The Wrath of a Beaten Woman, S. Heald [best classic literature .txt] 📗

white sandals to complete the look. I straitened my long blonde hair and applied a little makeup.

My cheek was looking a lot better and with makeup it wasn’t very visible. Eric walked up behind me and kissed down my neck and shoulders. “I love you so much Maria,” he said to me in a loving soft tone. It was times like these when Eric was so amazing that he made all the bad go away. One happy moment like this could erase away all the bad ones before. I don’t know if it’s like that with everyone, but he had that power over me.

Once we arrived at the restaurant, Eric ordered a bottle of wine and romanced me all night. The restaurant we were at had a nice Italian feel and a small house band playing in the background. Eric convinced me to get up and dance with him in the magic of the moment.

While we dance he got on one knee with a ring in his hand and asked me to marry him. I was the happiest woman alive, well at least I seemed to be at the time. I said yes before I even thought about it and we slow dance and laughed for two strait songs. It had been four years of dating, and I had waited for this day to come. I knew that once we were married he would respect me. In my head being his wife would make things so much different. He then paid the bill and we headed home.

Once we made it to the house and walked up the front steps Eric said to me, “Take your dress off, I want to have you right here on the porch under the moonlight.”I thought that he must have had a little too much wine and I refused and tried to get him to go inside. I would consider myself reserved but Eric was different; he was demanding and always wanted to try new things sexually.

“Sweetie, we have neighbors, and I don’t feel comfortable doing that. Let’s just go inside and enjoy the rest of the evening, “I said to him as loving as I possibly could. “I think you should just what you’re told to do. I give you a ring and ask you to marry me and you can’t even do one thing for me?” When he said it like that, it made me second guess myself. He was right; I needed to be more spontaneous with him.

I must have been lost in thought because he pushed me towards the door giving into my request against his own wishes. Once we were inside behind the closed front door he backhanded me pushing me into the wall. "When I tell you to do something, I expect you to obey. You are my fiancé now and you will respect me!" He yelled. I was speechless. I thought the night was going so well and I didn’t understand what I had done to upset him so much.

He then whispered in my ear, "Take your dress off now." I gave into his game and slipped out of the sundress slowly. I just stared back into his empty eyes waiting on his next move. I knew the way he treated me was wrong, but some dark place inside of me needed his touch and needed to be owned the way only he could do. Yes I was defiantly sick in so many ways.

Eric walked around me in a circle like an animal stalking its prey. His voice called to me in a stern hard tone, "Get on your knees." I hesitated for a moment but did as he said. I was intoxicated by his glaring and wanted to know what he would do next.

Moments like these made me think that if I were to leave him, I would never find another man that would please me in this manner. He had made every fantasy I could ever imagine come to life and that was just another reason I needed him so.

I could hear him fidgeting with his zipper and then his pants and belt hit the floor. His hands were cold as he picked up my hips and brought my body close to his wrapping my legs around his waist. He then had his way with me like he had so many other times. I panted and moaned with him knowing that he enjoyed the game even more than I did. Once he climaxed, he left me to my thoughts as he went to shower.

As I sat up and leaned against the wall, I looked down at the ring he had given me only an hour or two before. It was beautiful. Vintage, with a nice size diamond and it had engraving on the inside that read, Always in my Heart. How could he do such sweet things and then be so evil at other times. The million dollar question had played through my mind so many times.

Chapter 5

The next few days seemed to be better. I thought that everything was actually close to perfect. That was until Eric started staying at work longer and working more often than before. He would always have a couple nights a week he went out with his friends, but I never minded much because he was home the other nights. Now that he was working more, it seemed like between work and his friends we were rarely together.

It was a Friday night and I had dinner ready waiting on Eric to get home from work. By the time that he got home dinner was cold and it was way past dark. I could smell the stench of alcohol on his breath and his steps weren’t as sober as he would have liked. I was fuming.

"How can you go out drinking after work knowing that I am sitting here waiting on you for dinner? You should have called!" I yelled at him. He wasn’t use to me raising my voice to him and obviously wasn’t happy about it. He came charging across the counter towards me. I stumbled out of his way just out of reach when he came at me again shoving me into the wall.
"Don’t you ever speak to me like that you ungrateful bitch!" He spat in my face. I held my hand up trying to block his fist as he tried to hit me. He wanted a fight and now he had one.

He knocked me off of my feet and drug me to the bedroom. I was kicking and fighting him the whole time but it was no use. He was a giant compared to me and much stronger. I could tell my lip was busted from the metallic taste that seeped around my mouth as he snatched me up and bend me over the bed pinning his weight on top of me.

In no time he had my shorts pulled down and his pants pooled around his feet as his massive erection invaded me without permission. I tried to get him off by clawing at his hands that pinned mine behind my back but he never stopped. He didn’t stop until his seed was dripping from me onto the bed that we had made love in so many times. My cheeks were stained with tears of anger as I felt overcome with shame and defeat.

We didn’t speak after that for several days. He would go about his way and I would do the same. I was hurt and wanted an apology of some sort; although I knew it wouldn’t be enough. I can’t tell you how many times I had packed that bag to leave but before I could get it zipped I would start to unpack it again. Why did I let him do this to me and why had I allowed him to own me like this. I was scared of life without him, even though I knew it would be so much better.

A few days later I scheduled an appointment with my gynaecologist to make sure everything was up to date and to also to talk to the doctor about my fertility. I didn’t tell Eric about my appointment for reasons I wasn’t sure of. The last thing I needed was for him to want to bring a child into the picture right now.

While taking a shower I let the hot water flow over my body. I watched as soap suds collected around the drain and I was once again lost in thought. My mind was telling me that I needed to get out, but my heart was very unwilling to listen. As my mind was racing I decided to shave my legs and pamper myself for a moment. I ran the razor up my leg as I examined a new bruise from the previous night’s encounter.

I was starting to hate myself for allowing him to win. Thinking back I remember the cold day he left to go on a business trip for two days and I had tried to overdose on pain pills to be set free from the hurt and disaster my life had become. I guess not even drugs would set me free though, because I went to sleep that night expecting never to wake up, but like clockwork my blaring alarm woke me the next morning.

Now instead of hurting myself, I caught myself thinking of poising him, or running away in the night, away from him and the life we had made together, but I knew that was unlikely because his love would overpower any thought I had of escape. I know I sounded pitiful but he had me right where he wanted me and I had let him win.

Chapter 6

On the day of my appointment I got up and got ready, looking forward to getting out and about. It was a beautiful day outside with no clouds in sight. There was a slight breeze and the trees were caressed by it as I hopped in my car. After having my exam at the doctor’s office, I awaited results. The doctor walked in with a frown on his face. He took one look at my face and then looked away. He pulled out a pamphlet from my chart and handed it to me. The front of it read, 'How to handle life with Hepatitis'.”

A sickness started growing in my stomach. The realization of what was happening seemed to have punched me in the stomach harder than Eric ever had. What was the doctor saying? Eric had been my first and only partner in bed so I knew that if I had acquired an STD that it would be from him. Had he been cheating on me? Or did he know of this before we were together and never told me?

Seeming to read my mind the doctor stopped talking and got my attention, “Ms Sinclair, if you need to talk to someone, I know a great counsellor who has dealt with similar cases. I will give you her card.” I still didn’t respond to his statements. All I could do was tear up and stare into thin air.

He called after a nurse to come in and talk with me and answer any questions I had. She was looking at me like I was a diseased dog or a leper. I was ashamed and hurt. My stomach was screaming and all I wanted to do was get in my car and drive.

Driving home I debated to