Just Keep Breathing, GS Rhodes [best book club books for discussion TXT] 📗

They left the interview room, Caleb heading down the corridor to use the bathroom before they left. Zoe turned to Kidd immediately.

“You buy it?”

“The kid seems upset,” he replied. “I buy every word. We need to talk to his father.”

“And Sarah’s parents,” Zoe added. “We need to find out who she spoke to before she went back to his all upset. I’d put serious money on it being her sleaze bag of a dad.”

“You really don’t like him, do you?”

“He’s a twat.”

Kidd choked on a laugh. “Concise.”

“I’ll put it in the report.”

The door down the corridor opened and swung closed behind Caleb Kaye as he walked down the corridor towards them.

“I’ll get him signed out,” she said quietly. “Tell John I said hello.”

“How did you—?”

“You were staring all lovesick at your phone, I’m not blind,” she said with a wink. “Have a good night.”

He smiled. “You too.”

◆◆◆

DI Kidd left the station and messaged John to say that he was on his way.  John quickly replied asking him to meet him at the riverside. DI Kidd turned around and headed there, waiting under a streetlamp and staring out of the water, unable to keep thoughts of the case out of his mind.

One of Sarah’s parents had lied about the last time they saw her. Whatever happened when they saw her on Saturday felt important. That was what had driven her to not go home, to think that anywhere but home was safe. And what of Norman Kaye? They’d already gotten the impression from Alexandra Kaye that he was pretty unhinged, but hearing from the son that he had a temper didn’t sit right with Kidd either. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day, he could already feel it.

“Even from behind you look defeated,” John said as he stepped up next to Kidd.

Involuntarily, Kidd leaned over and kissed John quickly on the lips before going back to staring out at the water, staring over at the spot where Sarah had been found that morning. It had been quite a day. All he wanted to do right now was forget about it.

“Hello to you too,” he said, leaning on the railing next to him and stepping a little closer. Kidd could feel his body heat radiating and breathed in the calming scent of John McAdams. “You okay?”

Benjamin Kidd turned to John and took him in—his gorgeous open face, the little smile tugging at the corners of his mouth—and instantly felt a little calmer just because he was here. He didn’t want to rehash the details of his day right now, he just wanted to spend time with John. So he pushed it from his head as best he could and smiled.

“Better now you’re here,” he said. “Shall we?”

CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT

He didn’t know how much longer he could go on like this.

It hadn’t meant to go this far, he knew that from the start. Once she was in the house, he just wanted to scare her. He hadn’t expected her to run. He certainly hadn’t expected to have to run after her.

He still ached from it, not that he would say that to anyone. He wouldn’t want anyone getting suspicious. The only hope he had is that he wasn’t seen. So long as he wasn’t seen, everything would go to plan and everything would be alright.

He lay back in bed and stared at the ceiling, the white paint swirls overhead that were a little bit hypnotising in the streetlight pouring in through the crack in the curtain. He was tired, exhausted even, and no amount of counting sheep was going to help him drop off with all the things he had on his mind.

How much longer will it be? he thought.

He debated going out for a run just to ease his mind but thought better of it. It was cold out.

He picked up his phone, tapping out a message that he quickly deleted instead of sending.

His mind was all over the place.

She was dead.

It was a thought that made him sit up so sharply in bed that his head swam. She was dead. He’d seen it on the news, not that he’d needed to. He’d been there as the life had drained out of her body, drip drip dripping into the river, and floating off down the Thames.

Maybe I shouldn’t have left her there, he thought. All it would take was someone snooping around, a little bit of DNA left on her and they’d have me.

He had so much to lose.

His phone buzzed on the nightstand and his eyes widened as he saw the message. It hadn’t been what he wanted to see, it was the last thing he wanted to see. His pulse quickened, his breathing coming in ragged, quick.

Now he really was in trouble.

Without thinking, he got out of bed and pulled on his tracksuit, flicking the hood up over his head before he walked out of the house. The blood was rushing in his ears, rushing so much he wasn’t sure if anyone heard him leaving, if anyone saw him.

Sarah’s death had been an accident.

This one wouldn’t be.

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

After an evening of taking his mind off things with John, Kidd came into the office the following morning ready to tackle the day. When he made it into the Incident Room, he grabbed Sarah’s phone and unlocked it using the code that Sarah’s mother had provided.

“Check the messages,” DI Kidd said handing it to DC Ravel. “She had loads coming through last night while we were talking to Caleb, a never-ending stream, there has to be something in there.”

DC Ravel scrolled through, as Kidd watched over her shoulder, past the names that he recognised—Dexter, Taylor, Caleb, Jonno—and past a few more he didn’t, until she reached one marked Mum.

“Try those,” Kidd said.

DC Ravel clicked in and opened the messages. It was a stream of emotional messages asking her where she was. If you scrolled back far enough, you