PENALTY, Annika Sturm [best books to read for self improvement .TXT] 📗

closed his eyes, 'when they cut his jacket open to get to the wound, I could see how big and deep it was,' he gasped for air, 'there was blood everywhere,' he looked at Felix, 'those thugs, I'm going to kill them I swear.' He was breathing hard with anger. Felix looked at him intently. 'Was it definitely a homophobic attack do you think?' He asked him. Alex nodded. 'Oh yeah,' he gulped, 'they beat us up because of that, there is no doubt about it.' Felix comfortingly stroked his shoulder.

Suddenly Kai came running into the room. 'Alex, for fuck's sake,' he stared at him, 'what the hell happened? How is he?' Alex was trembling looking at Kai. 'I..., I don't know.' He stammered. 'What do you mean you don't know?', Kai shouted at him, 'were you not there with him? You didn't leave him did you?' Alex stared at him in disbelief. 'Kai!' Felix gave him a warning look. 'No,' Alex spat through his teeth, 'I didn't leave him.' 'How could this happen? How can Tommy be stabbed in the street, right in the middle of Dortmund?', Kai was racing up and down the room, running his hand through his hair in despair, 'if he doesn't survive this,' he was on the verge of crying, 'if he dies here tonight, I swear Alex,' he gasped for air, 'I'm holding you responsible for this.' He concluded quietly. 'Shut up Kai,' Felix shouted, 'how dare you blame Alex for this? Have you lost your mind?' 'Why did you not protect him?' Kai screamed at Alex in anger.

Alex took a deep breath as the tears started rolling down his cheeks again. 'Funny you say that. I have been asking myself the same question,' he said calmly after a pause, 'I told him to run away, I threw myself on top of him when they beat the shit out of him,' Alex grabbed and clutched Felix's hand, 'the knife was meant for me but he tried to help me,' he shouted, 'there was nothing I could do, he ran straight into it.' Kai stared and listened in tears of agony. 'You have brought nothing but pain and misery into his life.' Kai spat through his teeth. 'Kai,' Felix shouted again, 'what are you talking about!' Kai moved closer to Alex’s bed. 'I wish you two had never met.' He said and stared at him with angry tearful eyes. Alex looked Kai straight in the eye. 'You're right,' he whispered, 'I have caused him nothing but pain,' he gulped, 'and believe me, I would give anything if it could be me fighting for my life instead of him right now.'

The door opened and one of the doctors walked into the room. The boys stared at him expectantly. He was a tall man in his mid fifities with grey hair and glasses. 'Good evening together. My name is Doctor Schwarz and I have just spent the last two hours with Mr Stiller.' He looked at Alex with warm gentle eyes. 'Please,' Alex said exhaustedly in almost a whisper, 'please can you tell us how he is. Is he okay?' The doctor stood in front of Alex’s bed and smiled. 'It seems your partner had a guardian angel.' Alex gasped at the choice of his words and the message itself. 'Does that mean he will be okay?' He asked looking for reassurance. 'You did a good job slowing down the bleeding in the first instance Mr Hanisch. Mr Stiller has lost a life threatening amount of blood but it would have been a lot worse without you I'm sure,' Alex looked at him intently and Felix squeezed his hand. The doctor turned to all three boys, 'he's still unconscious but his condition is stabilising. He's receiving transfusions to make up for the loss of blood,' the boys stared at him, 'but thankfully no internal organs have been damaged. He should be over the worst now.'

Alex gasped for air and clutched Felix's hand. 'Oh thank God,' he exclaimed with relief and took deep breaths, 'thank you, thank you so much.' He smiled at the doctor in tears. 'Jesus Christ!' Kai shouted, just as relieved, and let himself fall into a chair. 'Can Alex see him?' Felix asked quietly. Doctor Schwarz hesitated. 'Usually this is against the rules as you are not his next of kin Mr Hanisch,' Alex stared at him in disbelief. But the doctor smiled again, 'we'll make an exception for you, however. I think you have been through enough as it is. Just keep it quiet perhaps,' Alex sighed with relief. He nodded and smiled, 'but do make sure you only see him for a few minutes. He needs to rest now.' Doctor Schwarz said gently as Alex wiped the tears off his cheeks. 'Yes, sure I understand.' 'And how are you feeling?' He asked him. 'Oh, I'm fine. I'm fine now. Thank you.' Alex said and was already trying to get up.

'How long until he'll be able to play again sir?' Kai asked. The doctor looked at him and hesitated. 'I can't tell you for sure Mr Roth. The wound is deep and it can take up to four months for him to fully recover I would have thought,' the boys stared at him, 'but it can take less time too. It all depends on how well his body responds. And on the level of care he'll receive.' 'Oh God,' Kai muttered, 'he'll miss the World Cup.' 'No, he won't,' Alex sounded defiant, 'I'll look after him. I'll get him the best care in the world.' Doctor Schwarz smiled at him. 'The police have arrived and want to ask you some questions Mr Hanisch,' he said, 'I thought you'd want to see your partner first though, so I told them to give you a bit of time,' Alex took a deep breath and nodded gratefully, 'I hope they find those thugs,' the doctor continued quietly, 'those sorts of people make you despair in the human race,' Alex was taken aback by the kind words, 'I wish you both a very happy future together.' Doctor Schwarz patted Alex’s shoulder. 'Thank you.' Alex whispered and looked at Felix, who smiled at him gently. The doctor told the boys where they could find Tom and left the room.

'Come on then,' Felix gave Alex a hand helping him get out of bed. He assisted him put his T-shirt and jumper back on and Alex slowly and carefully stood up. Every move hurt and Felix tried to give him as much support as possible while Kai was still sitting in the chair, vacantly staring ahead in shock, 'hey big guy,' Felix said as he turned towards him, 'can you help Alex get to Tommy's room? I will need to call his brother and tell him what happened.' Kai slowly stood up. He carefully put Alex’s arm across his shoulders to give him support. 'Marco will kill me,' Alex said quietly as he was leaning onto Kai, 'he'll never forgive me for this.' 'Alex, this wasn't your fault,' Felix took a deep breath, 'you go and see Tommy, I'll sort this out.' Alex smiled at him gratefully. 'Come on, let's get you to Tommy's room.' Kai mumbled.

'I'm sorry,' Kai said quietly as the boys were slowly walking down the corridor together, 'I'm sorry about what I said earlier.' Alex gulped and looked at him. 'You were frightened and worried about him. I understand. Let's just forget about it.' Kai didn't respond. As they got closer to Tom's room, Alex’s heart started racing. 'I'll leave you to it now.' Kai said when they reached the room and quickly turned around to find Felix. Alex was breathing hard looking after him. Then he pushed down the handle and slowly opened the door.

Alex's heart sank when he saw his friend asleep in the hospital bed in this white sterile room. Tom had tubes entering his arms and the cuts and bruises on his face and on his upper body were striking. Thankfully his breathing seemed steady though and the heart rate monitor made reassuring noises.

He slowly walked towards him and the memories and sheer horror returned again. He took deep breaths and pulled a chair to his bedside. At first he didn't know what to do other than stare at his friend with tears in his eyes. He desperately wanted to touch him and talk to him. Then he gently took his hand and held it firmly. He stroked and kissed it. His heart broke seeing him hurt like this when only a few hours ago he was playing the game of his life. 'Tommy,' he whispered, 'can you hear me?', he carefully brushed over his injured forehead, 'you're safe now,' he said, 'everything's going to be alright. I promise you,' he started crying with anger again, 'God, what have they done to you,' he spat through his teeth, 'I swear I'll kill them for hurting you like this,' he clutched his hand and kissed it again, 'I'm so sorry Tommy. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you.' Alex kept looking at his friend and thought of all the happy memories he had of him. And he realised once again just how much he meant to him. He remembered how he had studied his perfect body only that morning. How proud and lucky he had felt to be with him. 'Tommy,' he said again in tears, 'can you hear me?' He rested his head on Tom's arm holding his hand tightly.

Then suddenly Alex could feel Tom move his hand. It was subtle, hardly noticeable, but it was enough to make him look up again. 'Tommy?', Alex said and gently stroked his forehead. And very slowly Tom opened his eyes. Alex stared at his friend before he clutched his hand again and smiled with tears in his eyes, 'hey,' he said tenderly stroking his cheeks carefully, 'you're safe now,' Tom tried to speak but he was too weak. He winced as he made an attempt to move and Alex was trying to keep him calm, 'shh, hey, you need to take it easy now,' Alex couldn't stop the tears running down his cheeks. He kissed his hand but Tom had closed his eyes again, 'can you hear me Tommy?', he quietly asked him. Tom didn't open his eyes but very gently squeezed Alex’s hand. Alex kissed it again and again, 'you can hear me,' he said beaming, 'you'll be fine,' he whispered, 'I'll look after you.'

Doctor Schwarz entered the room with another nurse. They slowly walked towards Tom's bed and the doctor put one hand on Alex’s shoulder. 'I need to ask you to leave him for a bit now. Only for a little while. He needs to rest.' Alex was still clutching Tom's hand. 'He can hear me,' he mumbled more to himself. Then he turned to Doctor Schwarz and smiled, 'he opened his eyes briefly and squeezed my hand.' The doctor nodded and gently patted Alex’s back. 'You can see him again in the morning. Come on now Mr Hanisch.' Alex felt uncomfortable. He looked at the doctor with worried eyes. 'Can I not stay here? I don't want to leave him. Please.' Doctor Schwarz smiled. 'I know. I understand. But the more rest he'll get the faster he'll recover and...'

'Alex?' Tom's voice sounded faint and weak. He had opened his eyes again and looked at his friend. 'Tommy, I'm here,' Alex stroked his forehead and looked into his eyes, 'hey,' he beamed at him and Tom managed to give his friend a tiny smile in return. He made an attempt to speak again but visibly struggled, 'shh, you need to rest Tommy,' as Alex was holding Tom's hand, he could feel him trying to move it. Alex gently kissed it again and pressed it against his cheek. Tom slowly moved his fingers and tenderly touched the cuts and bruises