The vegan allegiance, John Jones [paper ebook reader TXT] 📗

The vegan allegiance

 

 

The vegan allegiance

 

His heart sank as he saw who walked through the door, but he knew he had to wear a painted smile.

"Dad, this is Carrot".

He had been told he was rather eccentric in a way, not like most people.

He's a bloody hippy, he thought.

 

With drainpipe trousers, white trainers, short-sleeve shirt, tied up dreadlocks, he looked like he'd walked in straight from a festival.

Carrot stepped across to Ian Russell and shook his hand.

Yep, as predicted, a wet-fish handshake, he thought.

"Pleased to meet you," Carrot said, "Elisa's told me so much about you".

"Not the truth, I hope" said Ian. Carrot smiled slightly.

"I've made us a meal, Elisa said you were a vegetarian".

"Vegan," he clarified, "If you're going to go without meat you may as well do it properly. I expelled myself from the school of carnivores years ago. I made a clean break. If you are going to quit then quit," he made a chopping gesture. "Vegetarians are just playing truant".

Ian shot Elisa a glance as if to say: 'Who is this head-the-ball?'

"Come on," Elisa said, "What have you cooked up for us?"

 

In his small mid-terrace house on the edge of an estate, Ian led them through into the kitchen where he had laid out a table with three plates of food curling steam into the air.

Ian pointed to one meal.

"That's yours Carrot. Hope it's to your liking," he took from the fridge a bottle of mineral spring water and handed it across.

"Elisa said you only drink water". Carrot nodded.

"I don't do chemicals," he said.

Carrot took in what had been laid out before him. Peanut noodles with garlic pasta and white beans and honey glazed baked potatoes.

"Looks nice," he said, sitting down. He pointed at the potatoes.

"Is that honey?" he asked.

"Yes, we're having the same, I've never had a vegetarian meal before. Expensive isn't it?" Carrot nodded.

"Certainly is, but I can't eat them, can't eat honey". He picked up a knife and segregated the potatoes. He nodded at the rest of the meal, giving quiet approval.

There was silence for a few moments as they all settled and began to eat.

 

"So," said Ian, "Why are you called Carrot?"

"Well, as you can see I'm quite a skinny guy, and a few years ago I was at the Coachella festival in California, so when I got back I had quite the suntan. I was orange, and I had my dreadlocks up at the time, and one of my mates, bloody meat-eater, said I looked like a big carrot. He found it funny and others did as well. I didn't, but you know what," he said, pointing his fork, "You know what, I switched it into a positive. I 'wanted' to be called Carrot, and it stuck, now I like it, I turned it on him".

"Right," Ian muttered.

"Think your Elisa's gonna be coming round to her senses soon," Carrot continued. Ian paused his potato on its way to his mouth.

"What d'you mean?"

"She's well on her way to becoming a real vegan".

"Yes," said Elisa, mustering as much enthusiasm as she could, "Been veggie for about two months now, but I'm being taught how to be a proper vegan," she smiled at Carrot.

"I tell you what Ian, good job she found me, and is willing to become a fully fledged vegan, because, you know, I couldn't date a meat-eater, someone who consumes flesh", he grimaced, "Worse than someone who smokes. I mean, it's okay for you Ian, no offence or anything, but you're of the past. Elisa's told me you eat meat, but you can't help that. I do feel sorry for you but meat-eaters are a dying breed and rightly so".

Suddenly the food in Ian's mouth seemed to taste bitter, and he shot Elisa another glance, but she was pushing her food around with her knife as if contemplating whether to eat it or not.

Ok, thought Ian, it's like that is it?

"Have you ever eaten meat?" he asked.

"In my teens," he said. "I'll admit, I found it okay at the time, but looking back in hindsight, absolutely vile. I woke up in my twenties and went straight vegan, cut meat out like that," he made a chopping gesture with his knife.

"It's just that, I'm surprised you have enough strength to lift up the knife and fork".

Elisa looked at her father with widened eyes. Carrot made a sarcastic laugh.

"Never heard that one before, ha ha, hear that Elisa? saying I'm weak". Elisa just smiled slightly without humour. There was another period of silence as they ate.

"Does it...?" asked Ian, "Does it make a difference going vegan? I mean does it change anything?"

"It's the principal," said Carrot, rather too loudly, pointing the fork.

"If enough of us get together and make our voice heard, we can make a difference yes. If I had my way I would ban meat. Honestly. We don't need it to live on. Dead flesh affects your brain, makes you stupid. I've never come across an intelligent meat-eater yet. In fact I think there might be some genetic connection between meat and greed".

"Meat and greed?" put in Elisa.

"All corporations and governments are greedy. Fact of life babe. I bet they're all meat-eaters. We're made of flesh right? Is it normal for flesh to consume flesh?" He shook his head. "No. We've been given intelligence right, brains to discover the wonders of food, of healthy living that doesn't involve meat".

"Nature's given us a choice," said Ian, "We're omnivores, we can either eat plants or meat or both".

"Eating meat is the easy way out for idiots who just want to consume dead flesh because they can't be bothered to find the real, healthy foods out there. Meat is a cop-out, and it's murder. What they do to animals to get the meat is an absolute disgrace".

"It's behind closed doors," said Ian, quietly.

"Beats me why I still talk to meat-eaters, braindead zombies, as bad as smokers. They're just as thick and stupid".

"So, are you calling me an idiot just because I eat meat?" asked Ian. There was a long pause. Carrot nodded.

"Looks like it, yes. If you want to stuff your face with dead flesh then go right ahead. I don't mean to be offensive but yes, you're stupid, and vegetarians as well. Spineless fools".

"Carrot!" said Elisa.

"That's what you'll get with me. Pure honesty. If you don't like it, there's plenty of other fish in the sea".

"Thought you didn't eat fish," put in Ian.

"That's correct," said Carrot with a laugh.

"You're entitled to your opinion," Ian continued, "As backwards as it is. If nature says I can consume meat then that's exactly what I'm going to do".

"See Elisa," said Carrot, "Proof that he's a dinosaur. I talk about this kind of thing at the vegan allegiance meetings".

"Vegan allegiance?" asked Ian.

"Yes, I'm the founder and we're a growing group and we meet to discuss ways of spreading veganism further and to talk about our experiences. Elisa's joining us, arn't you?" Elisa just tucked into her meal and nodded.

"Really?" asked Ian, disappointment on his face.

"Anyway," Carrot continued, "The consumption of flesh is being 'evolved out' by nature. Flesh is provided for the idiot who cannot live off the land, who can't cook healthily from natural ingredients. Your bone-headed moron who eats burgers. You watch in a hundred years time, veganism will be normal, and we'll wonder just what on earth we were doing when we used to eat meat. Children are gonna be shocked. 'Hey son, d'you know that bunny rabbit and those cows, and those chickens and those pigs. People used to eat them'. 'Eat them!' the child would say. 'Yes son, they ate them'. 'That's disgusting', he would say. 'Yes son, it was'. So we at the vegan allegiance are trying to make our voice heard, and Elisa has agreed to join us on our next outing".

"Outing?" said Ian, chewing on his pasta, "What, going to hug some trees and dance with bunny rabbits through the meadows? How many's in this 'alliance' anyway?"

"Eight," put in Elisa, "There's eight in the allegiance".

"Eight!" Ian laughed.

Carrot was quiet for a few moments and muttered to Elisa, "See what I mean? dinosaur".

The meal wound up and Carrot shook Ian's hand, albeit reluctantly, and they all walked to the front door to see Carrot out.

"So what are you planning at these meetings anyway?"

"Well, we do have a message planned, and it'll certainly make people think about things. See you there tomorrow Elisa," he said, then walked away.

"What message?" Ian asked

"No idea," she said.

"Anyway, are you serious? Him, lettuce-chewing ponce".

"Ah, he's okay, his heart's in the right place".

"Oh, is it?"

"I'll give him a chance".

"You know better than to be brainwashed by the likes of him though don't you?"

"Come on dad, you know me better than that".

"Just making sure". They went inside, Ian closing the door.

 

Jizza, Snowy, Vixen, Bonk, Dizzy, Bubble and Sausage, were each handed a pile of leaflets by Carrot. They were the other members of the vegan allegiance, and all except for Jizza and Elisa, they were a mixture of skaters and goths.

They were at their usual meeting place, beneath an old oak tree in the local park.

"Ok," said Carrot, "We'll meet back here at one. We need to discuss tomorrow nights message to the nation". They all mumbled and nodded, then dispersed to where they would hand out the leaflets which basically said:

'Meat makes fools,

Meat rots your mind,

Meat is murder,

The future is vegan,

Join the vegan allegiance'.

Besides that there was a clipart silhouette of a cow in a red circle with a line through.

Beneath it was Carrot's and Vixen's phone numbers.

"Alright babes, you're with me," he said to Elisa.

They walked around a mile into the town centre, and in the paved shopping area there was an independent butchers with an array of meats in the window. Carrot stood there with a look of disgust on his face, shook his head, then gave Elisa a section of leaflets.

"Just hand them out to anyone". Elisa nodded and walked a few metres away and began trying to hand them out, as did Carrot.

Most people simply ignored them and walked on past. Some took them. Some took them and further down the way threw them away.

"Join the vegan allegiance," said Carrot, loudly, "Meat is murder". One or two people looked his way, but most people carried on ignoring him.

"Meat rots your brain". A man walked towards the butchers but Carrot shoved a leaflet at him.

"Meat is murder," he said. The man glanced at the leaflet, shook his head, and carried on into the shop.

"Join the vegan allegiance," Carrot said again. A few people took the leaflets.

 

Elisa came walking back over.

"Some people are so ignorant arn't they?" she said. He nodded.

"They sure are," and another customer went to walk in only to be faced with another leaflet which they dodged.

A customer left the shop with a wrapped up package, clearly a cut of meat.

"That's right, carnivore, hope you choke on it". The woman stopped and looked at Carrot, as though trying to decide whether or not to respond. She decided not to and continued on.

Elisa looked at Carrot with a sense of disdain.

"What on earth is going on here?" came a loud voice from behind. Elisa and Carrot turned to see the butcher standing in the doorway, a person who 'looked' like a butcher. He was over-weight, had a bald head, a long, stained apron, and stood there with his hands on his hips scowling at them both.

"Don't you be scaring away my customers. I've got enough to contend with with the supermarkets taking my business away without some leaf-munching fairies making it worse, now clear-off!" He hooked his thumb in a 'scram' gesture.

"Happy to sell heart disease, diabetes, cancer to people are you? Obviously you don't care about that do you? Don't you know meat is bad for you?"

"Is