The Hidden Garden, Gopi Narang [cheapest way to read ebooks txt] 📗

pehle kyonkar karuun

magar har qadam dil ko patthar karuun

dil e muztarib ashk e hasrat hua

jigar rukhstaane mein rukhsat hua

jigar jor e gardon se khuun ho gaya

mujhe rukte rukte junuun ho gaya

nazar raat ko chaand par gar pari

to goya k bijli si dil par pari

nazar aaii ik shakl mahtaab mein

kami aaii jis se khur o khwaab mein

use dekhon jiidhar karuun main nigah

vohi ek suurat hazaaron jagah

saraapa mein jis ja nazar kijiye

vahien u’mr apni basar kijiye

jo dekhuun to aankhon se lahu bahe

n dekhuun to ji par qayaamat rahe

kahien naqsh e diivaar dekha use

kahien garm raftaar dekha use

kabhu suurat dilkash apni dikhaaye

kabhu apne baalon mein munh ko chhupaaye

gale mein mere haath daale kabhu

tarah dushmani ki nikaale kabhu

har ik raat chande y suurat rahi

isi shakl-e vahmi se sohbat rahi

tabibon ko aakhir dikhaaya mujhe

n piina jo kuchh tha pilaaya mujhe

daron khud bakhud be-havaasi rahi

pareshaan dili aur udaasi rahi

kiya band kothari mein mujhe

k aatish junuun ki magar vaan bujhe

n aave koi dar se mere kane

k kya jaaniye kaisi sohbat bane

ghalat kaari-e vahm kuchh kam hui

vo sohbat jo rahti thi barham hui

vo suurat ka vahm aur divaangi

lagi karne darpardah begaangi

n dekhe meri or us pyaar se

gharibaana sar maare diivaar se

kahien tuk tassalli kahien be-qaraar

kahien shauq se mere be-ikhtiyaar

kahien dil apna dikhaave mujhe

meri befaaii jataave mujhe

n aaii kabhu phir nazar is tarah

n dekha use jalvah-gar is tarah

magar gaah saaya sa mahtaab mein

kabhu vahm sa aa’lam-e khwaab mein

mujhe aap ko yuun hi khote gaaii

javaani tamaam apni sote gaaii

dikhaaya n us mah ne ruu khwaab mein

n dekha phir us ko kabhu khwaab mein

bahut be-khud o be-khabar ho chuka

ham aaghosh-e taal’e bahut so chuka

lagi jaan si aane aa’zaa ke biich

koi roz rahna tha duniya ke biich

n dekha kabhu Mir phir vo jamaal

vo sohbat thi goya k khwaab o khayal

The moment I left Akbarabaad,

I looked at the walls and portals with my tear-filled eyes.

How would I leave the place that belongs to me?

How should I make my heart behave

like a stone, every step of the way?

My afflicted heart cried out loudly.

In this act of leaving, my heart too left me.

My heart sheds blood, suffering the cruelty of the heavens.

Slowly and gradually, I was possessed by madness.

At night, I looked at the moon, and I was struck.

It was like some lightning that hit me.

I had a new kind of dream.

I saw her wherever my eyes turned,

the same visage in thousands of places.

Wherever I saw that mystifying figure

was the place to spend my entire years.

I looked—my eyes started shedding tears of blood.

If I could look at my condition,

it was as if a doomsday for my heart.

Sometimes, she appeared as a frame on the wall.

Sometimes, I saw her in wondrous motion.

Sometimes, she put her feet out of the frame in grand style.

Sometimes, she showed me her attractive countenance.

Sometimes, she covered her face with her tresses.

Sometimes, she placed her hands around my neck,

and then abruptly making it look like a hostile act.

For some nights at a stretch, this was the state of affairs.

Our association lasted for quite a while in this act of make-belief.

At last, healers were called in to look at my condition.

If a distasteful herb was prescribed, I had to sip it down the throat.

I was afraid of myself; I was in a state of senselessness.

A troubled heart; and a state of total despondency.

I was locked into a small cell to diminish the fire of my madness.

People were afraid to come close to me,

thinking I could harm them.

Things slowly showed some improvement,

and the condition that prevailed gradually subsided.

The deception of that image and the madness.

She showed some signs of estrangement.

She didn’t give me the same old look of affection.

Poor thing, she started hitting her head against the wall.

Sometimes offering comfort, sometimes troubled.

Sometimes she was out of control in my pursuit.

Sometimes she showed her heart to me.

Sometimes she taunted me about my lack of constancy.

Sometimes she said farewell, goodbye.

Sorrow had sapped all my strength.

I never saw her again.

I never saw her in her glory again.

But sometimes a shadow in the moon;

sometimes a flicker of imagination in the world of dreams.

In a state of sleeplessness, I spent my youth losing you.

That moon-faced beauty didn't show her face in a dream.

I didn't see her in a dream ever again.

I lost my sense of awareness and self-consciousness.

I suffered due to my bad luck

but slowly, I regained my energy

because I had to live in the world for some more time.

Mir never saw that magnificent beauty again.

Was that a real thing, or the glow of my imagination, a dream?

Mir’s poetry is filled with a celebration of love, its joy and trance, pain and enchantment. Here are some couplets that reflect the deep distress of his heart, including the creation of dreamlike images.

sub-h voh aafat uth baitha tha tum ne n dekha sad afsos

kya kya fitne sar jore palkon ke saaye saaye gaye

That calamity woke up early morning and

if you didn’t notice, it was your bad luck.

What havoc must have passed under the shadow

of her eyelashes!

ji chahata hai a’ish karein ek raat ham

tu hove chaandni ho gulaabi sharaab ho

One night, I want to have a time of my life.

Your glorious presence, moonlight and rosy wine!

mausam-e abr ho subu bhi ho

gul ho gulshan ho aur tu bhi ho

A cloudy sky and a decanter of wine.

A rose garden, and just you!

qurbaan pyaala-e mai-e naab

jis se k tera hijaab nikla

Glory be to the cup of vintage wine

that helped in lifting your veil!

sabr kahaan jo tum ko kahiye lag ke gale se so jao

bolo n bolo baitho n baitho khare khare tuk ho jao

No patience to tell you, come and sleep in my embrace.

No need to say anything, no need to take any trouble,

just be still in the moment!

jab milne ka savaal karuun huun zulf o rukh dikhlaate ho

barson mujhko yuun hi guzre sub-h o shaam bataate ho

When I ask you about meeting,

you show me your locks and looks.

I have spent years waiting.

You keep saying, this morning, that evening.

lete hi naam us ka sote se chaonk uthe

hai khair Mir sahib kuchh tum ne kwaab dekha

Someone uttered her name and suddenly you woke up.

Are you all