Embracing Today, a firefighter romance: (The Trading Yesterday Series, #3), Kahlen Aymes [essential reading txt] 📗

My arms were still around her, but one hand came up to cup her face. “Look at me,” I commanded. She did as I asked, and I used my thumb to wipe at the tears on one of her cheeks. “Make me understand, then. Are you still in love with Carter?”

The sunlight, just rising in the east, cast golden light across one side of her face and her light grey eyes sparkled with the remnant of tears. Marin shook her head. “No. I’m not in love with him. I feel guilty that he died.” The words wrenched from her almost as if she didn’t want to tell me. “I shouldn’t have gone to the shop that night.”

“Oh, Marin. You have to let that go. It wasn’t your fault.” I shook my head, a tenderness I’d never felt toward another woman sweeping through me.

“I’m trying.”

I sucked in a relieved breath. “You have to, sweetheart.” I bent to kiss her mouth, but she turned her head.

“What if I’m cursed?” she asked brokenly.

I sighed heavily. “I know you’ve lost a lot of people you cared about, but we can go slowly Marin. Please don’t push me away. Who knows about tomorrow, but we have today. Please don’t waste this time.”

“I just love you so much. I don’t think I could bare it if I lost you, too.”

I almost didn’t hear the last part of her words because my heart was flying. It was amazing how quickly emotions could turn on a dime. “Then don’t lose me. Pushing me away is losing me, too, right?”

“I’d rather be without you than for you to die.” It seemed like the admission was ripped from her.

I bent down, tightened my arms around her torso and lifted her off the ground until our faces were on the same level and her legs were dangling. “Well, I’d rather die than be without you,” I said, with a smirk beginning to walk with her toward the house. “We are at an impasse, honey.”

“I’m serious, Ben,” Marin insisted.

“So am I. Stop being silly. You don’t think I’d let a little thing like dying keep us apart, do ya?”

I walked up the wooden steps of the porch. “Ben—” she began.

“Keep practicing that name, babe. When my family leaves, I’m gonna love the shit out of you. Night after night I’ll show you how alive I am.”

I still held her close and realized the thoughts my words brought to mind. Just the thought of making love to her made my dick flood with blood. I set her down until her feet touched the floor of the porch and slid my hands down until they grasped her hips. I pulled her hard against me. “Feel that? That’s all for you.”

I bent my head to kiss her, my mouth taking hers in a hungry kiss. Her hands slid up my arms and wound around my shoulders. I had to lift her again so that I could kiss her as deeply as I wanted to.

“Good morning, you two,” my sister called through the screen door.

Instantly, Marin pulled her mouth away in a startled flash, but I still held her close to me. I didn’t care if Missy saw us kissing. I had to convince the woman in my arms that I wasn’t going anywhere.

“Shit,” I muttered, but smiled as I looked down at Marin. My erection would be tenting my flannel pajama pants the minute I pulled away. “Morning, Missy.” Marin’s forehead dropped to my shoulder as a small laugh burst forth.

“Um, I have a problem. This is not something my sister needs to see,” I whispered in her ear.

Marin’s head snapped up and she smiled as our eyes locked. “Okay. Go back to check on the kids and I’ll get breakfast going.”

“French toast?” I asked, hinting.

“Sure.”

“Bacon and eggs?”

“Okay,” she nodded.

“Hashbrowns?”

Marin’s eyebrow shot up. “Pretty hungry, huh?”

“Starving.” I backed up toward the steps and placed another hard kiss on Marin’s mouth, then set her on her feet. “Love you,” I whispered against her mouth. She hesitated. “Say it,” I squeezed her to me. “You know you do.”

“I love you, too.”

I grinned, released her and hopped down the two steps in one stride. I pulled my T-shirt down and held it over the bulge in my pants.

Happily, I turned and jogged away from the house. I decided to check on Dark until my body was under control. “Come on, Gem!” I called to the puppy. “Come with daddy!”

Marin’s tinkling laugh followed me. “It’s gonna be a beautiful day!” I said to myself.

MARIN

How could my heart be soaring and heavy at the same time?

I loved Ben so much. I wanted to be with him so badly, but I was still scared there was something hanging over me that caused me to lose people I loved. I tried to push the apprehension down as I started breakfast. I smiled to myself remembering his cheeky grin as he hurried off to get Remi and Dylan up for chores. I told myself to trust him and steeled myself to trust the future. One day at a time, and today would be a wonder.

“Need any help?” Missy asked as I started the coffee.

“I’m good with this,” I said, setting two frying pans on the stove and turning on the heat before I went to the refrigerator and pulled out the eggs and milk.

“You seem happy, this morning,” Missy observed. “Ben has that effect on people. We really miss him.”

I cracked some eggs into a bowl and used a whisk to break up the yolks and mix it with some milk. “He’s great with the kids.”

“Dylan adores him. Are you sure I can’t do something? I’m not used to sitting around. Can I set the table?” Missy asked.

“Sure.” I pointed to one of the cupboards as I added a splash of vanilla and a tablespoon of sugar to mixture for the French toast. “The plates are up there, and the silverware is in this drawer over here.”

It wasn’t long and