An Ideal Husband, Oscar Wilde [free ebook reader TXT] 📗

>LADY CHILTERN. Good morning, Lord Goring!

 

LORD GORING. [Bowing.] Good morning, Lady Chiltern!

 

MABEL CHILTERN. [Aside to LORD GORING.] I shall be in the

conservatory under the second palm tree on the left.

 

LORD GORING. Second on the left?

 

MABEL CHILTERN. [With a look of mock surprise.] Yes; the usual palm

tree.

 

[Blows a kiss to him, unobserved by LADY CHILTERN, and goes out.]

 

LORD GORING. Lady Chiltern, I have a certain amount of very good

news to tell you. Mrs. Cheveley gave me up Robert’s letter last

night, and I burned it. Robert is safe.

 

LADY CHILTERN. [Sinking on the sofa.] Safe! Oh! I am so glad of

that. What a good friend you are to him - to us!

 

LORD GORING. There is only one person now that could be said to be

in any danger.

 

LADY CHILTERN. Who is that?

 

LORD GORING. [Sitting down beside her.] Yourself.

 

LADY CHILTERN. I? In danger? What do you mean?

 

LORD GORING. Danger is too great a word. It is a word I should not

have used. But I admit I have something to tell you that may

distress you, that terribly distresses me. Yesterday evening you

wrote me a very beautiful, womanly letter, asking me for my help.

You wrote to me as one of your oldest friends, one of your husband’s

oldest friends. Mrs. Cheveley stole that letter from my rooms.

 

LADY CHILTERN. Well, what use is it to her? Why should she not have

it?

 

LORD GORING. [Rising.] Lady Chiltern, I will be quite frank with

you. Mrs. Cheveley puts a certain construction on that letter and

proposes to send it to your husband.

 

LADY CHILTERN. But what construction could she put on it? … Oh!

not that! not that! If I in - in trouble, and wanting your help,

trusting you, propose to come to you … that you may advise me . .

. assist me … Oh! are there women so horrible as that …? And

she proposes to send it to my husband? Tell me what happened. Tell

me all that happened.

 

LORD GORING. Mrs. Cheveley was concealed in a room adjoining my

library, without my knowledge. I thought that the person who was

waiting in that room to see me was yourself. Robert came in

unexpectedly. A chair or something fell in the room. He forced his

way in, and he discovered her. We had a terrible scene. I still

thought it was you. He left me in anger. At the end of everything

Mrs. Cheveley got possession of your letter - she stole it, when or

how, I don’t know.

 

LADY CHILTERN. At what hour did this happen?

 

LORD GORING. At half-past ten. And now I propose that we tell

Robert the whole thing at once.

 

LADY CHILTERN. [Looking at him with amazement that is almost

terror.] You want me to tell Robert that the woman you expected was

not Mrs. Cheveley, but myself? That it was I whom you thought was

concealed in a room in your house, at half-past ten o’clock at night?

You want me to tell him that?

 

LORD GORING. I think it is better that he should know the exact

truth.

 

LADY CHILTERN. [Rising.] Oh, I couldn’t, I couldn’t!

 

LORD GORING. May I do it?

 

LADY CHILTERN. No.

 

LORD GORING. [Gravely.] You are wrong, Lady Chiltern.

 

LADY CHILTERN. No. The letter must be intercepted. That is all.

But how can I do it? Letters arrive for him every moment of the day.

His secretaries open them and hand them to him. I dare not ask the

servants to bring me his letters. It would be impossible. Oh! why

don’t you tell me what to do?

 

LORD GORING. Pray be calm, Lady Chiltern, and answer the questions I

am going to put to you. You said his secretaries open his letters.

 

LADY CHILTERN. Yes.

 

LORD GORING. Who is with him to-day? Mr. Trafford, isn’t it?

 

LADY CHILTERN. No. Mr. Montford, I think.

 

LORD GORING. You can trust him?

 

LADY CHILTERN. [With a gesture of despair.] Oh! how do I know?

 

LORD GORING. He would do what you asked him, wouldn’t he?

 

LADY CHILTERN. I think so.

 

LORD GORING. Your letter was on pink paper. He could recognise it

without reading it, couldn’t he? By the colour?

 

LADY CHILTERN. I suppose so.

 

LORD GORING. Is he in the house now?

 

LADY CHILTERN. Yes.

 

LORD GORING. Then I will go and see him myself, and tell him that a

certain letter, written on pink paper, is to be forwarded to Robert

to-day, and that at all costs it must not reach him. [Goes to the

door, and opens it.] Oh! Robert is coming upstairs with the letter

in his hand. It has reached him already.

 

LADY CHILTERN. [With a cry of pain.] Oh! you have saved his life;

what have you done with mine?

 

[Enter SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. He has the letter in his hand, and is

reading it. He comes towards his wife, not noticing LORD GORING’S

presence.]

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. ‘I want you. I trust you. I am coming to you.

Gertrude.’ Oh, my love! Is this true? Do you indeed trust me, and

want me? If so, it was for me to come to you, not for you to write

of coming to me. This letter of yours, Gertrude, makes me feel that

nothing that the world may do can hurt me now. You want me,

Gertrude?

 

[LORD GORING, unseen by SIR ROBERT CHILTERN, makes an imploring sign

to LADY CHILTERN to accept the situation and SIR ROBERT’S error.]

 

LADY CHILTERN. Yes.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. You trust me, Gertrude?

 

LADY CHILTERN. Yes.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. Ah! why did you not add you loved me?

 

LADY CHILTERN. [Taking his hand.] Because I loved you.

 

[LORD GORING passes into the conservatory.]

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. [Kisses her.] Gertrude, you don’t know what I

feel. When Montford passed me your letter across the table - he had

opened it by mistake, I suppose, without looking at the handwriting

on the envelope - and I read it - oh! I did not care what disgrace or

punishment was in store for me, I only thought you loved me still.

 

LADY CHILTERN. There is no disgrace in store for you, nor any public

shame. Mrs. Cheveley has handed over to Lord Goring the document

that was in her possession, and he has destroyed it.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. Are you sure of this, Gertrude?

 

LADY CHILTERN. Yes; Lord Goring has just told me.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. Then I am safe! Oh! what a wonderful thing to

be safe! For two days I have been in terror. I am safe now. How

did Arthur destroy my letter? Tell me.

 

LADY CHILTERN. He burned it.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. I wish I had seen that one sin of my youth

burning to ashes. How many men there are in modern life who would

like to see their past burning to white ashes before them! Is Arthur

still here?

 

LADY CHILTERN. Yes; he is in the conservatory.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. I am so glad now I made that speech last night

in the House, so glad. I made it thinking that public disgrace might

be the result. But it has not been so.

 

LADY CHILTERN. Public honour has been the result.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. I think so. I fear so, almost. For although I

am safe from detection, although every proof against me is destroyed,

I suppose, Gertrude … I suppose I should retire from public life?

[He looks anxiously at his wife.]

 

LADY CHILTERN. [Eagerly.] Oh yes, Robert, you should do that. It

is your duty to do that.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. It is much to surrender.

 

LADY CHILTERN. No; it will be much to gain.

 

[SIR ROBERT CHILTERN walks up and down the room with a troubled

expression. Then comes over to his wife, and puts his hand on her

shoulder.]

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. And you would be happy living somewhere alone

with me, abroad perhaps, or in the country away from London, away

from public life? You would have no regrets?

 

LADY CHILTERN. Oh! none, Robert.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. [Sadly.] And your ambition for me? You used

to be ambitious for me.

 

LADY CHILTERN. Oh, my ambition! I have none now, but that we two

may love each other. It was your ambition that led you astray. Let

us not talk about ambition.

 

[LORD GORING returns from the conservatory, looking very pleased with

himself, and with an entirely new buttonhole that some one has made

for him.]

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. [Going towards him.] Arthur, I have to thank

you for what you have done for me. I don’t know how I can repay you.

[Shakes hands with him.]

 

LORD GORING. My dear fellow, I’ll tell you at once. At the present

moment, under the usual palm tree … I mean in the conservatory .

. .

 

[Enter MASON.]

 

MASON. Lord Caversham.

 

LORD GORING. That admirable father of mine really makes a habit of

turning up at the wrong moment. It is very heartless of him, very

heartless indeed.

 

[Enter LORD CAVERSHAM. MASON goes out.]

 

LORD CAVERSHAM. Good morning, Lady Chiltern! Warmest

congratulations to you, Chiltern, on your brilliant speech last

night. I have just left the Prime Minister, and you are to have the

vacant seat in the Cabinet.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. [With a look of joy and triumph.] A seat in

the Cabinet?

 

LORD CAVERSHAM. Yes; here is the Prime Minister’s letter. [Hands

letter.]

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. [Takes letter and reads it.] A seat in the

Cabinet!

 

LORD CAVERSHAM. Certainly, and you well deserve it too. You have

got what we want so much in political life nowadays - high character,

high moral tone, high principles. [To LORD GORING.] Everything that

you have not got, sir, and never will have.

 

LORD GORING. I don’t like principles, father. I prefer prejudices.

 

[SIR ROBERT CHILTERN is on the brink of accepting the Prime

Minister’s offer, when he sees wife looking at him with her clear,

candid eyes. He then realises that it is impossible.]

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. I cannot accept this offer, Lord Caversham. I

have made up my mind to decline it.

 

LORD CAVERSHAM. Decline it, sir!

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. My intention is to retire at once from public

life.

 

LORD CAVERSHAM. [Angrily.] Decline a seat in the Cabinet, and

retire from public life? Never heard such damned nonsense in the

whole course of my existence. I beg your pardon, Lady Chiltern.

Chiltern, I beg your pardon. [To LORD GORING.] Don’t grin like

that, sir.

 

LORD GORING. No, father.

 

LORD CAVERSHAM. Lady Chiltern, you are a sensible woman, the most

sensible woman in London, the most sensible woman I know. Will you

kindly prevent your husband from making such a … from taking such

… Will you kindly do that, Lady Chiltern?

 

LADY CHILTERN. I think my husband in right in his determination,

Lord Caversham. I approve of it.

 

LORD CAVERSHAM. You approve of it? Good heavens!

 

LADY CHILTERN. [Taking her husband’s hand.] I admire him for it. I

admire him immensely for it. I have never admired him so much

before. He is finer than even I thought him. [To SIR ROBERT

CHILTERN.] You will go and write your letter to the Prime Minister

now, won’t you? Don’t hesitate about it, Robert.

 

SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. [With a touch of bitterness.] I suppose I