The Call Of The Canyon, Zane Grey [good non fiction books to read txt] 📗
- Author: Zane Grey
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Became Possessed As By A Thousand Devils. She Became Merely A Female Robbed
Of Her Mate. Reason Was Not In Her, Nor Charity, Nor Justice. All That Was
Abnormal In Human Nature Seemed Coalesced In Her, Dominant, Passionate,
Savage, Terrible. She Hated With An Incredible And Insane Ferocity. In The
Seclusion Of Her Tent, Crouched On Her Bed, Silent, Locked, Motionless, She
Yet Was The Embodiment Of All Terrible Strife And Storm In Nature. Her
Heart Was A Maelstrom And Would Have Whirled And Sucked Down To Hell All
The Beings That Were Men. Her Soul Was A Bottomless Gulf, Filled With The
Gales And The Fires Of Jealousy, Superhuman To Destroy.
That Fury Consumed All Her Remaining Strength, And From The Relapse She
Sank To Sleep.
Morning Brought The Inevitable Reaction. However Long Her Other Struggles,
This Monumental And Final One Would Be Brief. She Realized That, Yet Was
Unable To Understand How It Could Be Possible, Unless Shock Or Death Or
Mental Aberration Ended The Fight. An Eternity Of Emotion Lay Back Between
This Awakening Of Intelligence And The Hour Of Her Fall Into The Clutches
Of Primitive Passion.
That Morning She Faced Herself In The Mirror And Asked, "Now--What Do I Owe
You?" It Was Not Her Voice That Answered. It Was Beyond Her. But It Said:
"Go On! You Are Cut Adrift. You Are Alone. You Owe None But Yourself! . . .
Go On! Not Backward--Not To The Depths--But Up--Upward!"
She Shuddered At Such A Decree. How Impossible For Her! All Animal, All
Woman, All Emotion, How Could She Live On The Cold, Pure Heights? Yet She
Owed Something Intangible And Inscrutable To Herself. Was It The Thing That
Woman Lacked Physically, Yet Contained Hidden In Her Soul? An Element Of
Eternal Spirit To Rise! Because Of Heartbreak And Ruin And Irreparable Loss
Chapter 12 Pg 194Must She Fall? Was Loss Of Love And Husband And Children Only A Test? The
Present Hour Would Be Swallowed In The Sum Of Life's Trials. She Could Not
Go Back. She Would Not Go Down. There Was Wrenched From Her Tried And Sore
Heart An Unalterable And Unquenchable Decision--To Make Her Own Soul Prove
The Evolution Of Woman. Vessel Of Blood And Flesh She Might Be, Doomed By
Nature To The Reproduction Of Her Kind, But She Had In Her The Supreme
Spirit And Power To Carry On The Progress Of The Ages--The Climb Of Woman
Out Of The Darkness.
Carley Went Out To The Workmen. The House Should Be Completed And She Would
Live In It. Always There Was The Stretching And Illimitable Desert To Look
At, And The Grand Heave Upward Of The Mountains. Hoyle Was Full Of Zest For
The Practical Details Of The Building. He Saw Nothing Of The Havoc Wrought
In Her. Nor Did The Other Workmen Glance More Than Casually At Her. In This
Carley Lost Something Of A Shirking Fear That Her Loss And Grief Were
Patent To All Eyes.
That Afternoon She Mounted The Most Spirited Of The Mustangs She Had
Purchased From The Indians. To Govern Him And Stick On Him Required All Her
Energy. And She Rode Him Hard And Far, Out Across The Desert, Across Mile
After Mile Of Cedar Forest, Clear To The Foothills. She Rested There,
Absorbed In Gazing Desertward, And Upon Turning Back Again, She Ran Him
Over The Level Stretches. Wind And Branch Threshed Her Seemingly To
Ribbons. Violence Seemed Good For Her. A Fall Had No Fear For Her Now. She
Reached Camp At Dusk, Hot As Fire, Breathless And Strengthless. But She Had
Earned Something. Such Action Required Constant Use Of Muscle And Mind. If
Need Be She Could Drive Both To The Very Furthermost Limit. She Could Ride
And Ride--Until The Future, Like The Immensity Of The Desert There, Might
Swallow Her. She Changed Her Clothes And Rested A While. The Call To Supper
Found Her Hungry. In This Fact She Discovered Mockery Of Her Grief. Love
Was Not The Food Of Life. Exhausted Nature's Need Of Rest And Sleep Was No
Respecter Of A Woman's Emotion.
Next Day Carley Rode Northward, Wildly And Fearlessly, As If This Conscious
Chapter 12 Pg 195Activity Was The Initiative Of An Endless Number Of Rides That Were To Save
Her. As Before The Foothills Called Her, And She Went On Until She Came To
A Very High One.
Carley Dismounted From Her Panting Horse, Answering The Familiar Impulse To
Attain Heights By Her Own Effort.
"Am I Only A Weakling?" She Asked Herself. "Only A Creature Mined By The
Fever Of The Soul! . . . Thrown From One Emotion To Another? Never The
Same. Yearning, Suffering, Sacrificing, Hoping, And Changing--Forever The
Same! What Is It That Drives Me? A Great City With All Its Attractions Has
Failed To Help Me Realize My Life. So Have Friends Failed. So Has The
World. What Can Solitude And Grandeur Do? . . . All This Obsession Of
Mine--All This Strange Feeling For Simple Elemental Earthly Things Likewise
Will Fail Me. Yet I Am Driven. They Would Call Me A Mad Woman."
It Took Carley A Full Hour Of Slow Body-Bending Labor To Climb To The
Summit Of That Hill. High, Steep, And Rugged, It Resisted Ascension. But At
Last She Surmounted It And Sat Alone On The Heights, With Naked Eyes, And
An Unconscious Prayer On Her Lips.
What Was It That Had Happened? Could There Be Here A Different Answer From
That Which Always Mocked Her?
She Had Been A Girl, Not Accountable For Loss Of Mother, For Choice Of Home
And Education. She Had Belonged To A Class. She Had Grown To Womanhood In
It. She Had Loved, And In Loving Had Escaped The Evil Of Her Day, If Not
Its Taint. She Had Lived Only For Herself. Conscience Had Awakened--But,
Alas! Too Late. She Had Overthrown The Sordid, Self-Seeking Habit Of Life;
She Had Awakened To Real Womanhood; She Had Fought The Insidious Spell Of
Modernity And She Had Defeated It; She Had Learned The Thrill Of Taking
Root In New Soil, The Pain And Joy Of Labor, The Bliss Of Solitude, The
Promise Of Home And Love And Motherhood. But She Had Gathered All These
Marvelous Things To Her Soul Too Late For Happiness.
"Now It Is Answered," She Declared Aloud. "That Is What Has Happened? . . .
And All That Is Past. . . . Is There Anything Left? If So What?"
She Flung Her Query Out To The Winds Of The Desert. But The Desert Seemed
Chapter 12 Pg 196Too Gray, Too Vast, Too Remote, Too Aloof, Too Measureless. It Was Not
Concerned With Her Little Life. Then She Turned To The Mountain Kingdom.
It Seemed Overpoweringly Near At Hand. It Loomed Above Her To Pierce The
Fleecy Clouds. It Was Only A Stupendous Upheaval Of Earth-Crust, Grown Over
At The Base By Leagues And Leagues Of Pine Forest, Belted Along The Middle
By Vast Slanting Zigzag Slopes Of Aspen, Rent And Riven Toward The Heights
Into Canyon And Gorge, Bared Above To Cliffs And Corners Of Craggy Rock,
Whitened At The Sky-Piercing Peaks By Snow. Its Beauty And Sublimity Were
Lost Upon Carley Now; She Was Concerned With Its Travail, Its Age, Its
Endurance, Its Strength. And She Studied It With Magnified Sight.
What Incomprehensible Subterranean Force Had Swelled Those Immense Slopes
And Lifted The Huge Bulk Aloft To The Clouds? Cataclysm Of Nature--The
Expanding Or Shrinking Of The Earth--Vast Volcanic Action Under The Surface!
Whatever It Had Been, It Had Left Its Expression Of The Travail Of The
Universe. This Mountain Mass Had Been Hot Gas When Flung From The Parent
Sun, And Now It Was Solid Granite. What Had It Endured In The Making? What
Indeed Had Been Its Dimensions Before The Millions Of Years Of Its
Struggle?
Eruption, Earthquake, Avalanche, The Attrition Of Glacier, The Erosion Of
Water, The Cracking Of Frost, The Weathering Of Rain And Wind And Snow--
These It Had Eternally Fought And Resisted In Vain, Yet Still It Stood
Magnificent, Frowning, Battle-Scarred And Undefeated. Its Sky-Piercing
Peaks Were As Cries For Mercy To The Infinite. This Old Mountain Realized
Its Doom. It Had To Go, Perhaps To Make Room For A Newer And Better
Kingdom. But It Endured Because Of The Spirit Of Nature. The Great Notched
Circular Line Of Rock Below And Between The Peaks, In The Body Of The
Mountains, Showed Where In Ages Past The Heart Of Living Granite Had Blown
Out, To Let Loose On All The Near Surrounding Desert The Streams Of Black
Lava And The Hills Of Black Cinders. Despite Its Fringe Of Green It Was
Hoary With Age. Every Looming Gray-Faced Wall, Massive And Sublime, Seemed
A Monument Of Its Mastery Over Time. Every Deep-Cut Canyon, Showing The
Skeleton Ribs, The Caverns And Caves, Its Avalanche-Carved Slides, Its
Long, Fan-Shaped, Spreading Taluses, Carried Conviction To The Spectator
That It Was But A Frail Bit Of Rock, That Its Life Was Little And Brief,
That Upon It Had Been Laid The Merciless Curse Of Nature. Change! Change
Must Unknit The Very Knots Of The Center Of The Earth. So Its Strength Lay
In The Sublimity Of Its Defiance. It Meant To Endure To The Last Rolling
Chapter 12 Pg 197Grain Of Sand. It Was A Dead Mountain Of Rock, Without Spirit, Yet It
Taught A Grand Lesson To The Seeing Eye.
Life Was Only A Part, Perhaps An Infinitely Small Part Of Nature's Plan.
Death And Decay Were Just As Important To Her Inscrutable Design. The
Universe Had Not Been Created For Life, Ease, Pleasure, And Happiness Of A
Man Creature Developed From Lower Organisms. If Nature's Secret Was
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