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room, laying me down on the bed before going to get his stuff in the hallway and coming back in laying next to me before falling asleep.


I woke up with arms wrapped around me, my head on a stronge chest and my legs wrapped up with Kyle's... Oh god this felt amazing, but it shouldn't feel this way... I mean this is Kyle!

I tried to get off of him with out waking him up but I could tell there was no way I could get off him without waking him up.

"Crap." I muttered to myself as I laid my head on his chest again, waiting for him to wake up.

I sat there for about an hour maybe two before Kyle started to move. He groaned and smaked his lips together, sighed and then his whole body froze...

"Umm... Morning, darling." He said but still didn't move.

"Hey... You wonna talk?"

"We're going to have too. It's either now or later."

"Alright, go ahead and say what you need to say."

"Well, I can't believe you actually left and with a note... I know you're hurting right now and everything but I always thought that I was someone you could run to when you were scared and I thought I was your shoulder to cry on... And when you really needed me you didn't come to me, you sat there quite and staring at nothing for the whole day and then you ran out the window, hiding from whats really going on... I wanted to be there for you and you just pushed me away."

He sighed and took a deep breathe, I looked up at him and saw he had tears in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry, Kyle... I didn't know what to do and I didn't want you to be bothered with my problems and I was just... confused on everything thats been happening all in one night. It's hard and I'm sorry for not going to you when I needed someone. I love you in so many ways and I still couldn't go to you for things."

I cried and cried some more... I hate how everythings happened...


I cried for a few hours with Kyle and we talked things out but he knew that I wasn't going back home for a while, but he understood and was going to stay with me for a little while. We went out and ate at a local diner. I didn't realize that I was so hungery until I got a look at the food and my stomach made the loudest noise I have ever hard! And to make it worse... It happened when everything seemed to go quite in the diner.

A lot of people in boothes nearby either laughed or turned around and stared at me like I was a freak of nature! What! It's not like their stomach doesn't do it every once in a while.

"What? I'm hungry! Stop staring, didn't your parents ever teach you not to stare?! Go back to your own buissness!" I said as Kyle started to laugh at me. "Shut up, Kyle!"

"Sorry, Doll. It was funny though, you've got to admite it!"

"Whatever. I'm hungry, lets eat something okay?" I begged before turning my attention onto the menu.


chapter two


*~*KYLE*~*


I couldn't stop staring at her over my menu. When she was crying with me it killed me to know that she needed to cry and everything but I still wish I could have gotten her to stop and mke her laugh and be the fun care free best friend that I know and love.

The girl that I was looking at now was close to the old Sydney that I knew but if you looked closely you could see that she was still sad and hurt from what happened to her. I wanted her to be fun and care free again but I knew that would take time and she just wasn't ready for that yet.

"So, what are you thinking of having?" I asked as she looked over her menu.

"Umm... I was thinking bacon and eggs? I mean, I've never been here before and it's not something you can really mess up on, you know?" she giggled as I softly shook my head with a smile.

"Alright. We'll get bacon and eggs with orange juice?" I asked and she nodded. "Okay. So you want to talk about it?" I asked softly. She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. "Honey, it's not you're fault that this happened. You know that it would have happened no matter what. You would have found out sooner or later but it's a good thing you know this now, because if you hadn't found out then you would have started to love him and care for him and it would have hurt you more in the end. It's a bad thing that it happened I know that but it's a good think that you know now."

"I know that but it still sucks. I know you're trying to help and I really appreciate it but it hurts to know that he actually did that to me! And it makes it even worse because I did the same thing to him! It souldn't matter I guess because I did it to but it does and that just seems to make things even worse. I even knew that I wouldn't be able to love him, I knew that we were only going to last for a little bit because I could never trust im and he could never trust me. And you can't have a relationship when you can't trust the person you're with. So we already had that problem and with me being so close to you he wasn't comfortable and he always made a big deal out of it.

"He always wanted to know who I was with and where i'm going and why and sometimes he just didn't need to know and I hated that he couldn't trust me but I guess he had a right to since the one night I didn't tell him where I was going or why I ended up sleeping with his best friend! I like te worse girlfriend ever and... To make it worse then ever, I knew..."

She looked down at her hands before looking back up at me, "I knew that I couldn't love him because I already love someone..."

chapter three


*~*SYDNEY*~*



I looked up at Kyle and he eyes were on me wait ing for me to talk and explain.
"I knew that I couldn't love him because I loved someone else..."

"You... You do?! Who? When? H-How?!" Kyle gasped, staring at me like he was seeing me for the first time. Maybe this wasn't a good idea, to tell him aboout this... Maybe I should just wait and see how things go... No, he had a right to know whats going on and how I feel!

"I... I love... you. I have for a long time, I just didn't know how to tell you or how you would react or if you just wanted to stay friends. I was kind of scared that you wouldn't love me back and that I would be all by myself. But I just thought that you had a right to know how I feel about you..."

"If you loved me then why...did you date Taylor?"

"I thought that maybe it was just like some chrush and that it would pass and since we've been friends for so long I just thought that maybe if I dated someone else that my feeling would... disapear I guess. But I was wrong because it just made it even worse and I was always thinking 'oh he's going to come up behind me and we're going to hold hands and talk and then fall asleep next to each other' but that never happened because I kept thinking that he would do that but it's something that you and I would do... not him."

"Did you even want to be with me though?" he asked, and I could see the hurt in his eyes. "Because it really seems like you didn't want to be with me and thats why you were trying to push your feelings away."

"I wanted to be with I just didn't want everything screwed up in our friendship if you didn't feel the same way. I was scared that if I told you then it would mess up our whatever this is between us! And I would rather be friends then nothing at all. I want you to be in my life."

"You should have just told me before you dated that jerk off. It would have never happened and you would have been with me at your house watching movies. Because you know what? I do love you too. Just as much as you love me, and I have since seventh grade, I was just to shy to ask out the prettiest girl that I knew." He smiled at me softly as I sat there gasping.

"You love me?"

"Yeah, sweetheart I do love you a whole lot."

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Publication Date: 05-07-2011

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