On Creative Writing, Linda A. Lavid [read ebook pdf .txt] 📗

a reader is left wondering why, effect with no cause may be the problem.

Effect precedes cause. When an effect precedes cause, it can be jarring. The following sentences illustrate this problem: He shot three times after pulling out the gun or Larry crumpled to the floor when the bullet hit. The proper sequence calls for cause to precede effect. After pulling out the gun, he shot three times or When the bullet hit, Larry crumpled to the floor. When sentences are choppy or difficult to follow, effect preceding cause may be the problem.

Simultaneous cause and effect. Writers often use certain constructions - as, “ing” verbs - to relate simultaneous cause and effect. This becomes problematic when such sentences don’t make sense. An example: Ripping off the sheet, she collapsed onto the bed. This sentence implies that two events are happening at the same time which, when imagined, seems unlikely. A better stated sentence is She ripped off the sheet and collapsed onto the bed. It is always better to write clearly than take shortcuts by combining phrases that may or may not make sense. Simultaneous cause and effect is more easily expressed when one type of modality, such as thought, causes an effect in a different modality, such as action. For instance: With her silence playing on his mind, he slammed the cupboard door. Simultaneity problems arise when several characters in a scene are actively speaking, thinking, and doing.

The principle of cause and effect seems obvious, but it isn’t. When something doesn’t make sense in our work, it’s usually because the causal relationship has been compromised.

Now that we have taken a look at the hidden magic that goes into writing scenes, let’s turn our attention to the magic that is out in the open.

4

Fill the Garden ~ Development

Everything you can imagine is real.

— Pablo Picasso

At last, we’re in the trenches, armed and ready to meet the challenge of putting it all together. Here’s where we discuss the nuts and bolts of fiction - how to present the story.

Consider the following elements:

1) Action

2) Interior thought

3) Emotional content

4) Description

5) Dialogue

6) Exposition

Depending on genre and your particular sensibilities, you may be more heavy-handed in one element. For instance science fiction or romance may have more description. Literary fiction may have more internal thought. When I write a story, I mix these elements together. This is considered a commercial style. An example follows:

In the middle of slicing onions, the phone rang. Marnie took a few steps and glanced at the caller ID. Tina. Marnie shook her head and went back to the cutting board.

The answering machine clicked on. “I know you’re there. This is important. Really important.”

Marnie glared at the phone. She wasn’t going to bite. Everything with her sister was catastrophic from the time they were little, such a drama queen.

“It’s about that husband of yours. Pick up the damn phone.”

Now let’s define and discuss the elements.

Action: In the middle of slicing onions, the phone rang. Marnie took a few steps and glanced at the caller ID.

Action occurs when a character is doing something. It’s what you’d see if the scene were on stage or at the movies. Action is external. Snippets of action, like the one above, orient the reader by anchoring the character in a place, time, and situation. Longer stretches of action, called dramatic action, heighten the tension. Dramatic action is when something is happening and your POV character is in the middle of it. To dramatize action, add detail. If the action is only to orient the reader, keep it simple and direct. In other words, don’t get caught up in how Marnie is holding the onion.

Interior Thought: Tina.

Interior thought is what your POV character thinks. Thoughts can be expressed in incomplete sentences, questions, or long paragraphs. Interior thought is the one element that is unique to written fiction. Thoughts play a critical role in the cause and effect sequence. Besides being used in sequel, thoughts are utilized throughout the narrative in linking all the other elements. Effective thoughts precipitate change. In the example above, the thought Tina, causes Marnie to shake her head, a subtle reaction or change. Thoughts are punctuated in many ways, i.e., italicized OR done in plain text with a tag of “he thought” OR written in incomplete sentences OR paragraphed on their own. However you choose to punctuate be consistent and don’t mix the different formats. Thoughts are never placed within quotes of any kind.

Emotional Content: Marnie shook her head and went back to the cutting board.

As I stated earlier, a character’s feelings should be known at all times so that you can play them with wild abandon. This goes for all the characters in the scene. When illustrating emotional content think of an approaching train. Begin with a distant rumbling that then builds as the scene continues. Emotional content can be shown by what a character does, says, senses or thinks. In this example it’s tucked inside a character’s action. Later with the sentence, She glared at the phone, the emotional tenor is raised a notch.

Description: The machine clicked on.

Description is what is sensed (i.e., seen, smelled, touched, heard, tasted). Sensory detail brings vividness into the reader’s mind. And the more specific the detail, the better. Again, when writing description, consider the emotional state of your characters. What you ultimately choose to describe should mirror the emotional content thus establishing a mood. I began the above paragraph with, In the middle of slicing onions, the phone rang, but what if I’d started with, In the middle of licking an ice cream cone, the phone rang? Which description mirrors the mood of the scene better? Even the most seemingly inconsequential description makes a difference. Description of place is called setting. When writing about a place try to go there. What are the sounds, smells? How does the light change? When choosing detail, make it unique. A windy beach with white caps is good, but blowing sand that stings his cheek is better.

Dialogue: “I know you’re there. This is important. Really important.”

Written dialogue is different from spoken dialogue. Normal communication is mundane, roundabout. Story dialogue is clipped and gets to the heart of the matter. Dialogue is the main vehicle used for expressing conflict. Some basic Do’s:

- Do use contractions and sentence fragments.

- Do use punctuation instead of a tag. “Get out of here!”

- Do consider who’s talking, i.e., a child should not sound like a university professor.

- Do use tags other than said sparingly, e.g., he demanded, she cooed.

- Do follow cause and effect:

Not so good: “Where’s John? He owes me money.”

“To the store.”

Better: “John owes me money. Where’d he go?”

“To the store.”

- Do use an em-dash at the end of a line of dialogue to denote an interruption.

“It’s your father again. He yelled about the dinner. I told him to— “

“Mom, please. Let’s talk about something else.”

- Do use ellipsis to denote a trailing off.

“I stopped at Chin’s for some take-out. Frank was there. He looked …”

“Looked how?”

Exposition: Everything with her sister was catastrophic from the time they were little, such a drama queen.

In fiction, exposition is background information that addresses underlying reasons for current actions, feelings, and thoughts. It’s a form of telling that stops forward movement. In commercial fiction, it’s best presented in snippets. If an event in a character’s history is crucial to the story, consider starting the story from that particular event then move forward in time. Exposition can be paragraphed or woven into dialogue, description or interior thought. Exposition must have a purpose. If it’s filler information - where your character was born - leave it out.

Utilizing these elements will keep the narrative moving along. When you’re stuck, read your last written sentence then ask, in response what is the character doing (action), thinking (internal thought), feeling (emotional content), sensing (description), saying (dialogue)? And why (exposition)? When you think of writing this way, you will automatically do what writing books expound upon: showing, telling and following cause with effect.

There are two other concepts that will help make a scene interesting and seamless: Pacing and Transitions.

Pacing. Part of the magic with a good book is how the book is paced. Pacing, like many other aspects, occurs throughout the story in varying forms and levels. Alternating the main plot with a subplot can give an ebb and flow to the narrative. But there are other pacing tools. Scene speeds pace, sequel slows it down. Stretches of exposition, description, and interior thought decelerate the scene, but dialogue and dramatic summary revs it to breakneck speed. Short staccato sentences are fast. Long sentences are slow. Also, to prevent the rhythm from becoming stilted, rearrange the placement of the subject, verb and object, and sandwich short sentences between longer ones.

Transitions. Sequels provide a transition from one scene to another, but there are times when you simply need to move along the story continuum without having a sequel. You’ll often see a double drop space to denote a change of time or place, but seamless transitions can be applied by using Emotion, Weather, Dialogue, Name, Time.

Emotion: He was angry. So angry he’d blow her head off. By the time the police

came, he was still angry.

Weather: The hail pelted against the window. When the sun came out, he headed

for the barn.

Dialogue: He’d have to talk to her.

“What do you want?” she said through the crack in the door.

Name: Clearly, the missing link was Kara in Apartment 3C.

She was taller than he imagined. And not so young.

Time: Two days later the phone still hadn’t rung.

Wonderful! You now have all the building blocks to write fiction. Did I leave out anything? Hmm …

Oh, yeah, there’s the part that makes a writer dash up five flights of stairs, throw open the window and jump.

~ 5 ~

Dig the Weeds ~ Rewrite

I believe more in the scissors than I do in the pencil.

— Truman Capote

Visualize …

With the Dom P��rignon chilling and dinner guests about to arrive, I fan the manuscript pages. I’m amazed, shocked, awed by the lines and lines of beautifully typed words. Such a sense of achievement. I then turn to page one, the opening scene that I’ll read after supper, and mouth each word.

In the hallway, the clock strikes seven. Each gong is unnerving. Each gong, as I read, is alarming. Suddenly, the doorbell rings. My body jerks, electrified. Guests are arriving. But something is terribly amiss. The words, the sentences, they’re all wrong: typos, misspellings, adverbs, were’s and was’s. Such drivel! The bell is insistent, accusatory. There’s only one way out. I jump to the dining table, grab a fork, then dive to the nearest wall plug …

Alas, what was once written must be written again and again and again. It’s an inevitable and frustrating endeavor that also offers a tremendous opportunity for growth. With each problem faced, each sentence tweaked, each word replaced by another, your writing will improve and mistakes made hopefully won’t be made again. Learning how to evaluate and correct your work is a must for an independent writer. Yes, editing services can be purchased, but they do not come cheaply.

The review of your work should go from the general to the specific, namely: Diagnostic Read, Line by Line Editing, Copyediting.

Diagnostic Read. Once your manuscript is finished, have someone read it. But who? Perhaps someone in your writer’s group or someone who reads a lot. Someone who you can reasonably trust and who’ll be honest. Getting feedback can be frustrating since the evaluation of a manuscript is subjective. Also, this is not the time to