Smolder, Abigail Livinghouse [reading an ebook txt] 📗

sun peaking up, and as I looked at the watch I was glad to see I had only dozed off for about fifteen minutes. I rubbed my eyes and then kept my hand there for a few seconds longer. How stupid. How completely and utterly stupid. I had fallen asleep on watch, not only leaving myself a sitting duck but jeopardizing the group as a whole too.

 

 Trenton had trusted me enough to do this, and if he could see me now I had a feeling he wouldn't be too happy. Shaking the last of the sleep out of me I stood at the ready once again when Luke shouted.

 

 "Alright, it's time to switch shifts!"

 

 Already? It hadn't even been that long since I had began watch, and it was over after only a few minutes?

 

 Despite my confusion I made my way to the entrance where Luke and Manny were waiting before going inside and three new kids I didn't recognize exited to take our place. Trenton was waiting for us at the entrance, and he exchanged a quick hello with Luke and Manny before letting them pass. He waited until they were up the stairs before coming to walk by me.

 

 "So how was your first night on watch?" Trenton asked, seeming all too curious as we began to ascend the first flight.

 

 I narrowed my eyes at him but answered. "Fine."

 

 "Nothing too interesting happened? No Zoners?" He asked again, and I grimaced at the questions.

 

 "No." I couldn't exactly answer seriously considering I was asleep for part of my shift, so my voice came out a bit quieter than I had wanted.

 

 "So you were relaxed?" Trenton persisted further, and I stopped in my tracks at that question.

 

  He eyed me with that same innocent curiosity in his big blue eyes that he always seemed to have, and my eyes only narrowed further in suspicion.

 

  "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" I snapped irritated.

 

 Trenton blinked in mock surprise, his light eyebrows raising. "Excuse me?"

 

 "I was relaxed? What the hell was that supposed to mean Trenton?" I asked again, just as heatedly, and I felt my fire simmering in my fingertips. I clenched my fists so hard that my fingernails dug into my palms, but at least it kept the flames away.

 

 He shrugged, seeming indifferent to my frustration. "Nothing. I was just asking if you were comfortable as guard. I can see that you are far from it though." I scowled at his assumption in offense. Trenton paused, and as he assessed my tense posture his expression softened to one of concern.

 

 "Are you alright Siren?" He asked, reaching out to place his hand on my bare shoulder. I didn't jerk away this time, and at his soft touch a warm fluttery feeling swarmed about in my stomach that was completely unlike my fire, which buzzed in harmony along with the newfound warmth.

 

 My eyes widened in shock at him, and he cocked his head to the side curiously.

 

 "You're so warm." He murmured in near astonishment, and I just stared at him, into his deep blue eyes that held compassion and warmth and love for those around him. He loved this group, they were his family and they meant everything to him. But what was I? Just a girl he had pulled off the street.

 

  "I've never seen someone like you. You're so bright. Your hair", Trenton's hand traveled up my neck, my ear, until his fingers gently caressed a lock of my red hair. I stiffened, feeling his hand in my hair, the warmth from him causing the heat inside of me to burn, but in a wonderful and unknown way. I swallowed, feeling my cheeks burning too.

 

 "Your eyes . . ." His voice had dropped to barely a whisper as he locked gazes with me. His eyes were so blue, I didn't have anything to compare them to. There was nothing in this world anymore that was such a pure and honestly beautiful color, and so bright. I didn't know what he was talking about, he was the one with the brightness, not me.

 

  Trenton's gaze shifted down to my face, and I could feel him staring at my lips. Oh god, was he going to kiss me? I had never been kissed by a boy.

 

 I had never overanalyzed my sexual preference. I had just been with Terese and that was that, I hadn't wondered if I was gay or bi or any of those fancy terms. But now, feeling Trenton's heat that made mine pulse, and as I saw his tongue trail over his own upper lip, I could definitely say I was not completely gay.

 

 "Such a beautiful light in a world of dark." He whispered, leaning forward to close the distance between us.

 

 Just as I was about to shut my eyes, and allow his lips to touch mine, my fire flared abruptly to life, a warning, and my eyes flew open. I shoved Trenton backward, whirling around and searching the whole room for any sign that we were not alone. I had felt this before, when Half Deads or another group was near. All I saw was the broken waiting room of the second floor faintly lit by the sunrise, no one else was in sight.

 

  "Siren?" I spun back around, seeing Trenton's surprised and hurt expression at my sudden rejection. My face screwed up in guilt and well . . . regret. I had wanted him to kiss me but . . . something just wasn't right.

 

 "I-I have to go." I stammered, but stood exactly where I was. I wasn't sure where I was going to go, whether it be up the next flight of stairs or down the one we had just come up.

 

  "No, please don't go." Trenton stepped forward, his hands out and pleading. He shook his head. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. Don't leave. Don't let me drive you out of here."

 

 He looked truly upset. His blue eyes were shining and as he ran a hand through his hair, his embarrassed expression showed some of his anger at himself. Did I really want to leave because he had tried to kiss me? Or because my fire was still simmering oddly right below the surface? I pursed my lips, not really sure at all.

 

 "I don't know. It might just be time for me to leave. I don't usually stick around one place for long." And maybe your place just isn't the right one for me. Maybe none is . . .

 

 I didn't add that of course, my own unsure feelings about this wouldn't help Trenton's at all. The hurt didn't leave his expression with what I had said, but his eyes did widen slightly.

 

 Trenton seemed to fumble for something to say for a moment, torn between asking me to stay or probably telling me to do what I want. He was all for people having their own free wills, but also sticking to commitments it seemed. Finally, he sighed, his inner battle won apparently.

 

 "At least get some rest and change out of your clothes. Later you can have some breakfast and think about it more, okay?" Trenton asked, and by the look on his face I could tell he was expecting the worst but hoping for the best.

 

 At his mention of clothes I looked down and realized he was right, I was still wearing the same thing I always did. I had been given a fresh outfit the night I had come here, but didn't get a chance to change with the attack. I figured I might as well take him up on his offer, however my fire continued to burn with a silent warning. I would need to pay attention to this, most likely my instincts would save my life more than anything else.

 

 Looking at Trenton now I saw no immediate threat coming from the boy who had tried to kiss me, and I had almost let him . . . he seemed so innocent and sweet, but my flames claimed otherwise. Maybe there was something deeper than just compassion hiding beneath the depths of those big blue eyes.

 

                *             *             *

 

 Trenton led me to my own room, with a rickety but still intact hospital bed set up against the west wall. My new clothes were on the end of it along with a small black leather shoulder bag. I scowled at it and looked at him in confusion. He shrugged.

 

 "A gift from Billy I think. He fashions satchels and bags when he can and we usually sell them to anyone interested." He explained. I opened my mouth to protest but Trenton stopped me.

 

 "It's a thank you. We've never had someone save us before." He said softly.

 

 Anything that I was about to say disappeared as I felt my cheeks heat up. I hadn't ever had someone be this grateful for something I had done. What I had done wasn't even well thought out or something intended for praise. I wasn't sure what was going to happen, I was just glad I wasn't eaten and that no one else was either.

 

 "Well um, thanks." I said, and just stood there awkwardly until Trenton sighed, turned away and left.

 

 I wasn't sure if he was expecting me to say something about earlier or not, but obviously he hadn't gotten what he wanted.

 

 I took a deep breath and sat down at the edge of the bed, taking the bag and opening it up. Inside there was extra ammo for my gun, some food and water. Briefly I wondered if this was them telling me to leave, and a sting of hurt followed that assumption as I placed the bag back down. My rational side assured that Trenton had probably packed it in case of my leaving, and that it was also just another gift.

 

 A small part of me hoped that I was right, while another part wanted it to be wrong. If they were essentially kicking me out, that would be easier than having to leave. Did I want to leave? These were the first people who accepted me without question since the death of my family. Was that something I wanted to just throw away because I had almost been kissed by a boy I liked?

 

 If I was honest with myself, I wasn't mad because Trenton had tried to kiss me. I wasn't even really mad. I was just on guard because something had alerted me that there was a threat, and the only person around was Trenton. I had to point the blame somewhere and he was the only one that could possibly be the source.

 

 But why? Why now was Trenton suddenly being presented as someone that I should keep my eye on?  

 

It wasn't something I particularly wanted to think about, so with those thoughts shoved primarily to the back of my mind, I changed into one of the sets of clothes, a well fitted black shirt and black jeans. I had only gotten a few minutes of sleep in which I had that beyond strange dream. I could barely remember what happened in it. I couldn't remember the last time I had had a dream, but I was almost positive it meant nothing. Dreams were just that, dreams. I shut my eyes, hoping I wouldn't have another.

Chapter Nine: Blank