The Book of the Thousand Nights and a Night, vol 8, Sir Richard Francis Burton [feel good fiction books .txt] 📗

knewest thou I would sell it at this price?” Whereupon the Jew gave him two more dinars and said, “Take these five ducats for thy fish and leave greed.” So Khalifah hent the five dinars in hand and went away, rejoicing, and gazing and marvelling at the gold and saying, “Glory be to God! There is not with the Caliph of Baghdad what is with me this day!” Then he ceased not faring on till he came to the end of the marketstreet, when he remembered the words of the ape and his charge, and returning to the Jew, threw him back the gold. Quoth he, “What aileth thee, O

Khalifah? Dost thou want silver in exchange for gold?” Khalifah replied, “I want nor dirhams nor dinars. I only want thee to give me back folk’s fish.” With this the Jew waxed wroth and shouted out at him, saying, “O fisherman, thou bringest me a fish not worth a sequin and I give thee five for it; yet art thou not content! Art thou Jinn-mad? Tell me for how much thou wilt sell it.” Answered Khalifah, “I will not sell it for silver nor for gold, only for two sayings [FN#206] thou shalt say me.” When the Jew heard speak of the “Two Sayings,” his eyes sank into his head, he breathed hard and ground his teeth for rage and said to him, “O nail-paring of the Moslems, wilt thou have me throw off my faith for the sake of thy fish, and wilt thou debauch me from my religion and stultify my belief and my conviction which I inherited of old from my forbears?” Then he cried out to the servants who were in waiting and said, “Out on you! Bash me this unlucky rogue’s neck and bastinado him soundly!” So they came down upon him with blows and ceased not beating him till he fell beneath the shop, and the Jew said to them, “Leave him and let him rise.” Whereupon Khalifah jumped up, as if naught ailed him, and the Jew said to him, “Tell me what price thou asketh for this fish and I will give it thee: for thou hast gotten but scant good of us this day.” Answered the Fisherman, “Have no fear for me, O

master, because of the beating; for I can eat ten donkeys’

rations of stick.” The Jew laughed at his words and said, “Allah upon thee, tell me what thou wilt have and by the right of my Faith, I will give it thee!” The Fisherman replied, “Naught from thee will remunerate me for this fish save the two words whereof I spake.” And the Jew said, “Meseemeth thou wouldst have me become a Moslem?” [FN#207] Khalifah rejoined, “By Allah, O Jew, an thou islamise �twill nor advantage the Moslems nor damage the Jews; and in like manner, an thou hold to thy misbelief �twill nor damage the Moslems nor advantage the Jews. But what I desire of thee is that thou rise to thy feet and say, �Bear witness against me, O people of the market, that I barter my ape for the ape of Khalifah the Fisherman and my lot in the world for his lot and my luck for his luck.’” Quoth the Jew, “If this be all thou desirest �twill sit lightly upon me.” —And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased saying her permitted say.

 

When it was the Eight Hundred and Thirty-fifth Night, She resumed, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that the Jew said to Khalifah the Fisherman, “If this be all thou desirest, �twill sit lightly upon me.” So he rose without stay or delay and standing on his feet, repeated the required words; after which he turned to the Fisherman and asked him, “Hast thou aught else to ask of me?” “No,” answered he, and the Jew said, “Go in peace!” Hearing this Khalifah sprung to his feet forthright; took up his basket and net and returned straight to the Tigris, where he threw his net and pulled it in. He found it heavy and brought it not ashore but with travail, when he found it full of fish of all kinds. Presently, up came a woman with a dish, who gave me a dinar, and he gave her fish for it; and after her an eunuch, who also bought a dinar’s worth of fish, and so forth till he had sold ten dinars’ worth. And he continued to sell ten dinars’ worth of fish daily for ten days, till he had gotten an hundred dinars. Now Khalifah the Fisherman had quarters in the Passage of the Merchants, [FN#208] and, as he lay one night in his lodging much bemused with Hashish, he said to himself, “O

Khalifah, the folk all know thee for a poor fisherman, and now thou hast gotten an hundred golden dinars. Needs must the Commander of the Faithful, Harun al-Rashid, hear of this from some one, and haply he will be wanting money and will send for thee and say to thee, �I need a sum of money and it hath reached me that thou hast an hundred dinars: so do thou lend them to me those same.’ I shall answer, �O Commander of the Faithful, I am a poor man, and whoso told thee that I had an hundred dinars lied against me; for I have naught of this.’ Thereupon he will commit me to the Chief of Police, saying, “Strip him of his clothes and torment him with the bastinado till he confess and give up the hundred dinars in his possession. Wherefore, meseemeth to provide against this predicament, the best thing I can do, is to rise forthright and bash myself with the whip, so to use myself to beating.” And his Hashish [FN#209] said to him, “Rise, doff thy dress.” So he stood up and putting off his clothes, took a whip he had by him and set handy a leathern pillow; then he fell to lashing himself, laying every other blow upon the pillow and roaring out the while, “Alas! Alas! By Allah, �tis a false saying, O my lord, and they have lied against me; for I am a poor fisherman and have naught of the goods of the world!” The noise of the whip falling on the pillow and on his person resounded in the still of night and the folk heard it, and amongst others the merchants, and they said, “Whatever can ail the poor fellow, that he crieth and we hear the noise of blows falling on him?”

�Twould seem robbers have broken in upon him and are tormenting him.” Presently they all came forth of their lodgings, at the noise of the blows and the crying, and repaired to Khalifah’s room, but they found the door locked and said one to other, “Belike the robbers have come in upon him from the back of the adjoining saloon. It behoveth us to climb over by the roofs.”

So they clomb over the roofs and coming down through the sky-light, [FN#210] saw him naked and flogging himself and asked him, “What aileth thee, O Khalifah?” He answered, “Know, O folk, that I have gained some dinars and fear lest my case be carried up to the Prince of True Believers, Harun al-Rashid, and he send for me and demand of me those same gold pieces; where upon I should deny, and I fear that, if I deny, he will torture me, so I am torturing myself, by way of accustoming me to what may come.”

The merchants laughed at him and said, “Leave this fooling, may Allah not bless thee and the dinars thou hast gotten! Verily thou hast disturbed us this night and hast troubled our hearts.”

So Khalifah left flogging himself and slept till the morning, when he rose and would have gone about his business, but bethought him of his hundred dinars and said in his mind, “An I leave them at home, thieves will steal them, and if I put them in a belt [FN#211] about my waist, peradventure some one will see me and lay in wait for me till he come upon me in some lonely place and slay me and take the money: but I have a device that should serve me well, right well.” So he jumped up forthright and made him a pocket in the collar of his gaberdine and tying the hundred dinars up in a purse, laid them in the collar-pocket. Then he took his net and basket and staff and went down to the Tigris, —

And Shahrazad perceived the dawn of day and ceased to say her permitted say.

 

When it was the Eight Hundred and Thirty-sixth Night She said, It hath reached me, O auspicious King, that Khalifah the Fisherman, having set his hundred dinars in the collar-pocket took basket, staff and net and went down to the Tigris, where he made a cast but brought up naught. So he removed from that place to another and threw again, but once more the net came up empty; and he went on removing from place to place till he had gone half a day’s journey from the city, ever casting the net which kept bringing up naught. So he said to himself, “By Allah, I will throw my net a-stream but his once more, whether ill come of it or weal!” [FN#212] Then he hurled the net with all his force, of the excess and his wrath and the purse with the hundred dinars flew out of his collar-pocket and, lighting in mid-stream, was carried away by the strong current; whereupon he threw down the net and plunged into the water after the purse. He dived for it nigh a hundred times, till his strength was exhausted and he came up for sheer fatigue without chancing on it. When he despaired of finding the purse, he returned to the shore, where he was nothing but staff, net and basket and sought for his clothes, but could light on no trace of them: so he said in himself, “O vilest of those wherefor was made the byword, �The pilgrimage is not perfected save by copulation with the camel!” [FN#213] Then he wrapped the net about him and taking staff in one hand and basket in other, went trotting about like a camel in rut, running right and left and backwards and forwards, dishevelled and dusty, as he were a rebel Marid let loose from Solomon’s prison. [FN#214] So far for what concerns the Fisherman Khalifah; but as regards the Caliph Harun al-Rashid, he had a friend, a jeweller called Ibn al-Kirn�s, [FN#215] and all the traders, brokers and middle-men knew him for the Caliph’s merchant; wherefore there was naught sold in Baghdad, by way of rarities and things of price or Mamelukes or handmaidens, but was first shown to him. As he sat one day in his shop, behold, there came up to him the Shaykh of the brokers, with a slavegirl, whose like seers never saw, for she was of passing beauty and loveliness, symmetry and perfect grace, and among her gifts was that she knew all arts and sciences and could make verses and play upon all manner musical instruments. So Ibn al-Kirnas bought her for five thousand golden dinars and clothed her with other thousand; after which he carried her to the Prince of True Believers, with whom she lay the night and who made trial of her in every kind of knowledge and accomplishment and found her versed in all sorts of arts and sciences, having no equal in her time. Her name was K�t al-Kul�b [FN#216] and she was even as saith the poet, “I fix my glance on her, whene’er she wends; * And non-acceptance of my glance breeds pain:

She favours graceful-necked gazelle at gaze; * And �Graceful as gazelle’ to say we’re fain.”