The Adventures of Gil Blas of Santillane, Alain René le Sage [most read books .txt] 📗
- Author: Alain René le Sage
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preferred legal measures to a reliance on our honour; but we
shall take the first opportunity of obtaining a replevy, and will
pay you without looking at your bill. To have my master on your
books is like so many ingots of gold. The landlord brought us the
wine, in spite of unmannerly creditors; and we drank to a speedy
replevy. It was as good as a comedy to see us drinking each
other’s health every minute, under our masters’ titles. Don
Antonio’s servant called Don Ferdinand’s plain Gamboa, and Don
Ferdinand’s servant called Don Antonio’s Centell�s: they dubbed
me Silva; and we kept pace in drunkenness, under these borrowed
names, with the noblemen to whom they properly belonged.
Though my wit was less conspicuous than that of the other guests,
they lost no opportunity of testifying their pleasure in my
acquaintance. Silva, said one of our merriest soakers, we shall
make something of you, my friend. I perceive that you have wit at
will, if you did but know how to draw upon it. The fear of
talking absurdly prevents you from throwing out at all; and yet
it is only by a bold push that a thousand people now-a-days set
themselves up for good companions. Do you wish to be bright? You
have only to give the reins to your loquacity, and to venture
indiscriminately on whatever comes uppermost: your blunders will
pass for the eccentricities of genius. Though you should utter an
hundred extravagances, let but a single good joke be packed up in
the bundle, the nonsense shall be all forgotten, the witticism
bandied about, and your talent be puffed into high repute. This
is the happy method our masters have devised, and it ought to be
adopted by all new candidates. Besides that I had but too strong
a wish to pass for a clever fellow, the trick they taught me
appeared so easy in the performance, that it ought not to be
buried in obscurity. I tried it at once, and the fumes of the
wine contributed to my success; that is to say, I talked at
random, and had the good luck to strike out of much absurdity
some flashes of merriment, very acceptable to my audience. This
first essay inspired me with confidence. I redoubled my
sprightliness, to sparkle in repartee; and chance gave a
successful issue to my endeavours.
Well done! said my fellow-servant who had addressed me in the
street, do not you begin to shake off your rustic manners? You
have not been two hours in our company, and you are quite another
creature: your improvement will be visible every day. This it is
to wait on people of quality. It causes an elevation, which the
mind can never attain under a plebeian roof. Doubtless, answered
I — and for that reason I shall henceforth dedicate my little
talents to the nobility. That is bravely said, roared out Don
Ferdinand’s servant, half seas over, commoners are not entitled
to possess such a fund of superior genius as exists in us. Come,
gentlemen, let us make a vow never to colleague with any such
beggarly fellows; let us swear to that by Styx. We laughed
heartily at Gaspard’s conceit: the proposal was received with
applause: and we took this mock oath with our glasses in our
hands.
Thus sat we at table till our masters were pleased to get up from
it. This was at midnight; an outrageous instance of sobriety, in
the opinion of my colleagues. To be sure, these noble lords left
the tavern so early only to visit a celebrated wanton, lodging in
the purlieus of the court, and keeping open house night and day
for the votaries of pleasure. She was a woman from five and
thirty to forty, still in the height of her charms, entertaining
in her discourse, and so perfect a mistress in the art of
pleasure, that she sold the waste and refuse of her beauty at a
higher price than the first sample of the unadulterated article.
She had always two or three other pieces of damaged goods in the
house, who contributed not a little to the great concourse of
nobility resorting thither. The afternoon was spent in play; then
supper, and the night passed in drinking and making merry. Our
masters staid till morning, and so did we, without thinking the
time long; for, while they were toying with the mistresses, we
attacked the maids. At length, we all parted when daylight peeped
in on our festivities, and went to bed each of us at our separate
homes.
My master getting up at his usual time, about noon, dressed
himself. He went out. I followed him, and we paid a visit to Don
Antonio Centell�s, with whom we found one Don Alvaro de Acuna. He
was an old gentleman, who gave lectures on the science of
debauchery. The rising generation, if they wanted to qualify
themselves for fine gentlemen, put themselves under his tuition.
He moulded their ductile habits to pleasure, taught them to make
a distinguished figure in the world, and to squander their
substance: he had no qualms as to running out his own, for the
deed was done. After these three blades had exchanged the
compliments of the morning, Centell�s said to my master — In
good faith, Don Matthias, you could not have come at a more lucky
time. Don Alvar is come to take me with him to a dinner, given by
a citizen to the Marquis de Zenette and Don Juan de Moncade; and
you shall be of the party. And what is the citizen’s name? said
Don Matthias. Gregorio de Noriega, said Don Alvar, and I will
describe the young man in two words. His father, a rich jeweller,
is gone abroad, to attend the foreign markets, and left his son,
at his departure, in the enjoyment of a large income. Gregorio is
a blockhead, with a turn for every sort of extravagance, and an
awkward hankering after the reputation of wit and fashion, in
despite of nature. He has begged of me to give him a few
instructions. I manage him completely; and can assure you,
gentlemen, that I lead him a rare dance. His estate is rather
deeply dipped already. I do not doubt it, exclaimed Centell�s; I
see the vulgar dog in an almshouse. Come, Don Matthias: let us
honour the fellow with our acquaintance, and be in at the death
of him. Willingly, answered my master, for I delight in seeing
the fortune of these plebeian upstarts kicked over, when they
affect to mix among us. Nothing, for instance, ever entertained
me so much as the downfall of the toll-gatherer’s son, whom play,
and the vanity of figuring among the great, have stripped, till
he has not a house over his head. Oh! as for that, replied Don
Alvar, he deserves no pity, he is as great a coxcomb in his
poverty as he was in his prosperity.
Centell�s and my master accompanied Don Alvar to Gregorio de
Noriega’s party. We went there also, that is, Mogicon and myself;
both in ecstasy at having an opportunity of spunging on a
citizen, and pleasing ourselves with the thought of being in at
the death of him. At our entrance, we observed several men
employed in preparing dinner; and there issued from the ragouts
they were taking up, a vapour which conciliated the palate
through the medium of the nostrils. The Marquis de Zenette and
Don Juan de Moncade were just come. The founder of the feast
seemed a great simpleton. He aped the man of fashion with a most
clumsy grace; a wretched copy of admirable originals, or, more
properly, an idiot in the chair of wisdom and taste. Figure to
yourself a man of this character in the centre of five bantering
fellows, all intent on making a jest of him, and drawing him into
ridiculous expenses. Gentlemen, said Don Alvar, after the first
interchange of civilities, give me leave to introduce you to
Signor Gregorio de Noriega, a most brilliant star in the
hemisphere of fashion. He owns a thousand amiable qualities. Do
you know that he has an highly cultivated understanding? Choose
your own subject, he is equally at home in every branch, from the
subtilty and closeness of logic, to the elementary science of the
criss-cross-row. Oh! this is really too flattering, interrupted
the scot and lot gentleman with a very uncouth laugh. I might,
Signor Alvaro, put you to the blush as you have put me; for you
may truly be termed a reservoir as it were, a common sewer of
erudition. I had no intention, replied Don Alvaro, to draw upon
myself so savoury an encomium; but truly, gentlemen, Signor
Gregorio cannot fail of establishing a name in the world. As for
me, said Don Antonio, what is so delightful in my eyes, far above
the honours of logic or the criss-cross row, is the tasteful
selection of his company. Instead of demeaning himself to the
level of tradesmen, he associates only with the young nobility,
and sets the expense at nought. There is an elevation of
sentiment in this conduct which enchants me: and this is what you
may truly call disbursing with taste and judgment.
These ironical speeches were only the preludes to a continual
strain of banter. Poor Gregorio was attacked on all hands. The
wits shot their bolts by turns, but they made no impression on
the fool; on the contrary, he took all they said literally, and
seemed highly pleased with his guests, as if they did him a
favour by making him their laughing-stock. In short, he served
them for a butt while they sat at table, which they did not quit
during the afternoon, nor till late at night. We, as well as our
masters, drank as we liked, so that the servants’-hall and the
dining-room were in equally high order when we took our leave of
the young jeweller.
CH. V. — Gil Blas becomes the darling of the fair sex, and
makes an interesting acquaintance.
AFTER some hours’ sleep I got up in fine spirits; and calling the
advice of Melendez to mind, went, till my master was stirring, to
pay my court to our steward, whose vanity was rather flattered by
this attention. He received me with a gracious air, and inquired
how I was reconciled to the habits and manners of the young
nobility. I answered, that they were strange to me as yet, but
that use and good example might work wonders in the end.
Use and good example did work wonders, and that right soon. My
temper and conduct were quite altered. From a discreet, sober
lad, I got to be a lively, heedless merry-andrew. Don Antonio’s
servant paid me a compliment on my transformation, and told me
that there wanted nothing but a tender interest in the lovely
part of the creation to shine like a new star dropped from the
heavens. He pointed out to me that it was an indispensable
requisite in the character of a pretty fellow, that all our set
were well with some fine woman or other; and that he himself; to
his own share, engrossed the favours of two beauties in high
life. I was of opinion that the rascal lied. Master Mogicon, said
I, you are doubtless a very dapper, lively little fellow, with a
modest assurance; but still I do not comprehend how women of
quality, not having your sweet person on their own private
establishments, should run the risk of being detected in an
intrigue with a footman out of doors. Oh! as for that, answered
he, they do not know my condition. To my master’s wardrobe, and
even to his name, am I indebted for these conquests. I will tell
you how it is. I dress myself up
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