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he expected me to agree with everything he was saying. I do not want to be controlled by anyone. I told him he did not own my life. He of course denied that he was trying to control my life. I was getting really angry with him and it was getting to the point where I could not control myself.

I remember the day, it was a Thursday that I had a break down. He said that I owed him something for always yelling at him. When he says you owe him something it means you have to do whatever he wants. I got pissed off. I said to him “just because I yell at you does not mean I owe you. You don’t deserve anything from me so no I do not owe you”.

That day I knew that something was going to happen the next day. I knew we were going to have a fight. That Friday at lunch he repeatedly threw a water bottle at me. I took the bottle and threw it in the garbage. That’s when all this bad stuff started happening.

That day he got his water bottle and came over to me and punched me in the face. That’s when we had a fight, a small one. I defended myself and punched him back. Soon after the fight started I decided to stop it. I never like hurting people so I stopped and walked away. That was the first fight we ever had but our battle had just begun.

 

 

 

The Battle Begins

I wish I would have listened to Ms. Thorne, the security guard. It turned out she was right. I wish I had not given her that attitude when she told me not to hang out with Barrett. She would have stopped all the arguments we had and all the yelling I did. I would have apologized to her but I was so embarrassed. I couldn’t hear her when she first told me to stay away from him. My relationshisp with Ms. Thorne bothered me. I mean I respected her so much before that incident. Then when she did that I could barely look at her. Then the fight happened with Barrett and I felt bad for giving her an attitude. I think if she would have been a little nicer I might have listened to her. Or maybe I just had to go through it before I learned.

My mother complained to the principal about Barrett punching me in the face. She insisted that the school do something. She persisted until the principal decided to suspend him.

After that fight and the threatened suspension I hoped that it would be the end of the fighting. I also knew that it was the end of our friendship. I thought we could just not talk to each other. That did not work out. The same evening of the fight I got a call from an unknown number. I picked up the phone and it was the twins. Barrett had told them to choose between me and him. I was shocked. How could he ask them to choose? They told me if they had to choose they would choose me. I told them that I had no interest in making them choose. Barrett was trying to take away my friends. Then I knew that our fight would not be over for a while.

Those last weeks of school were torture. Barrett and I were not talking and he was trying to take away my friends. I tried to make amends by trying to have a conversation with Barrett to fix the problem. It seemed like that was working or that’s what I thought. The next day I found out he was trying to be my friend so he did not have to get suspended. I was really mad at him for trying to escape his punishment for punching me.

It ended there officially because he decided that if I was not going to let him get away with hitting me, that I was not his friend. Also the principal said we should stay away from each other, which was fine with me. I was fine not being friends with him. I just was not prepared for what it would mean. I was confused and angry. I thought about how he did not deserve to have me as a friend. I started writing songs; mean songs to express how I was feeling. I tried everything I could think of to get him to stop coming between me and my friends. I tried to make deals with him.

One of the deals I made was that we both had separate days with the twins. Like I would have Monday and he would have Tuesday, I would have Wednesday etc. He refused, he wanted to have them all to himself. I did not agree of course but I was mad he would not make an agreement. So we argued the rest of the school year.

I finally told the twins that if they were going to hang out with Barrett I could not be there. They said they understood and would not hang out with him if I was there.

Then I went to Canada and missed school for a week. When I came back it was in the afternoon and I missed school that day. When school was out I went to hang out with the twins at their house, with my sister Jazmine. When we got there we saw Barrett. Then I called the twins and asked them what he was doing there. They said he came over their house, even though they told him not to.

I was mad at Barrett but I pretended he was not there and went to hang out with the twins. As we were walking to the park Barrett saw 7 tall Black kids and said “run, run black kids”. I yelled at him, “don’t be racist, you don’t say that, you’re going to get us in trouble”. The 7 kids were already on their way back to us. They came up to us and asked angrily, “what did you say”?

I remember being so scared and then Barrett got punched in the face. One of the kids started coming up to me and then my sister stepped in and cursed him out. I guess it would be important to let you know that Jazmine is Black. (Although I don’t understand why it should be important). Then they left and threw a bottle at Barrett on the way out. I was angry and scared because it could have turned out worse. Barrett was shocked and held his face while Jazmine asked him if he was ok. He said he was fine and he did not want to go home.

Barrett then started cursing me out. He said, “you bitch, you caused me to get punched in the face”. At first I was confused. Was I to blame? I said, “what are you talking about? You are the one who insulted them because they were Black. He said “yah but you said that I was being racist and they came back”. No, I yelled, “they came back because you insulted them, you said that not me”.

That’s when Jazmine stepped in and told him off. She said “I don’t care how hurt you are, you do not talk to my sister like that.” He said “I don’t care, you can’t do anything to me”. Jazmine told him “oh yes I can” and she would not stand down. Barrett wouldn’t stand down either. I just watched him say all the bad things he should not have said. After we left Jazmine told me that she had never seen me so angry before. I laughed and said I never wanted to show her that part of me.

That’s when I got a call from my mom. My mom was really angry because she got a call from Mary, Barrett’s mom. I rushed home and told my mom everything that happened. That’s when she showed me the voicemail that she got from Mary. The message said that I was getting her son Barrett in trouble and following Barrett. She said that my mom should control me.

When I heard that message I was so mad at Barrett’s mom. She pretended to be my friend and then when she talked to my mom, I was suddenly evil. She was so two faced. I remember wanting to just yell at her. I felt so betrayed. She was helping Barrett to keep me from hanging out with the twins. I was going to have to try to ignore her along with Barrett.

 

 

 

 

The Summer Vacation

That summer for me was ok although it was a little boring. I was staying in different places because our kitchen was under construction and I’m asthmatic. So I could not see the twins because I wasn’t in the neighborhood. I was very sad about that and missed them a lot.

August 11th 2012 was my birthday party. I invited the twins and they came over and met my whole family. During the party my sisters and I talked to the twins about Barrett. The twins said they hated hanging out with him because he was pushy mean and aggressive. We told them that if they hated hanging out with him they should not hang out with him. I also told them that Barrett was ruining our friendship. They agreed and said they would not hang out with him after the summer ended.

My family is Jewish but not very religious. So because it was my thirteenth birthday, they decided to follow tradition and lifted me up in a chair and we all sang a Jewish song. I laughed while my little brother got scared and started to cry. I had so much fun that day. I never wanted it to end.

Since I had a summer without any problems with Barett I thought all my problems with him were over. I was very wrong.

One weekend I went upstate. When I was on my way back I got the surprise of my life. The twins texted me saying that Barrett and his mom had told their grandma that me and my mom were sluts. Then he told me that his grandma said that we couldn’t hang out anymore.

That news hurt and shocked me. Thanks

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