” His eyes grew dark and stormy. “It’s so much worse than everyone thinks, Ella. Thousands upon thousands of people have been arrested and imprisoned in labor camps.”

“You’re talking about the Jews.” I saw Sadie’s face in my mind.

“Mostly, yes. But it isn’t just them. They’ve arrested priests and professors and Roma and homosexuals.” My heart cried out, thinking of Maciej. Surely things couldn’t be that bad in Paris as well. But once I had thought the same about Kraków, and after all of the horrible things I’d witnessed these past few months, I knew that nowhere was safe. Krys continued, “They aren’t really just being sent to labor camps, like the Germans say. They’re being shot in quarries and forests, or sent to death camps right here in Poland where they are being killed in large numbers with gas.” I inhaled sharply. I’d seen the cruelty with my own eyes when I witnessed the woman jumping from the bridge with her own children, heard about the camps from one of the Germans at Ana Lucia’s lunch. But that had not prepared me for the horrors Krys now shared.

“But surely the Allies will stop them.” For so long, we had heard about the advancing armies from the east and south, racing to our aid. Just hold on; that had been the message.

He shook his head. “They’re trying. But we need help here faster than they can manage. So many die while we wait. And what if they don’t succeed?” The thought, which had come to me more than once in the dark hours of the night, was more than I could bear. I could not imagine living this way forever.

“We have to do something,” he finished. A steely look formed in his azure blue eyes and I could see that he had found his true purpose, a newfound strength. I hated how it had taken him from me, but I knew that he was doing the work he was meant to do. I looked up at Krys with admiration. He would not have let Miriam and the other Jewish students be taken from his class. He would have done something to help the woman on the bridge. And he would help Sadie now. I wanted to tell him about her, but the words stuck in my throat.

“Now are you going to tell me what you were doing in this neighborhood again?” he asked, changing the subject back to me without warning.

I hesitated. He had confided so much. I should be honest with him as he had been with me. But Sadie’s secret was not mine to tell. “Just running an errand,” I insisted. He looked at me skeptically and I could feel the distance grow between us once more.

“Now that you know about my work, you could help us,” he said.

“Me?” I was surprised.

“Yes. Women are very useful to the Home Army because they can act as couriers and go more places without suspicion. There are errands in the city and beyond. Or we might be able to use Ana Lucia’s closeness to the Germans to get information for the Home Army. You could make a real difference, Ella.” I was flattered that Krys might think of me that way.

“You said it was too dangerous.”

“It is dangerous,” he admitted. “That’s why I tried to keep away from you and not tell you about my work. But you know now. And the Home Army needs help more than ever. Perhaps we could work together,” he added. “What do you say?”

I desperately wanted to say yes, to be in his life once more. But something held me back. I wasn’t brave, like Krys. Part of me was afraid. Slipping some food to help someone in hiding was one thing, but risking my life for the Home Army quite another. I didn’t dare risk my stepmother’s wrath, any more so than I already was by going to see Sadie. “I can’t,” I said finally. “I wish I could. I’m sorry.”

Krys’ face fell. “Me, too. I understand how terrifying this all must sound. Still, I thought you would say yes. I thought that you were different.” I was different now, I wanted to say, with secrets of my own. But I could not explain without betraying Sadie. I felt the distance rise up and solidify between us again like an iceberg, the moment of closeness gone. “It’s all dangerous, Ella.” His words were pointed and I wondered if he knew about Sadie after all. “We might as well stand up and be counted.” I did not answer. “I should be going,” he said.

“Goodbye, Krys,” I said. I wished we were not parting poorly again, but he had his reasons for what he was doing and I had mine. I turned and started up the riverbank before he could, wanting to be the one to leave.

I did not go home, though. I pretended to start for the bridge. But when I looked behind me and Krys was no longer there, I slipped away and into Dębniki once more. As I made my way toward the square, I thought about all Krys had told me. He had found his purpose, but in a world that would not let us be together. I walked a long loop around the neighborhood and then doubled back to the alleyway, checking to make sure that Krys had not followed me and that the Germans had gone. Then, despite everything that had happened, I returned to the grate.

It was more than an hour past when Sadie and I usually met. Yet miraculously, she was there, waiting for me. “Hello,” I said brightly. For all that had happened that day, I was still glad to see her. Then, taking in her solemn face, my concern grew. “Are you all right?”

“Yes, fine. Only you can’t come here again,” she said, and I knew then she had seen the Germans and heard our exchange. “It’s too dangerous, you coming