Lord Of Danger, Stuart, Anne [my miracle luna book free read txt] 📗

blew through the arrow loopholes. The noise and music from the Great Hall receded in the distance as she climbed.

She had to be mad. Was she really going to barge in on Simon of Navarre and ask him about the state of his genitals? It was one thing to tell her sister that she planned to do it, another actually to accomplish the deed.

She was tired of being a quiet little mouse. She was tired of rumors and whispers and hushed threats. She was tired of lies.

Of course, there was always the chance that it wasn’t a lie. She paused on the landing, leaning against the cold stone wall as she considered that unlikely possibility.

What would she do? Would it be cause to rejoice, as Claire had said? He wouldn’t be able to possess her, deflower her. For all her convent upbringing she knew perfectly well what went on between men and women. She’d even seen them coupling in corners in the Great Hall, in the stable yards. The thought of doing that with Simon of Navarre was both terrifying and fascinating.

But maybe she wouldn’t be doing that with anyone at all. If Richard married her to an impotent man, she would live out her life in chastity, like the very nun she had wanted to be. Surely that was cause to rejoice?

And hadn’t he told her she could bestow her favors where she wished? Perhaps it had been his way of telling her he had no use for them himself.

It was driving her mad. She wasn’t afraid to know the truth, and she wasn’t afraid to ask him. At least, not much.

His servant lay outside the door, and his eyes opened as Alys approached. He was a gentle looking man, though Alys suspected he could be quite fierce in defense of his lord, and he scrambled to his feet as she drew closer.

“I wished to see…” she began, but he’d already opened the door for her, and she let her words trail off, moving ahead before her nerves could fail her.

He stood at a makeshift table, not bothering to look up as the door closed behind her. This time she didn’t make the mistake of thinking he wasn’t fully aware of her.

“Your servant let me in,” she said.

He didn’t look up. “Godfrey has orders to admit you whenever you come looking for me. How may I help you, Lady Alys? Were you seeking another lesson in herbalism? Or are you perhaps interested in alchemy?”

“Alchemy?” she said, momentarily and gratefully distracted from her quest. “You are versed in the alchemic arts? Can you make gold?”

“I know any number of things,” he said, and he looked up at her. His hair was pushed back from his face, and his golden eyes were still and watchful. “What were you wishing to learn?”

The question jumped to mind, but stopped at her lips. She moved into the room, doing her best to appear casually interested in her surroundings. If she didn’t know better she’d think he was amused. That he had guessed what information she was in search of, and he found it entertaining.

“How is your sister? Is she recovered from her ordeal?” he asked, watching her as she circled the room.

“As well as can be expected. She’s very angry right now.”

“A healthy sign,” Simon said. “And what of you? You seem to be plagued with a disordered mind this evening, Lady Alys. What is disturbing you?”

No, she couldn’t come right out and ask him. She was just as big a coward as she’d always thought.

Stalling for time, she moved to the cushioned chair and sat down, pulling her long skirts out of the way. Claire was right, she thought absently. It really was an astonishingly ugly dress.

“Why do you wish to marry me?” she asked abruptly.

He leaned against the table, surveying her. “For the usual reasons.”

“And what are they? Because you care for me? Because you want children to carry on your lineage?”

He threw back his head and laughed, and the sound was hateful.“How very young you are, Lady Alys. I tend to forget that. People marry for money and power, my child. Not for love. You come with a generous dowry and a blood connection to the royal family of England. Whereas I am a traveler, with no lands or family that I care to claim. Your properties will give me stability and respectability.”

“I doubt anything could give you respectability,” she muttered.

He looked amused. “No? I expect you’re right.”

“And how will I benefit from this marriage? What will be my great boon? How will it differ from the life of a nun?” She couldn’t have asked him any more plainly, and she waited impatiently for his answer.

She shouldn’t have underestimated him. “You’ll have far less power,” he said. “If you’d stayed in the convent I imagine you would have ended up an abbess. Perhaps even a saint. Married to me you’ll end up martyred like most women, without the public praise to go with it.”

“Will I have children?” She waited, holding her breath.

The glint in his eye was by no means pleasant. “I would suppose anything is possible if you arrange things wisely.” He moved closer, leaning over her, putting his strong left hand on the arm of the chair. “Let me ask you again, sweet Alys. Why are you here?”

She stared up at him, hands clasped tightly in her lap, lost in the wicked gleam in his golden eyes. He wouldn’t let her escape, she knew it, without admitting what she sought. “They have said…” she began. “… there are rumors… that is to say… I wanted to know…”

He waited, saying nothing, merciless, and finally her temper was roused.

“I wanted to know if you were capable of fathering children,” she said in a furious rush, feeling the color flood her face. She lowered her head, refusing to look him in the eye, embarrassed and angry and miserable.

He didn’t move, and she knew with sudden certainty that he wouldn’t answer her until