The Life of Trust, George Müller [e ink epub reader .txt] 📗

“I have received a little money from ——. Have you any present need for the Institution under your care? I know you do not ask, except indeed of Him whose work you are doing; but to answer when asked seems another thing, and a right thing. I have a reason for desiring to know the present state of your means towards the objects you are laboring to serve, viz. should you not have need, other departments of the Lord’s work, or other people of the Lord, may have need. Kindly then inform me, and to what amount, i. e. what amount you at this present time need, or can profitably lay out.”

At the time when this letter came we were indeed in need. Nevertheless, I considered that, as I have hitherto acted (i. e. telling the Lord alone about our need), I ought to continue to do, as otherwise the principal object of the work, to be a help to the saints generally, by seeking to lead them to increased dependence upon God alone, through this Institution, would be frustrated. I answered therefore the letter in substance as follows:—

“Whilst I thank you for your love, and whilst I agree with you, that, in general, there is a difference between asking for money and answering when asked, nevertheless in our case I feel not at liberty to speak about the state of our funds, as the primary object of the work in my hands is to lead those who are weak in faith to see that there is reality in dealing with God alone.”

After having sent off the answer, I was again and again led to pray to the Lord in this way: “Lord, thou knowest that for thy sake I did not tell this brother about our need. Now, Lord, show afresh that there is reality in speaking to thee only about our need, and speak therefore to this brother, so that he may help us.”

To-day, in answer to this my request, this brother sent one hundred pounds. Thus I have means for establishing the infant school, and for ordering more Bibles. Also the orphans are again supplied for a week; for when the money came in, there was not one penny in hand for them.

April 7. This evening I received information from my little half brother that my dear father died on March 30. During no period did I pray more frequently or more earnestly for the conversion of my dear aged parent than during the last year of his life; but, at all events, it did not please the Lord to let me see the answer to my prayers.

April 9. We are on the point of sending some money to the East Indies for missionary objects. Whilst I was on my knees respecting this object, five pounds was brought for it.

May 2. Nothing having come in for five days, we were to-day again penniless. In answer to prayer five shillings sixpence came in, and some trinkets were sent, the names of which the donor does not wish to be known. Thus we were helped through this day. Observe here how the Lord allowed five days to pass away without influencing the hearts of any to send us supplies; but the moment there is real need, the stream runs again.

May 3. Last evening a brother was baptized, who on the first Lord’s day of this year came with his intended wife to Bethesda Chapel. Both were in an unconverted state. Only since April 1, forty-one persons have come to us to speak about their souls.

May 8. There are four believers staying at my house, and to-day we had only a few shillings of our own money left. I gave myself, therefore, to prayer for means for our own personal expenses. In answer to my request, I received this morning five pounds.

May 10. To-day five of the orphans were baptized. There are now fourteen of them in fellowship.

May 26. Nothing had come in. My engagements kept me from going to the Orphan Houses till seven in the evening, when the laborers met together for prayer. When we met I found that one of them had given seventeen shillings, which had been divided between the three houses. This, with the little which had been left yesterday, had procured all necessary articles. We are now very poor.

May 27. We met for prayer at eleven this morning. No money had come in, but there was enough for dinner in all the houses. This morning the last coals were used in the Infant Orphan House, and in the Boys’ Orphan House there were only enough for to-day, and there was no money in hand to buy more. In this our need T. P. C. sent a load of coals. We purpose to meet again at four this afternoon. May the Lord graciously be pleased to send help in the mean time!

Evening. The Lord has had mercy! A person bought some days since several articles, which had been given to be sold for the benefit of the orphans, and owed six pounds fifteen shillings. This morning I asked the Lord to incline his heart to bring the money, or a part of it, as we were in such need. Just as I was going to meet for prayer with my fellow-laborers this afternoon, he came and brought four pounds. But our kind Father showed us still further to-day that only for the trial of our faith he had for a season withheld supplies; for there was given this evening, with Eccles. ix. 10, five pounds. There came in also nine shillings for articles which had been put into the hand of a sister, who has taken on her the service of disposing of articles which are given for sale. Thus the day, which had begun with prayer, ended in praise. But there is one thing more to be recorded respecting this day, as precious or more so than what has been said: I was to-day informed that the Lord has begun to stir up several of the boys to care about their souls.

June 17. For several days past I had been very poor in reference to my own temporal necessities, as well as in reference to the orphans. To-day we were especially poor, in both respects; but our kind Father remembered not merely the need of the dear orphans, but gave me also some money for my own personal expenses. The same sister just referred to, who brought five pounds ten shillings sixpence for the orphans, brought me also seven pounds for myself.

June 22. To-morrow, the Lord willing, I purpose, with my wife, to accompany the three German brethren and the five German sisters to Liverpool, who purpose to sail from thence. Under these circumstances it is desirable to leave at least a little money behind. This desire of my heart the Lord has granted; for this morning D. C. gave me five pounds, and there came in by sale of articles ten shillings fivepence. In the evening a sister, who has left Bristol to-day, sent me by her mother five pounds.