Someone Who Isn't Me, Danuta Kot [good books to read for adults TXT] 📗

She popped it open and gulped it down, then belched. For a moment it looked as though she was going to throw up, but she managed to get herself back under control. Kay nodded at her and turned her obvious attention away from Poppy, while keeping the girl in her peripheral vision as she fished in her bag again and produced a packet of cigarettes. ‘Here,’ she said. Poppy looked at her. It was like a flash of understanding between them. Kay’s gesture said I know you need something. And Poppy’s said, More than this, but she took a cigarette and lit it, drawing on it hard. Her hand shook. She looked at Leesha. ‘Did you…?’

‘I’m going,’ Leesha said abruptly. She looked directly at Poppy, who looked back at her, a kind of mute plea in her eyes. Leesha jerked her head and Poppy followed her out of the kitchen.

Kay stood up and moved quietly until she was in a position to see down the corridor. The two women were talking, their heads close together. Kay heard Poppy say, ‘… don’t like him…’ and Leesha’s response, ‘… doesn’t matter. If you want…’ Her masked gaze moved towards the kitchen. Kay stayed where she was. Let this Leesha woman see that Poppy had support.

She went back to her seat at the table when she heard the front door close behind Leesha, then there was the sound of Poppy’s feet running up the stairs. She listened as Poppy moved around on the floor above her, then there was silence. After waiting about fifteen minutes, Kay was ready to go upstairs and check, but then she heard movement and Poppy came back down and into the kitchen. There was more colour in her face, but her eyes were unnaturally bright. She’d clearly taken something, but not enough to knock her out. While she was upstairs, she’d changed into a tiny skirt and top, pulled her hair back from her face and fixed it with a clip. It looked pretty – casual but stylish. ‘I like the way you’ve done your hair,’ Kay said, stifling all the other things she wanted to say.

Poppy mulled this over, accepting another cigarette from Kay. ‘Yeah. I got to go out.’

Kay ran her hand through the shapeless mess her own hair had become. Since a fire that had just about destroyed her cottage near Whitby, she hadn’t been bothering with a hairdresser. She’d cut it herself, keeping it cropped brutally short. No wonder that Leesha woman had made fun of her. ‘I don’t know what to do with mine,’ she admitted. ‘What do you think?’

Poppy looked surprised, but pleased to be asked. She squinted at Kay over the smoke from her cigarette. ‘It needs some product on it. And colour. You could, you know, get it shaped a bit. Feather it round your face. It’d hide the… make it look, you know, softer.’

‘You think I should keep it short?’ she asked, deferring to Poppy’s expertise.

‘Yeah. Suits you, or it would if it wasn’t a mess.’

Fair enough. It was a mess. She smiled at Poppy. ‘Thanks. Are you still doing hair? Would you do mine for me next time you come to Tania’s?’

She thought she saw a flicker of interest on Poppy’s face before it smoothed back into cool indifference. ‘If you like.’ Poppy shrugged. ‘Only I’m, you know, too busy to come in. For a bit.’

Push it, or step back? Kay had just seen Poppy being intimidated. She couldn’t ignore it. Poppy had to know Kay was on her side. ‘Who’s Leesha?’ she asked.

‘Just a mate.’ Poppy looked down, rejecting Kay’s invitation to talk.

‘You need to come to Tania’s House,’ Kay said gently but firmly. ‘You’ve been missing your appointments with Graham.’ Graham was Poppy’s probation officer.

‘Yeah, well, he’s useless.’

Kay rather agreed with that, but this wasn’t going to help Poppy. ‘But you need to see him. And if you need some more help, we can find that for you.’

‘I’m fine,’ Poppy said.

‘Are you? Listen, Poppy, whatever you say to me, when we’re having a support session, is confidential. Whatever you tell me, whatever it is, I can help.’

Poppy’s eyes filled with tears suddenly, and she turned away so Kay wouldn’t see. ‘There’s nothing to tell.’ Her voice was muffled.

‘I can’t make you tell me anything,’ Kay said carefully. ‘And I wouldn’t try. Sometimes, if you’ve got a problem, even talking around it can help. I know you’re back on stuff. Is Leesha selling it to you?’

Poppy’s laugh was jerked out of her. ‘You think you know everything, don’t you?’

‘No,’ Kay said slowly. ‘I obviously don’t. Come in and talk to me, or let me call you if you’d prefer that. You need help, Poppy. That’s what I’m here for.’

Poppy didn’t deny it. Her head drooped and she wouldn’t meet Kay’s gaze. ‘It’s too late for that. I want you to go,’ she said.

It was important now to show Poppy she had control. ‘Of course. But you’ll come in to Tania’s, won’t you?’

Poppy looked at her. ‘Just to do your hair?’

‘Just to do my hair.’

‘OK…’

Kay left, having obtained Poppy’s agreement to come to Tania’s House the following Monday. But in the meantime, Kay needed to check her schedule, try and clear a bit of time to give Poppy some additional support. This was more than just a return to drugs – people had relapses, and it wasn’t good, but they could find their way back again. Poppy’s It’s too late made Kay think that there was more to this than drugs.

And there was the problem of this woman, Leesha. Was she Poppy’s dealer? Dealers had a strong influence over their clients – the clients relied on the dealer for their fixes – but it was a commercial relationship, the dealers relying on the users for their market and their money. What Kay had just seen looked like more than a drugs deal. This Leesha woman was putting pressure on Poppy to do something,