Taking the Risk, Amaunet Jendayi [book recommendations website .txt] 📗

I equals 5 brothers." He looks up at the ceiling trying to think what else to tell Dr. Morris, shaking his head he starts with schooling, "Uhh, I went to school until my 10th grade year, then dropped out because it was boring. I felt as though I was too smart for all that mess they were trying to teach us. My oldest sisters got much of my parents praise because they went on and went to college to 'be someone' as my parents put it. All the while, I and my second older brother; Sylis. Got none. No praise, no love, or affection. All my other siblings went to be their own persons, you know."

 

Dr. Morris nods making notes. Patrick continues jumping from schooling to his siblings to his father, "The first time dad hit mom was when I was 13 years old. He hit her because dinner wasn't ready when he got home from a very hard and long day of work." Patrick frowns slightly, remembering the way his mother swirled about when his father hit her, "It was scary, the way she swirled around and would catch herself on the counter, but he told me that's how a man...real men keep their bitches, females in line. So, I went with that. Me and my brother.

 

Dad started hitting her more frequently. For whatever reason, clothes, shoes, dinner, noise, dirty house, anything would really set him off."

 

Dr. Morris nods. Patrick goes on, "But things changed when I and my brother; Sylis got home from school; mom wasn't there. Instead, there were police cars and an ambulance in front of the house. Neighbors from other hoods came to be nosy. My siblings gathered ar-." He starts to choke up and covers his eyes, "They told us that dad had beaten mom into a coma and they had taken her to the hospital."

 

He huffs out some air in order to keep the tears from spilling from his eyes. It's been a long time since he's told anyone this; the death of his mother. The only person he has ever told was Aynslee. "I lashed out and the cops had to put me in handcuffs and had me to sit in the back of the squad car. Dad was being hauled off to jail or prison. The next day, mom was pronounced brain dead. So, we; as siblings decided to say our goodbyes to her and have them pull the plug. The living arrangements worked out to where: I and my brother; Sylis stayed with our oldest brother; Daedrus and his wife Haelyn until college. We didn't want anyone going to an orphanage and knew that mom wanted us to stay together." He rubs the tears from his face, "whoop."

 

Dr. Morris nods and looks at Patrick and nods at the tissue box sitting beside him on the sofa. He takes a tissue and wipes his face as Dr. Morris began, "So, you developed that from your father? Correct? The abusive part."

 

Patrick nods, "Yeah, I even suggested it to Daedrus for his head strong wife, but he wouldn't and told me that hitting a female is a punk's move." Patrick scoffs and raises his voice a little, "She always walked all over him. Telling him to do things she should be doing."

 

"Such as?"

 

"Cooking for one. Cleaning, changing diapers...you get the idea. All she did was run around on him and fuck with other dudes."

 

"Did she work?"

 

"Hell if I knew. She was hardly there. So, I never got to ask. But when I was 17 they kicked me out for raising my hand to their 3 and 4 year old daughters."

 

Horrified, Dr. Morris asks, "You were going to strike their kids? For what reason?" Disgust filled the Doctor's stomach as he felt the bile rise up in his chest. He chokes it back.

 

"Making too much noise, I had homework to do for my GED class. So, I just raised my hand as if I was going to hit them. It was to scare them. Daedrus kicked me out, I told Sylis but he betrayed me and stayed. That left me homeless for about a good year and a half."

 

"That's when you got into the game drug?" Doctor questions.

 

"Right and when I caught my first charge also when I met Aynslee."

 

"Okay. Hard childhood. Adult hood a little worse."

 

Patrick nods and leans forward.

 

Dr. Morris goes on, "You met Aynslee during," He flips through pages of the notepad and stops at the middle, "Her college years?"

 

Patrick nods. "Actually..."

 

Dr. Morris looks up, "I met Aynslee in high school before I met Noelle. So, it was before I dropped out however, there were two Aynslee's. There was the one I dated and the slutty cheerleader. So, when they would talk bad about one I always thought they were-."

 

"Talking about your Aynslee?"

 

"Right. Which they probably were but I didn't say anything about it to anyone. I just made my own assumptions." Patrick says nodding his head, knowing that they already touched on this subject. But, he didn't mind repeating it so the Doctor could take it down again.

 

Dr. Morris; in his profession isn't allowed to judge or make judgments but the way life is/was for Patrick seemed all wrong. Really wrong. But, who is he to make that kind of judgment? Not God.

 

"So, you and Aynslee met in high school along with Noelle."

 

Patrick nods at the statement.

 

"Alright. Aynslee didn't want to date you in high school?"

 

"Uhh..." He nods, "yeah. Cause I was dating Noelle." He confirms.

 

Dr. Morris nods and jots that down. "But, in college, despite you still dating Noelle and being engaged to her. You still tried to get with Aynslee?" He asks going over notes from the notepad.

 

"Correct."

 

Dr. Morris looks at his notes and none of it made any sense to him. None! He drops his pend and rubs the bridge of his nose.

 

"Okay. Freshman year of high school, I met Noelle and Aynslee, they were best friends." Patrick begins breaking down the relationship of the love triangle.

 

Dr. Morris nods and picks up his pen and begins writing what Patrick is saying down to try and get a better perspective of what Patrick is saying and thinking. His fucked up thought process.

 

"Aynslee was serious about her grades and wouldn't date me. So, I dated Noelle instead, since she wanted to be with me and she was not bad looking either."

 

"Okay." He continues to write.

 

"So...I dropped out but still dated Noelle then I moved and found Aynslee at College campus."

 

"Okay. So, she got out of the hood?"

 

"Yeah. She let me pay for her books sometimes. And then that's when she and I started dating." Patrick says trying to get his own mind right and make sure he is saying the right things at the right time.

 

"She didn't know about Noelle?" Dr. Morris squints.

 

"No. She asked, but I always dodged the question."

 

"Two-timed?"

 

Patrick chuckles, "Damn, Doc. The way you make it sound..."

 

"Yeah, well...that's what it is called when you date two people at the same time."

 

Patrick blinks then a smirk, "Well, that's the thing with us drug dealers. But," his face turns serious, "we aren't pimps."

 

Dr. Morris nods but he didn't really understand that concept or Patrick's frame of mind. Still frustrated, Dr. Morris says, "Alright, I do believe our time is up." He looks at the wall clock above the bookcase full of legal books and patient behavior books. "Yeah." Dr. Morris wraps up the session as Patrick stands up.

 

"Thanks, Doc."

 

"You're welcome." He says secretly glad that he is leaving. His thought process is so dysfunctional that Dr. Morris wanted to shank him himself with the pen he was jotting down the notes with.

 

 

 

Patrick leaves nodding yet feeling good but horrible at the same time as he was confessing his wrongs to Dr. Morris. Everything plagued him from his mother's untimely death by the hands of his father to himself putting a hit on Aynslee and getting her strung out on drugs. Without warning an emotional wave hit him, which makes him stop in the middle of the empty hallway. Leaning against the cool wall, he looks at the ceiling. "Damn, I really messed up big time, mama."

 

A tear falls from his eye, quickly he wipes it away when he hears footsteps coming. Getting off the wall, Patrick continues to walk down the hallway and passes Officer Sheyn escorting another inmate to Dr. Morris office. Patrick kept his head down as to make sure they didn't see the ram emotion coming from him. Especially, the inmate that's being escorted. The inmate is a whole different story. Once in the general population area, Patrick shook off all of the emotion and mumbles, "She deserves it, for messing with those other niggas."

 

He smiles and finds a group of his friends.

 

10

Aynslee

 

(6 months later)

 

 Aynslee wipes her hands on her gray baggy sweat pants as she finished moving the last box into her two bedroom condo. She looks around at the mess of boxes, her sister then hobbles up the stairs and plops down on the leather blue sofa in the living room. Luna huffs and places a hand on her growing belly.

 

"That was hard work," Luna says throwing her hand back, resting it on the back of the sofa.

 

Aynslee flips her now curly hair and turns smirking at her sister, "What you mean? You only carried 2 lamps and 1 chair."

 

 Luna lifts her head up enough to see Aynslee standing with her hands on her hips and her lips pursed together. "Pregnant. Hello!" She circles her belly with both hands while kicking off her shoes.

 

Aynslee shakes her head and begins to unpack the boxes marked in green Sharpe "Dishes". She had to move out of Tyson's house, he'd become overly possessive to the point where Aynslee barely made it to her interview with the computer company Noelle told her about. She didn't understand what was wrong with these guys she chose. At first they'd be really sweet to her but when she tries to get something going for herself, they changed into complete monster demons.

 

Though, Tyson didn't hit her, Aynslee wasn't about to stay around until he did so. She'd been in the hospital too many times, so many that 90% of the nurses and doctors know her by name along with her chart. Plus, now she has a job and signed a sign in bonus which is how she was able to get her condo on the decent side of town.

 

Silently putting up the dishes, when she hear her sister lightly snoring. Sound asleep in the sofa with her hand resting gently on her belly. Aynslee smiles and moves onto the next task. Entering her bedroom, the master bedroom she nearly trips over a box and a small baggy falls out of her pocket. She catches herself and then eyes the baggy, snatching it up. Examining it, she sits on the bed, the mattresses of the bed. Sighing, she fiddles with the baggy and stares at the white and yellow substance tightly wrapped in the baggy. She inhales the smell of the baggy and closes her eyes. It smells of the honey crisp apples she use to eat as a little girl.

 

It has helped her in a lot of situations, the mind of a druggie. The call of