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smile was tentative but confident.

The hairs went up on my arms and legs as I read what she'd written a second time. Every single word of it resonated in me. It was as if she’d somehow watched a movie of my entire life and summarized it here.

I spent another hour reading more posts written by adults who had birthmarks and it was as if I’d stepped through the wardrobe into Narnia. I’d never known there were so many other people like me. They were spread across the world, and the fact that they existed at all was a revelation. I’d always felt so alone. Unique, like Michaela had said, but not in a good way. But here were other outcasts who had all lived through their own versions of my life. It was like finding I had long lost brothers and sisters. This was the first time I felt like I belonged to a group.

Then I realized, I didn’t really belong. Not yet anyway.

Filled with apprehension but determined, I got out my phone and turned the camera on, put it in selfie mode and snapped a picture, making sure my whole birthmark was showing. Then, heart pounding, I uploaded it to the Facebook group and typed a reply to Michaela’s post:

Hi, I’m Indi. Your post really inspired me. This is the first picture of me without makeup that has been taken in eight years. I hope you like it.

Then, before I lost my nerve, I hit return.

34

Hudson

On Sunday, I was surprised to get a call from Dr. Neufeld.

“I talked with Bart Keller and he’s extremely concerned. We both are. This isn’t an emergency by any means, but I’ve already contacted a good friend of mine, Lisa Bourdon. She’s a well-respected ENT who’s been practicing medicine for ten years. She’s agreed to fit you in first thing Monday morning if you can make it.”

Even though I was scared shitless, I said, “I’ll be there.”

Once again demonstrating what a good friend he was, AJ skipped his first class and came with me to the appointment and even though him being there helped, I purposely skipped breakfast so that if I threw up from the anxiety, it would only be dry heaves.

Thankfully, we didn’t have to wait long before a knock sounded on the door and Dr. Bourdon entered.

She had long strawberry-blonde hair and kind eyes. She introduced herself to us both and shook our hands.

Surprisingly, we didn’t discuss my symptoms at first. She asked me a few questions about my life and somehow got on the subject of pets. I told her about Deke and we spoke a few minutes about hamsters because her youngest child wanted a pet and she wasn’t sure she could handle the responsibility.

As I explained what was involved in taking care of Deke, I found myself relaxing. By the time we got around to discussing what was going on with my body, I wasn’t even nervous anymore. She examined my ears and gave me a hearing test and while AJ and I waited to hear the results, I prepared myself for the worst.

In a way, AJ took the news that I had otosclerosis harder than I had. The look on his face…it was as if the doctor had said I had six weeks to live, which was pretty ironic, considering he’d come along to be my rock. But he pulled it together as Dr. Bourdon explained exactly what might happen and what my options were for each scenario.

Best case scenario, things didn’t get worse, my hearing stayed the way it was and the hearing aids she wanted me to get corrected my problem. However, it was more likely that my hearing would worsen over time and there was no way to know how much or how fast because everyone is different.

“If it comes to it, there is a surgical option called a stapedectomy involving a tiny prosthetic that would allow the sound waves to bypass the abnormal bone and reach your inner ear. I’ve found it to be the most successful option should the hearing aids prove to be insufficient.”

Afterward, we went to breakfast at the Skinny Pancake because, despite the bad news, I was starving.

“I don’t understand how you’re not freaking out right now,” AJ said as we sat down with our food.

“I am freaking out. I have no idea what this means for my hockey career. At this point, I may not even have a hockey career.”

AJ shook his head. “Don’t say that. I’m sure that once you get those hearing aids, you’ll start playing like you used to. Hell, I’m thinking about how shitty I’d play if I couldn’t hear…” He coughed. “Dom’s not going to take it well, you know.”

“No, he’s not,” I agreed. “But after the way he treated Indi at Thanksgiving, I don’t really give a shit how he takes it.”

“Speaking of Indi…I haven’t seen her around the past couple days. Something go down with you two?” He popped a tater tot in this mouth, one eyebrow raised questioningly.

I put a small piece of parsley aside for Deke. “We’re actually not speaking.”

His fork stopped on the way to his mouth. “Shit. What did you do?”

“What makes you think I’m the one who did something?”

“Didn’t you?”

“Well, yes, but that’s not the point.”

“What did you do, genius?”

I told him all about how Indi was the one who suggested I had otosclerosis and that I’d reacted badly, but I couldn’t be very specific without telling him about her birthmark and based on how long it took for her to tell me about it, I knew she wouldn’t appreciate me telling AJ about it.

“Did you try the relationship reboot?”

I shook my head. “Not yet. I’ve tried calling and texting, but I think she blocked me. My phone keeps saying my messages haven’t been delivered.

“You’re going to have to go see her,” he said.

“Thanks, Mr. Obvious. I know that.”

“And if you don’t think the relationship reboot is enough, maybe your dad can tell you

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