Human Imperfection, Teboho Kibe [read a book .txt] 📗

them as utter failures in life, since their mileage in life hadn’t reached its optimum when they were severely scrutinized. What if they change somewhere in their mid-life crisis? What if they use the remaining half or even three quarters of their lives as responsible citizens? Even though here we are not trying to condone their current acts of disobedience, but it is of utmost benefit for us to evaluate their delinquency in the light of possible future change. I believe that no one is naturally chronic to disorder or lawlessness. If you return to the grave after a sufficient number of days as an unchanged malefactor, then I’d believe that you willingly chose to do so, not because it was a natural gift for you to remorselessly err and taint yourself.

 

Our young persons are like earthworms. Some may dislike them and try to employ mental or psychological pesticide against them. Mature adults may regard youths as the very ones who are destroying or ‘eating’ away the moral fibre and stability of society, or causing decay in it. Yes it’s true that earthworms and the like are known to be hazardous to crops, but what about their championship or advantage in creating porosity in the soil? So are earthworms and the like necessary in nature or do they only serve the purpose of causing deterioration or maligning some of nature’s produce? The ball is in your court? You come up with the necessary ‘agricultural’ engineering necessary to balance the two. So, as you can see, youths in general, can’t be exterminated, but they can be somehow treated, if we know what value we can derive from them.

 

Clouds can make the beauty of the sun not to be seen, but at the same time they can be a source of rain. Remember, it’s not the tooth that bites, but it is the pressure exerted by the jaws that make teeth to bite. So, as to young persons, we do not abhor them as individuals, but we loath their despicable actions. The sharp teeth or canines of a lion can be rendered harmless provided they are not put to use. Likewise the eminent or apparent inclination to be practisers of sin in young persons can be minimised or dissolved through the shunning or idleness of their first world. To stimulate positivity and good results from them, we need to see beyond the clouds. We need to see beyond the current decay. We need to see beyond the ‘transitory’ rapacity and roguery.

 

Now I’d like to venture into a more intense sphere of human imperfection and its various manifestations. It’s the sphere if human imperfection in marriage. Well, well, well. Here we go. Alas! I like it when everybody says no marriage is ever perfect and no wife or husband is ever perfect. So this automatically makes the two to therefore enter an imperfect marriage. But it’s often paradoxical when either begins to seek perfection in it thereafter. So, it seems among us that there is this deep seated craving for perfection. Well, such desire in itself is not wrong but can only be amended terminologically. We can here say that it is proper for married couples to seek a frequent and increased use of the second world in marriage, i.e. the acts of true love, care, deep respect, good communication, co-operation and trust. These are some of the most desired and endearing qualities that are needed by many. In turn there happens to be a sense of identity, true worth, self respect, emboldened dignity and a deep seated feeling of contentment and accomplishment in both the receiver and the giver.

 

Sadly however, most marriages today seem to be an ooze, deep mire, and an emotional privy. People are quick to get in and swift to exit. Nonetheless, as in the case of juvenile delinquency or uncontrollable youth, not all hope can be lost in this sphere. It doesn’t have to be a vicious cycle of all generations of mankind, regardless of whether you were wittingly married or not. So, what’s the proper approach to such ‘sinking ships?’ Should we blame the captain? Should we blame the cargo? Should we blame an assistant to the captain? Not really! Such an approach will simply be like adding salt to the wound. Well, well, well. My friend, as a good companion, surely you know some hints. Yes you do! So both of us should agree that it starts with ‘me.’ Yes, it starts with me. Why should I want somebody else to pass me the ball when I’m not in a position to amicably receive it? I must first position myself well before I demand or expect that favour or act of kindness to be directed or delivered to me.

 

But, it’s very tricky though! Take for instance. Say you buy your wife a bouquet of flowers. To your surprise, she refuses the parcel and throws it on your face. Were you wrong? Legitimately you were right. You displayed an act of benevolence, the good fruit of your first world. But, was she wrong in refusing the gift? Yes, no, what? Not exactly. She might have reasoned that you were trying to make up for something from which maybe she might need an explanation or apology of it. Did she fail to see the value of your heartfelt gift due to the fact that she didn’t position herself well to befit the gift, or was it you the giver who failed to execute the good gift at a most ideal time and under ideal or proper circumstances? The surprising answer to these questions might be a big “NO.” So, even in such circumstances you as the giver can rest assured that you did your best while at the same time you may have to ponder in a mild spirit the real elements that led to your unwelcomed favour.

 

Now let’s consider a second similar scenario. What if you as a wife decide to take time and cook a sumptuous meal for your laborious husband only to find out that he’s just not prepared or in a mood to join you for dinner, him lacking appetite. Would you rant and rave? Would you say: “You don’t appreciate my hard work!” Would you begin to be suspicious of him as if it were his chronic habit, never at all giving heed or attending to any of your household endeavours? An impulsive, misconception based and rash deducing would be faulty and probably unwholesome. It’s neither wise to undermine your efforts as if what you did was simply an act of adding a log to a fire. No, it’s also not a matter of you planning and executing at a wrong time. You simply did your best as a good wife. You put the fruits of your second world to good use. However, you may also want to consider and in a calm tempter carefully examine the situations that led to such unbecoming response. Was he simply tired? Is it some metabolic problems etc, just to give a small hint

 

So here we see that misunderstandings or simple misconceptions can get at the helm of your imperfections or short sightedness and try to unduly vomit you out of marriage life. Yes it’s true that certain private or deeper emotional needs also have to be unselfishly catered for, as in conjugal union etc, but it is usually the seemingly ‘minor’ things that spur up the needless fire and the drawing up of unfounded or hazy conclusions to one’s own detriment and assassination. Other than such aspects or elements of inherited human imperfection, marriage and a family life are the best natural pitch on which to free or ‘ostentatiously’ display the acts and fruitage of the second world, i.e. that of charity, selflessness, adoration and unity. So, both of you need to turn the table around, so to speak, and allow your sacred matrimony to be ruled or dominated by the use of the second world, that of irrefutable enchantment.

 

So, in all instances we see the real victor, the most desired common denominator of all creeds and affairs of humankind, the ever famous, beauteous and pulchritudinous world of goodness, i.e. the second world. Whether directly or indirectly alluding to it, all of us always inadvertently fall to it or touch it, in our speech, desires, and aspirations and so on. It is our most anticipated paradise. This world should be glued to us, inseparable and be our rule or ruler in all our earthly affairs. But, apart from stimulating such an endearing manifestation in behaviour, we still need to up our level of ego, our belief that such unwavering goodness can be achieved. Cause the biggest failure lies in failure to act because of needless impediments. So let’s try yet to take another journey through the thicket of execution or the necessary ego and power to bring forth.

 

Have you noticed waiters and waitresses at a restaurant. Their arms come packed with plates of food. They don’t doubt their dexterity. They act promptly, precisely with no wreckage or breaking of anything after all! Why? Their mental acumen, adroitness and precision have been thoroughly whetted as if they could also have wings and believe they could fly. After all, through consistent use, such dexterity that is devoid of staggering makes them masters of proper and excellent execution at all times. Those are the fruits of mental ego, confidence and will, that you can have the power to delegate or render good deeds, and provided you first assure yourself that you can. This is what I call the muscle of the second world. It needs that mental steroid, then the biceps and strength procured will be visible in ‘motion’ as acts rendered or performed. This is the second world been spurred, not to latent energy, but to a current. So never undermine your ability to be worthwhile, it is needed by someone else out there just like how that food by the waiter or waitress is awaited by someone at the table. Much appreciation and thanks will come back to you, just like how the food deliverer gets congratulatory tips. Let your first world be latent and diffuse your appetite of all its contents.

 

My dear friends, let’s try to quickly touch another avenue human imperfection. This time it would be more in the form of human anatomy or our physical flesh and its components. Well friends, our body cells are said to have the capacity or capability of renewing themselves to an endless future. But what baffles, puzzles or makes doctors and scientists a bit cumbersome is when our cells fail to renew themselves accordingly which is something that invites old age and thus the eminent death of the body. In other words, according to biological law our body cells ought to renew themselves indefinitely thereby leaving us as humans not knowing old age or aging and death at all! So biologically speaking we could be always young, agile, dynamic, vigorous and absolutely defect-free in our immune system. But hey, imperfection is here, and it has got us sadly going berserk or dumbfounded.

 

In nature, or naturally, it is true that viruses have always been there. But man ought not to be harmed by these, if it were not of our imperfect condition in flesh. Viruses could be there, but they ought not to make us sick. If it were not of our fallen flesh, our bodies would be resilient, resistant or protective enough so as not be catapulted of defeated by any invading virus or disease. So, in a perfect flesh and body, there can’t be any biological misbehaviour or sickness, so to speak. But to prove that imperfection or that a malfunction is there, we are born with various defects, as is weak bloodedness, mental de-arrangement and various other disabilities. Yes, some of these disabilities may be deliberately prompted by some misuse of certain things from the conceiver or mother-to-be while some can be alluded to merely as