His Masterpiece, Emile Zola [read ebook pdf .TXT] 📗

To Tell Him The Truth,  But Hurt At Heart By

This Injustice. He,  However,  Went On Chaffing Her About The Coppers

She Juggled Away To Buy Herself Things With; And Getting More And More

Excited,  Amid The Egotism Of Feelings Which He Seemingly Wished To

Keep To Himself,  He Suddenly Flew Out At Jacques.

 

'Hold Your Noise,  You Brat!--You Drive One Mad.'

 

The Child,  Forgetting All About His Dinner,  Had Been Tapping The Edge

Of His Plate With His Spoon,  His Eyes Full Of Mirthful Delight At This

Music.

 

'Jacques,  Be Quiet,' Scoldingly Said His Mother,  In Her Turn. 'Let

Your Father Have His Dinner In Peace.'

 

Then The Little One,  Abashed,  At Once Became Very Quiet,  And Relapsed

Into Gloomy Stillness,  With His Lustreless Eyes Fixed On His Potatoes,

Which,  However,  He Did Not Eat.

 

Part 8 Pg 160

Claude Made A Show Of Stuffing Himself With Cheese,  While Christine,

Quite Grieved,  Offered To Fetch Some Cold Meat From A Ham And Beef

Shop; But He Declined,  And Prevented Her Going By Words That Pained

Her Still More. Then,  The Table Having Been Cleared,  They All Sat

Round The Lamp For The Evening,  She Sewing,  The Little One Turning

Over A Picture-Book In Silence,  And Claude Drumming On The Table With

His Fingers,  His Mind The While Wandering Back To The Spot Whence He

Had Come. Suddenly He Rose,  Sat Down Again With A Sheet Of Paper And A

Pencil,  And Began Sketching Rapidly,  In The Vivid Circle Of Light That

Fell From Under The Lamp-Shade. And Such Was His Longing To Give

Outward Expression To The Tumultuous Ideas Beating In His Skull,  That

Soon This Sketch Did Not Suffice For His Relief. On The Contrary,  It

Goaded Him On,  And He Finished By Unburthening His Mind In A Flood Of

Words. He Would Have Shouted To The Walls; And If He Addressed Himself

To His Wife It Was Because She Happened To Be There.

 

'Look,  That's What We Saw Yesterday. It's Magnificent. I Spent Three

Hours There To-Day. I've Got Hold Of What I Want--Something Wonderful,

Something That'll Knock Everything Else To Pieces. Just Look! I

Station Myself Under The Bridge; In The Immediate Foreground I Have

The Port Of St. Nicolas,  With Its Crane,  Its Lighters Which Are Being

Unloaded,  And Its Crowd Of Labourers. Do You See The Idea--It's Paris

At Work--All Those Brawny Fellows Displaying Their Bare Arms And

Chests? Then On The Other Side I Have The Swimming-Baths--Paris At

Play--And Some Skiff There,  No Doubt,  To Occupy The Centre Of The

Composition; But Of That I Am Not As Yet Certain. I Must Feel My Way.

As A Matter Of Course,  The Seine Will Be In The Middle,  Broad,

Immense.'

 

While Talking,  He Kept On Indicating Outlines With His Pencil,

Thickening His Strokes Over And Over Again,  And Tearing The Paper In

His Very Energy. She,  In Order To Please Him,  Bent Over The Sketch,

Pretending To Grow Very Interested In His Explanations. But There Was

Such A Labyrinth Of Lines,  Such A Confusion Of Summary Details,  That

She Failed To Distinguish Anything.

 

'You Are Following Me,  Aren't You?'

 

'Yes,  Yes,  Very Beautiful Indeed.'

 

'Then I Have The Background,  The Two Arms Of The Rivet With Their

Quays,  The Cite,  Rising Up Triumphantly In The Centre,  And Standing

Out Against The Sky. Ah! That Background,  What A Marvel! People See It

Every Day,  Pass Before It Without Stopping; But It Takes Hold Of One

All The Same; One's Admiration Accumulates,  And One Fine Afternoon It

Bursts Forth. Nothing In The World Can Be Grander; It Is Paris

Herself,  Glorious In The Sunlight. Ah! What A Fool I Was Not To Think

Of It Before! How Many Times I Have Looked At It Without Seeing!

However,  I Stumbled On It After That Ramble Along The Quays! And,  Do

You Remember,  There's A Dash Of Shadow On That Side; While Here The

Sunrays Fall Quite Straight. The Towers Are Yonder; The Spire Of The

Sainte-Chapelle Tapers Upward,  As Slim As A Needle Pointing To The

Sky. But No,  It's More To The Right. Wait,  I'll Show You.'

 

He Began Again,  Never Wearying,  But Constantly Retouching The Sketch,

And Adding Innumerable Little Characteristic Details Which His

Painter's Eye Had Noticed; Here The Red Signboard Of A Distant Shop

Part 8 Pg 161

Vibrated In The Light; Closer By Was A Greenish Bit Of The Seine,  On

Whose Surface Large Patches Of Oil Seemed To Be Floating; And Then

There Was The Delicate Tone Of A Tree,  The Gamut Of Greys Supplied By

The House Frontages,  And The Luminous Cast Of The Sky. She

Complaisantly Approved Of All He Said And Tried To Look Delighted.

 

But Jacques Once Again Forgot What He Had Been Told. After Long

Remaining Silent Before His Book,  Absorbed In The Contemplation Of A

Wood-Cut Depicting A Black Cat,  He Began To Hum Some Words Of His Own

Composition: 'Oh,  You Pretty Cat; Oh,  You Ugly Cat; Oh,  You Pretty,

Ugly Cat,' And So On,  _Ad Infinitum_,  Ever In The Same Lugubrious

Manner.

 

Claude,  Who Was Made Fidgety By The Buzzing Noise,  Did Not At First

Understand What Was Upsetting Him. But After A Time The Child's

Harassing Phrase Fell Clearly Upon His Ear.

 

'Haven't You Done Worrying Us With Your Cat?' He Shouted Furiously.

 

'Hold Your Tongue,  Jacques,  When Your Father Is Talking!' Repeated

Christine.

 

Upon My Word,  I Do Believe He Is Becoming An Idiot. Just Look At His

Head,  If It Isn't Like An Idiot's. It's Dreadful. Just Say; What Do

You Mean By Your Pretty And Ugly Cat?'

 

The Little Fellow,  Turning Pale And Wagging His Big Head,  Looked

Stupid,  And Replied: 'Don't Know.'

 

Then,  As His Father And Mother Gazed At Each Other With A Discouraged

Air,  He Rested His Cheek On The Open Picture-Book,  And Remained Like

That,  Neither Stirring Nor Speaking,  But With His Eyes Wide Open.

 

It Was Getting Late; Christine Wanted To Put Him To Bed,  But Claude

Had Already Resumed His Explanations. He Now Told Her That,  The Very

Next Morning,  He Should Go And Make A Sketch On The Spot,  Just In

Order To Fix His Ideas. And,  As He Rattled On,  He Began To Talk Of

Buying A Small Camp Easel,  A Thing Upon Which He Had Set His Heart For

Months. He Kept Harping On The Subject,  And Spoke Of Money Matters

Till She At Last Became Embarrassed,  And Ended By Telling Him Of

Everything--The Last Copper She Had Spent That Morning,  And The Silk

Dress She Had Pledged In Order To Dine That Evening. Thereupon He

Became Very Remorseful And Affectionate; He Kissed Her And Asked Her

Forgiveness For Having Complained About The Dinner. She Would Excuse

Him,  Surely; He Would Have Killed Father And Mother,  As He Kept On

Repeating,  When That Confounded Painting Got Hold Of Him. As For The

Pawn-Shop,  It Made Him Laugh; He Defied Misery.

 

'I Tell You That We Are All Right,' He Exclaimed. 'That Picture Means

Success.'

 

She Kept Silent,  Thinking About Her Meeting Of The Morning,  Which She

Wished To Hide From Him; But Without Apparent Cause Or Transition,  In

The Kind Of Torpor That Had Come Over Her,  The Words She Would Have

Kept Back Rose Invincibly To Her Lips.

 

'Madame Vanzade Is Dead,' She Said.

 

Part 8 Pg 162

He Looked Surprised. Ah! Really? How Did She,  Christine,  Know It?

 

'I Met The Old Man-Servant. Oh,  He's A Gentleman By Now,  Looking Very

Sprightly,  In Spite Of His Seventy Years. I Did Not Know Him Again. It

Was He Who Spoke To Me. Yes,  She Died Six Weeks Ago. Her Millions Have

Gone To Various Charities,  With The Exception Of An Annuity To The Old

Servants,  Upon Which They Are Living Snugly Like People Of The

Middle-Classes.'

 

He Looked At Her,  And At Last Murmured,  In A Saddened Voice: 'My Poor

Christine,  You Are Regretting Things Now,  Aren't You? She Would Have

Given You A Marriage Portion,  Have Found You A Husband! I Told You So

In Days Gone By. She Would,  Perhaps,  Have Left You All Her Money,  And

You Wouldn't Now Be Starving With A Crazy Fellow Like Myself.'

 

She Then Seemed To Wake From Her Dream. She Drew Her Chair To His,

Caught Hold Of One Of His Arms And Nestled Against Him,  As If Her

Whole Being Protested Against His Words:

 

'What Are You Saying? Oh! No; Oh! No. It Would Have Been Shameful To

Have Thought Of Her Money. I Would Confess It To You If It Were The

Case,  And You Know That I Never Tell Lies; But I Myself Don't Know

What Came Over Me When I Heard The News. I Felt Upset And Saddened,  So

Sad That I Imagined Everything Was Over For Me. It Was No Doubt

Remorse; Yes,  Remorse At Having Deserted Her So Brutally,  Poor Invalid

That She Was,  The Good Old Soul Who Called Me Her Daughter! I Behaved

Very Badly,  And It Won't Bring Me Luck. Ah! Don't Say "No," I Feel It

Well Enough; Henceforth There's An End To Everything For Me.'

 

Then She Wept,  Choked By Those Confused Regrets,  The Significance Of

Which She Failed To Understand,  Regrets Mingling With The One Feeling

That Her Life Was Spoilt,  And That She Now Had Nothing But Unhappiness

Before Her.

 

'Come,  Wipe Your Eyes,' Said Claude,  Becoming Affectionate Once More.

'Is It Possible That You,  Who Were Never Nervous,  Can Conjure Up

Chimeras And Worry Yourself In This Way? Dash It All,  We Shall Get Out

Of Our Difficulties! First Of All,  You Know That It Was Through You

That I Found The Subject For My Picture. There Cannot Be Much Of A

Curse Upon You,  Since You Bring Me Luck.'

 

He Laughed,  And She Shook Her Head,  Seeing Well Enough That He Wanted

To Make Her Smile. She Was Suffering On Account Of His Picture

Already; For On The Bridge He Had Completely Forgotten Her,  As If She

Had Ceased To Belong To Him! And,  Since The Previous Night,  She Had

Realised That He Was Farther And Farther Removed From Her,  Alone In A

World To Which She Could Not Ascend. But She Allowed Him To Soothe

Her,  And They Exchanged One Of Their Kisses Of Yore,  Before Rising

From The Table To Retire To Rest.

 

Little Jacques Had Heard Nothing. Benumbed By His Stillness,  He Had

Fallen Asleep,  With His Cheek On His Picture-Book; And His Big Head,

So Heavy At Times That It Bent His Neck,  Looked Pale In The Lamplight.

Poor Little Offspring Of Genius,  Which,  When It Begets At All,  So

Often Begets Idiocy Or Physical Imperfection!