Sheriff Daddy (Montana Daddies Book 10), Laylah Roberts [tohfa e dulha read online .txt] 📗

A weird feeling filled her stomach. She didn’t like the idea of being in charge of him.

“I could be your slave for the day,” he offered.

She shook her head frantically.

“No?”

“No. I don’t . . . don’t make me . . . I don’t want to.”

“Shit, baby. Shit. I didn’t mean to scare you. Christ.” He stood between her legs and gathered her against his chest. “Hey, hey, fuck, I’m sorry. Shh. You’re okay. Nothing happens that you don’t want it to. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

She didn’t know why he was apologizing. All he’d done was offer her a way of punishing him and here she was freaking out over being in charge of him like that.

“Look at me.”

She gazed up into his stern eyes. They were a warm chocolate brown and in them all she saw was concern and understanding. And a bit of self-loathing. She didn’t want him to feel that way about himself.

“I’m sorry. I honestly didn’t realize that would upset you this much, but I should have guarded what I said. But I need something from you right now. Can you give me something?”

Absolutely. She nodded.

“Good girl. I want you to calm your breathing, okay?” He placed her hand on his chest. She could feel his chest move with each breath. Then he put his hand lightly on the front of her neck, his fingers resting on her pulse. “Just follow my breaths.”

“I’m not having a panic attack.” She knew what they felt like. Although she did find herself calming as she followed each of his breaths, mimicking them.

“I know. But your breathing was erratic enough to worry me. I’m supposed to be helping you manage your stress, not cause you more.”

“Not your fault. You didn’t know I’d freak out like an idiot.”

“Hush,” he said sternly. “No talking badly about yourself.”

“Another rule?”

“Another rule,” he said firmly. “Fuck. I’ve handled this badly.”

“Hush,” she repeated back to him.

He raised an eyebrow. How did he manage to look amused and stern?

“You didn’t handle this badly. I did.” She took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “The truth is, I like reading books about Daddy Doms and Littles. And I’ve done a lot of research into it. I even . . . I even joined a few online support groups for Littles.”

“I hope you were careful. You know how someone can pretend to be someone they’re not online. You didn’t give away any personal information, did you? You should never—”

She placed her hand over his mouth. “Ed, are you forgetting what I do for a living?”

He gave her a sheepish look. Then he licked the palm of her hand.

“Eek!” She snatched her hand back from his mouth.

“Sorry,” he said sheepishly.

“About what? Licking my hand?”

“Oh no, you deserved that. You should never put your hand over Daddy’s mouth. I mean, urgh, my mouth.”

A delicious pink tinge covered his cheeks at his slip-up. But the thing is, it didn’t feel like a slip-up. It felt right to her.

“I was always careful. But I had to know whether I was, whether I could be . . . ”

“A Little?”

“I have dreamed about finding a Daddy and I have dreaded it. Because I’m not supposed to be like this, darn it.” She slammed her fists down on her thighs.

“Hey, hurting yourself is not allowed, understand?” He took her hands in his.

“I wasn’t trying to hurt myself . . . not really.”

“Do you ever try to punish yourself?”

“You mean other than overthinking everything until I feel ill?”

“Shit, that’s not healthy.”

“Maybe I really do need a spanking. That’s what a punishment is meant to do, right? Rid you of guilt?”

“And hopefully prevent you from making the same mistake again.”

So maybe it would work for her. Because she was sick of feeling guilty for being a stuff-up, for not being a good James. For not being good enough. Less than perfect was not acceptable.

“Would you punish me for not doing something right? For not being good enough at something?”

His eyes flared. “No. Never.”

“Even if I asked for it?”

“Baby, that’s not something you should ever be punished for. There’s a vast difference between breaking a rule for your health and safety or a rule that’s for something you need help with and agree to, and being punished for not being . . .”

“Good enough?” she whispered.

He leaned his forehead against hers. “You are good enough. I don’t know where this is coming from, but Georgina Catherine, you are beautiful, brave, smart and you are better than good enough. You are everything.”

She closed her eyes. She wished she was. But she did feel his words placing a balm on the hurt to her soul. Silencing the voice inside, telling her that she’d never get it right. She knew exactly where that voice came from. She felt this way every time she talked to her mother.

“Where is this coming from?” he asked gently.

“My mother. She has a certain view on the way a James should act. And I frequently don’t live up to that view.”

“I know she’s your mother, so I don’t want to overstep, but fuck her.”

She gaped at him. Then she let out a giggle. “Oh God, sorry. I was just imagining her face if you said that to her.”

“Next time she tries to fill your head with bullshit like what you just spouted off to me, I will happily tell her that. If she’s being toxic, causing you to think bad things about yourself and you need a buffer, I’ll be that barrier. I’ll stand between you and the world if you need it. I’ll also stand behind you to be your support. What I won’t do is stand idly by while she abuses you.”

“It’s not abuse,” she protested.

“You sure about that? Granted, I don’t know it all. But from what you’ve just said . . . abuse isn’t always visible. It’s not always physical. I don’t think I need to tell you that.”

She sucked in a breath. He was right. But she still felt