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you fighting for this?”

I could name a few reasons, but none of them are totally true. They’re mostly cop-outs.

I knew it last night in a moment of clarity.

My retreat from the situation wasn’t because my feelings were hurt or that she didn’t trust me. It wasn’t even that she was taking Rosie and moving out.

It was that for the first time in my life, I wanted something that mattered. I needed it. I needed them.

It wasn’t losing a contract or missing a concert or having a girl I was seeing move away. None of that matters. It was replaceable. I could find a substitution.

There is no substitution for Jaxi and Rosie.

They’re it.

They are my people, the souls who make mine feel complete. With them, things make sense. They fall into line. The world is balanced.

So, what if I couldn’t have them? What if Jaxi said no? What if it didn’t work out and there was nothing I could do?

I kept thinking about Libby and Ted. How they seemed happy, and then it was all over. If I gave that much of myself to Jaxi and she walked away, I’d die. I couldn’t go on.

“Boone?” Mom asks softly.

“I’m scared too. What if she doesn’t want me?”

That line is usually followed up by a laugh or a punchline, but not this time. This time, I mean it.

It’s a sobering thought.

“What if I try my best and it doesn’t work? What if … what if she needs more than I can give her?”

Mom smiles softly. “She needs someone to love her and that little girl unconditionally. Are you implying that you can’t do that?”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“That’s all she really needs, honey. And no one can love them like you do.” She looks around the room, searching for words. “You took her in. You gave them a home. You didn’t send them to a hotel or take off to Vegas to let her figure it out. You knew, intuitively, that she was your person and this little girl was your family. You did what none of your brothers would’ve done.”

She lets that sink in before smiling at me again.

“I know we haven’t spent much time together yet, but in the times we have, I’ve watched her with you. I’ve watched her look at you when no one is looking. She looks at you like I’ve always hoped a woman would look at the son of mine she’s chosen. With adoration. With a little bit of awe, that I know they’ll grow out of.” She winks at me. “She chose you, Boone. She’s in love with you. You just have to have faith, sweetheart. And believe in yourself like I believe in you. Like she believes in you.”

My chest warms.

“Trust me, Boone. If she didn’t believe in you, she never would’ve let that little girl near you.”

Shit.

“What do I do then?” I ask.

A twinkle sparkles in Mom’s eye. There’s something exciting, something hopeful about it.

I get off the stool. The breakfast is forgotten.

“First things first. How committed are you to her?” Mom asks.

“How committed am I or how committed do I want to be?”

“Want to be.”

I think about my answer before I say it.

It takes two seconds.

“I’m all-in, Mom.”

A bubble of excitement bursts in my stomach.

Who am I kidding? I want Jaxi. I love her. And I want Rosie too.

My family is right. It’s time for me to get my shit straight.

“Will you help me, Mom? I need to make this good.”

She smiles. “Go shower and brush your teeth. Get dressed. And for the love of God, do not put Oliver’s pink shirt back on. I have a plan.”

Twenty-Six

Jaxi

I hate this. I hate this. I hate this.

I take in the apartment complex in front of me. The eggshell blue paint with bright, clean white trim gives it a very fun and fresh vibe.

The landscape is meticulous. Large palm trees loom overhead and short, waxy-leaved bushes line the walkways. The trash receptacles are camouflaged to blend in with the surroundings. All in all, I can see Rosie and me living here.

If we have to.

“Are you ready, Rosie?” I ask, tugging on her hand.

She looks up at me. “Where are we?”

“We’re going to go inside. I need to talk to a man,” I tell her.

I don’t know when or how I’m going to tell her we’re moving here. It’s another change in her little life that’s already been pummeled with them.

It doesn’t seem fair.

But staying at Boone’s under the circumstances doesn’t seem fair either.

I can’t win. He must agree because he didn’t come home last night.

I thought he would. Down deep, I hoped he would. I almost broke down around four this morning and called him. But I know he knows his way home. If he was hurting as much as I was, he would’ve returned.

Believe what he’s showing you, Jaxi. You were right. Now keep going forward.

“Look! A bird!” Rosie says, pointing at a big black bird floating on a breeze.

“It’s pretty, huh?”

“Yeah.”

We get to the front door and walk inside. The lobby has a cathedral ceiling with an oversized fireplace on the back wall. It looks like it was a model home at some point.

I’m in love.

“Can I help you?” A woman with white-blond hair and a name tag that says Susan greets me with a smile.

“Yes. Hi. I’m Jaxi Thorpe, and I’m here to see Danny.”

Her smile grows wider. “If you will grab a seat, he’ll be right with you.”

She motions toward a few brown leather couches near the fireplace. I lead Rosie to them and get her settled next to me with my Kindle.

Despite the sadness in my heart, being in this environment sends a shock of excitement through me. I love watching the people come in and out. I imagine the job that Susan might do and how she might help various residents meet their needs.

“Someday,” I whisper to myself.

“Huh?” Rosie asks.

I ruffle her hair. “Nothing. I was talking to myself.”

“Oh.” She looks around. “Where is Boone?”

“I …

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