HeR THouGHTS UNkNOwn, GiGi Ramos [phonics readers txt] 📗

STRUGGLES .

always dreamed of people being happy no arguing no conflict at all but hey my world is not a utopia. man do i wish it was. I live in newark nj also known as brick cityy.!! My world is filled with gang violence.. corrupted people ..drug dealers.. pimps ..sugar daddies..feens and hoes...that aint even the beginning... I think of it as people go for quick money thats how we get all them feens.. Suqar daddies and drug dealers ..etc... and so on. . . they go for quick money nd its just because they have a fucked up as past that they try to do good in the future and they cant because of all the laws that they get screwed and turn to the street for money.... i mean thats how i see it .... like if you wanted to be some body you had to put up with the bullshit and keep your head in the books and get up out the hood as we say get on your grind and make them moves.!! I see of it in livinq in a world like mine we had to do the unthinkable to get out.!!!!!! the unthinkable because no one is going to help us or give us opportunities. we have to fend for ourselves or else we end up on the streets or worse dead. mmmmm mmmm mmmm..!!


THE FUTURE

What the future hold we do not know.
It goes by so fast, I wish it were slow.
Is it positive or is it negative.
Will I be able to live threw the craziness of thinking of the future.
What will happen, who will go, when will everything end, where will everyone go, why wont anyone listen.
Don't let the world finish.
Scared much yes
I don't feel greater, I feel less.
Is it the end or is it the beginning.
BOOOOOOOM.!!!!!!!!!!!!!


THOUGHTS

I lay on my bed and I think about what might happen or what will happen to me in the future.
But like im so busy thinking about the future, that im not even paying attention to whats happening now.
Like whats happening with me and how i feel about everything right now !!!!
I feel alone, helpless, hurt and mislead.
Tooken advantage of and forgotten.
No one really knows how I feel.
But i realized that the world spins, but not everything in it does.


HER LIFE .

Theres something called life and you have to live it how god gives it to you.
She lives it more hard and differently than you could possibly imagine.
In her life there were alot of struggles.
Her mom tries to make her life better for her and her brothers and sisters, but everytime she seemed to do something right something bad happens to knock her down two steps back.
But her mother is a fighter, strong independent woman.
She gets back up wen shes knocked down.
Her mom doesnt let anything stand in her way.
And she loves her mom so much for that because her mom taught her how to be strong and not depend on nobody.
She thought that life wasnt all that good its what she made of it.
She also seen it as everything that glitters isnt gold.
Her dad on the other hand has been encarcerated so many times that she couldnt even count nomore.
And it hurts her so bad because she loves him and hes the only dad she has.
Despite him being in and out of prison and her life she doesnt regret anytime knowing him.
Since she was alittle girl she thougth life looked sweet being a certain age or getting to that point where you can do what ever you want, but now that shes 16 its a whole different ball game.
She realized that as you grow up life doesnt get easier or sweeter it gets hard and rough.
she doesnt want to take on the obsticle called life but everyone has to.
She does what ever she to do to survive and help her mom.
She tries so hard but somethings things hold her back like her thoughts about her friends, her wife,and family.
She doesnt want to leave them they are the only people she has in life.
But they still push her to do good because they already experieced life.
She loves them.


EVEN HARDER THAN LIFE... THE RELATIONSHIP!

Wow life cant get any worse for her.
Her and her wife are always arguing since she left to college.
It hurts her alot because she loves her,and she cant stand to see them mad or fighting with eachother for stupid things.
Her wife feels that the distance is making them think twice about eachother and its killing them inside.
They are all eachothers got and they dont want anything to seperate them.
Her wife means the world to her, without her support she doesnt know what she would do.
They are strong but little by little they get stronger.

Publication Date: 05-07-2011

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Dedication:
this book is for the ones unseen , unheard , and unthougth of . may your silence speak louder than words.