Benign Flame: Saga of Love, BS Murthy [rainbow fish read aloud txt] 📗

doubt that at all. She isn’t going to be the one to lose her head to some silly seducer. After all, won’t she keep vanity at bay? Surely, she would.’

Before she could put her doubts at rest, she remembered Roopa’s tryst with Ravi at Tara’s place that brought her fears about her mate’s fate to the fore.

‘Maybe that confirms his apprehension about her situation,’ she became doubtful. ‘As she lost her head like it happened with me in the city bus, can she keep her cool when someone comes wooing her the next time? What if he is proved right?’

Convinced about her man’s reading of her mate’s situation, she sought to analyze the latter’s mind-set,

‘It’s clear that Sathyam’s love is of no avail to her for it lacks the vigour to dispel the euphoric clouds from her lovesick eyes. Won’t his wit fail to cater to her innate intellect and his demeanour her romantic vision? And that makes her vulnerable to the misty looks of the fast guys for sure. Why, hasn’t she taken to my man though she tried to hide her feelings from me? Haven’t I sensed her romantic overtures to Raja, in spite of my own excitement? Surely, he wouldn’t have lost sight of her apparent infatuation for him. How couldn’t he have when he was the object of her adoration? Maybe, that was at the back of his mind when he voiced his fears about her possible fall.’

‘Would Roopa then become a target practice for assorted seducers?’ she thought in worry. ‘Is she willy-nilly sauntering on the volcano of temptation to be swept away by the lava of illicit passion?’

As she shuddered to think further, she tried to push that thought away, only to get bogged down all the same.

‘But, how can I remain indifferent to her predicament given our own intimacy?’ she thought, overcome with empathy for her friend. ‘Could I ever let my treasure slip into the garbage of vice? Shouldn’t I go to lengths to see that she wouldn’t fall into alien hands? Won’t her indulgence with assorted characters sour our own amour? Having tasted the sweetness of her ardour, how could I forego the ecstasy of our intimacy? Can I let things foul-up at her end, no way.’

‘Maybe, I could’ve averted all this had I been genuine when she wanted my opinion about Sathyam,’ she thought, going to the roots of her friend’s distress. ‘What a shame that I was evasive in my reply, though I myself wasn’t impressed with him. How cruel that I placed the proverbial last straw on her emotionally unstable back then, though unwittingly. If only I had been frank with her then, her scales of doubt wouldn’t have got tilted the wrong way. Didn’t I insensibly impose this marital burden on her, forever? But the poor thing never blamed me for that, and instead bore it all resignedly! What’s more, when I got the man of men as my man, she rejoices at my fortune without a tinge of jealously? But myself being on the cloud nine how mean of me to let the poor thing pine for love. Didn’t Raja sum it up it all so well, when he said that she would suffer even more for the nobility of her soul? Oh, God, how can I alleviate her suffering?’

Overwhelmed by pity for her mate, she pictured her future,

‘If we move over to Hyderabad, I can be near her, but how that would help her? Finding me joyous, won’t she suffer even more for her deprivation in comparison, unintended though? Caught between the kick of my life and the burden of her own, won’t she be worse off then? But if we stay put in Delhi, she would have to fend for herself when she needs me the most. What a classic catch-22 to contend with!’

In the eventuality of their moving over to Hyderabad, as the prospect of Roopa falling in love with Raja Rao dawned on her, she tried to envision its affect on their lives.

‘Instead of bringing succor to her, won’t we compound her misery?’ surmised Sandhya. ‘If Raja too falls for her, barring a eunuch, which man can remain indifferent to her charms? Romantic that he is, he is bound to rave about her. Isn’t his concern for her already a pointer to that? But as they both love me they may keep their infatuation under the wraps? Won’t that make them suffer for my sake, becoming morose in turn? That would surely sour my own mood even as she is caught in a cleft of love and loyalty, leave lone fidelity.’

‘Then, what’s the way out?’ she raked her brains. ‘Were I to leave her to her fate, and God forbid, she goes astray, would I ever be able to forgive myself? My guilt-filled conscience would ensure that I’m haunted all my life, won’t it? Besides, I’m bound to feel miserable seeing her in the dumps. Simply put, I can never ever let her down, whatever it might take. So, we must move near her to let life take its own course thereafter.’

‘Which course could it take then?’ she turned inquisitive to gaze at the crystal ball. ‘All said and done, Roopa may not cross the threshold of her romantic leanings, and might remain within the bounds of marital fidelity. In that case, our coming together will restore to us what we’ve been missing in our separation. Even if Raja gets attracted to her, unable to cross the hurdle of her fidelity, he would confine himself in his platonic plane.’

However, wondering whether sentimentality alone formulates man-woman chemistry, she tried to grasp the applied physics of adultery,

‘Should Roopa itch for an adulterous hitch, given his personality, as well as his proximity, Raja could easily outsmart her every other suitor. So be it, if that’s the way it turns out to be. Though I might have liked to keep my man all for myself, by the way, which woman doesn’t want it that way; dispensation seems to be the only means of my atonement, isn’t it? If I share my man with her, that would bring cheer into her life unburdening my guilt as well. Even otherwise, isn’t it a logical progression for our lesbianism? More so, it would ensure that her amours are kept in-house, isn’t it? Is it that the ménage a trois we were jesting about all along seems to be on hand?  If so, what amours we three could bring into our orgies. As for Raja, it amounts to having his better half with her other half, as much for his satiation as for my salvation.’

Having fantasized about their threesome sex, she turned her focus on Sathyam’s fate.  

‘Wouldn’t it be unfair to him?’ she thought as her sympathy for him affected her. ‘But, how could it be helped? Maybe, it doesn’t help man taking a lively wife if he’s not up to the mark. What a fine soul he otherwise is! What a pity love doesn’t reckon one’s goodness in its yearning. Well, if Sathyam were destined to be cuckolded, wouldn’t it be in order that Roopa is cajoled in Raja’s arms. Queer though, it ensures that she remains in the family fold.’

As she couldn’t help but envision the scale of their love triangle, she thought, ‘Once we shift there, they wouldn’t be able to hide their craving from me for long. It could be a great fun intercepting their signals and decoding their innuendos. I could even scare them occasionally by dropping hints that I am at spying. Won’t that pep up their sense of adventure before I bind them in our amorous fold? Isn’t it maddening imagining the sexual union with the man and the woman I love!’

The thrill she felt in fantasizing their threesome in that fresh light, further fuelled her love for her man and her mate, fusing them all into one erotic whole in her consciousness.

“Don’t get upset dear, your love will save the day for her,” he said, as she looked at him after that long reverie.

“I count on your support,” she said.

“It’s a given from me,” he said taking her hand.

“Can I take it on her behalf?” she smiled mirthfully.

“If you can keep it with you,” he said smilingly.

“Along with what she has for you,” she said opening the food packets.

“What is that?” he said.

“Wait for that,” she said smilingly.

Sometime after they had their meals, coyly looking at the window, she said,

‘Pull down the shutter.’

“If you excuse me,” he said, kissing her forehead.

“If you please I’ll make you moody,” she said amorously. 

“Your mere thought is enough for that, but somehow,” he said patting her head.

“I understand, good night,” she said kissing his hand.  

‘Clearly he’s disturbed, so he’s in love with my lovey,’ she thought endearingly.

Envisioning a love-filled future for three of them, soon Sandhya slumbered on the lower berth in that coupe for two.

 

Chapter 21

Enduring Longing

 

That morning as the Minar reached Dadar, Raja Rao and Sandhya were all set to alight, and exiting from the railway station, with a couple of porters, who carried their luggage, they hired a cab to Chembur. And in time, Sandhya stepped into a spacious flat to the warmth of her in-laws’ greetings.

“Any complaints about my son?” said Gopala Rao in jest, taking himself away from The Times of India.

As Sandhya smiled coyly, enquired Visala,

“How’re your parents?”

“I brought their pranaams to all of you,” said Sandhya.

“How’re the Thimmaiahs?” enquired Gopala Rao.

“They’re evergreen as ever,” said Raja Rao.

“How’s our house by the way?” asked Visala.

“Sandhya may tell you,” said Raja Rao.

“Was it all funny Sandhya?” Visala smiled.

“Oh, no, it’s vintage” said Sandhya reminiscently.

“How’s Roopa?” asked Visala.

“She’s fine,” said Sandhya.

“We all took to her a lot, more so Hyma,” said Visala.

“She too holds you all very highly,” said Sandhya, and felt, ‘it’s good that his family has taken to her, and that helps, just in case.’

“How’s Hyma and my B-I-L?” enquired Raja Rao.

      “They’re all so eager to spend some time with Sandhya,” said Visala.

After having a good time at her father-in-law’s house, towards the evening, Sandhya accompanied Raja Rao to his sister’s place at Andheri.

“We should’ve received you at the railway station but my brother was not for it,” said Hyma apologetically to Sandhya.

“Obviously Raja wanted to go the extra mile alone with his bride,” said Ranga Rao making Sandhya blush to the roots.

“You look exquisite,” said Hyma hugging Sandhya.

“It’s all your affection,” said Sandhya clasping Hyma.

“How’s Roopa?” asked Hyma still holding Sandhya.

“She is fine and is all praise for you,” said Sandhya withdrawing herself.

“She’s quite impressive,” said Ranga Rao.

“Had she had her way, she would’ve been well on her way to join your profession,” said Sandhya reminiscently.

“So the medical fraternity is deprived of a charming lady doctor,” said Ranga Rao mimicking sadness.

“This is MCP syndrome, the inability to value women other than for their beauty,” said Hyma in mock anger.

“Raja, sorry I couldn’t make it to your marriage but am glad that you got a nice wife,” said Perindevi, Ranga Rao’s mother, after taking a close look at Sandhya.

“You look fifty at your seventy,” Raja Rao greeted her while Sandhya bowed at the old woman’s feet.

“Thank my grand children for that,” said the old woman affectionately as Prem and Preeti, aged five and three, flocked to her.

“Don’t you remember me?” asked Sandhya, inviting them into her arms.

“You’re our beautiful Sandhya auntie,” said Preeti while Prem remained shy.

“Raja, I’ve heard that your father-in-law performed your wedding in grandeur; by the way, how much dowry did your wife fetch?” said Perindevi.

“It’s a case of Archimedes Principle applied to matrimony, the more a groom is taken to the bride all the more he loses on the dowry. So my father-in-law weighed me light on that count,” said Raja Rao in jest.

After a mirthful time, followed by dinner, as they stepped out of the house, said Raja Rao to Sandhya,

“It’s great fun with relatives if wife is around.”

“More so, if her father is made fun of,” she said trying to be